Page 118 of Untamed

My worst fears are confirmed.

His tone is soft, almost coaxing. “I know what you really want, Ember. It’s alright that you’re playing hard to get. I know you really want me; you just haven’t admitted it even to yourself yet.”

My heart thuds painfully. He’s delusional, a fucking psychopath, andI hate him.

“You say you only like these mafia men and dangerous situations in your books,” he continues. The car turns sharply. “But I know the truth. You crave danger. You’re not afraid of it, not at all.” He chuckles. “You kinky little girl.”

I squeeze my eyes shut as bile burns the back of my throat.

“I know you better than he does. He’s not like us.” His voice drops to a dangerous register. I want to scream at him, but I’m gagged and incapable. “He’s playing at being protective. Pretending he didn’t use you to build status when that’s exactly what he did.”

What?

“I see you, Ember. The real you. And you know I love you, even if you’ve disappointed me.”

Tears burn my blindfold. I fight a sob that threatens to break free as I twist my hands and try to find a weak spot.

Does Rodion know I’m gone?

Is he tracking me?

Shawn’s words press on me like the cold, steel edge of a blade to my neck. “You can fight me, but I know the truth. I’m the one who deserves you. Not him.”

My breathing hitches.

No.

My body might tremble, but my heart steadies.

I think back to Rodion’s smirk, the way he’d lift my chin when I got riled up. He let me fight him. He let me push back, gave me agency and free will. He knows how much that matters to me.

Maybe that’s why I love him.I love him.

Here, in the back of Shawn’s car, I see so clearly now it makes my heart ache.

I trust him.

Maybe my book boyfriends offer safety in danger, a place where I can explore but stay in control. The fantasy was never about submission but about trust.

I’m not going to lose him.

Iwanthim to protect me. I want that fierce, sometimes irrational, unapologetic dedication to keeping me safe.Owning me.

I want all of it.

Shawn won’t win. I’ll be sure of it. He won’t.

An engine roars behind us, growing louder.

Oh god, oh please, please be Rodion.

I can still see the lethal flicker of his eyes as he promises brutal retribution to anyone who tries to hurt me.

I’d tie him to a chair and make him watch me ruin you, slow and raw, before I cut out his eyes…

Rodion doesn’t bluff. He gives me all of who he is, the brutal and the beautiful, every ounce of morally gray that I crave in my books right here, in all his Bratva glory, tats and weapons, and the fierce, undying protection of a man who loves me.

You don’t want a gentleman, little queen.

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