Page 123 of Over the Edge

“We all have those days…just means you need your caffeine fix, right?”

“Yeah,” I readily agree and tap my phone that still has the article I was reading pulled up. I catch the barista reading the headline the second before my card pulls up on the screen. Great.

At least the moment of embarrassment makes me exit out of the browser so no one else can see that I’ve Googled myself.

I make it out the door and a few feet down the sidewalk when Mom calls. I know it’s her before I take out my phone, like I can feel her frustration through the radio waves.

“Hey!” I answer, refusing to implicate myself until I need to. For all I know she’s vowed to not go on the internet.

“Why is it I heard from Lori this morning that you are in a relationship with Garrett? You know how embarrassing it is to have to play along like I knew? My own daughter doesn’t tell me something but everyone else already seems to know,” she reprimands, and I feel myself shrinking while wanting to give the exact right answer to placate her.

“I was going to tell you,” I say.

“But you didn’t,” she snaps.

“It’s new, I didn’t want to say anything until it was official,” I say, still trying to mend the already fraying threads of this situation.

“It looks official now.”

I jump to explain. “We didn’t post the video. We were just helping someone and they posted it. I’m still on vacation.”

“So you go on vacation with him and you still don’t think that’s important enough to share? The only man I’ve gone on vacation with was your father.”

I don’t know if it’s the pressure or the exhaustion that causes it but I snap, not completely, not the way that I would have as a teenager, but more than I have in years. “I am a grown woman. My relationships aremyconcern, not yours. I’m thirty. This isn’t a guy who’s taking me to homecoming.”

“But you didn’t tell us.”

“I didn’t,” I echo. “I should be allowed to choose that.”

“What else aren’t you saying? First, an entire relationship, what else are you comfortable keeping from us?” she demands.

“I have to go,” I say. I can’t do this right now, not when she won’t listen. Not when I know the only thing on her mind is Drew and how he pulled away. This conversation isn’t about me. It’s never been about me. I wish it was. Maybe then I’d actually be comfortable telling them things instead of doing it to appease them. I hate that they make me feel so young sometimes, but I guess that’s what parents do. They have a special gift, to tear you down to an early version of yourself even when you’ve grown.

“No, we're talking.” Her voice sharpens further, but I can’t take another cut from the words she’s wielding against me.

“No. You’re talking and I can’t do this right now. Maybe you should ask yourself why I didn’t tell you.” I hang up the second the words are out. She calls back again. The notifications keep popping up as I text Quinn.

I can’t do this.

Evelyn

I’m doing the interview.

Quinn

I'll pick you up in an hour.

45

Garrett

“Ijust think it’s better this way, you know?” Evelyn’s voice cracks over the phone. She told me not to come over, to let her pack in peace.

“I told you I’d be with you no matter what you chose and support you. That hasn’t changed,” I soothe. I want to tell her to change her mind and contradict everything I said last night. “Are you sure you don’t want me there?”

“Yes,” she says. “Quinn will be here soon. I don’t want to make her late for her flight.”

“Tell me how it goes. I’m rooting for you,” I tell her. “Call me when you land.”

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