Page 84 of While We Waited

He places a hand on my cheek. “You are panicking, Sunshine.”

I open my mouth to deny it again but he places a finger over my mouth to silence me.

“No, Sunshine. You aren’t denying what is obvious to see. You think I don’t know what someone having a panic attack looks like?”

“How—”

“No. We’re not discussing my experience with panic attacks. You’re not putting me off any longer. Why are you panicking?”

“Maybe it’s none of your business.”

“It sure as hell is my business when you’re planning to run away from me.”

“I’m not running away.”

He scowls. “You were muttering to yourself about your suitcase when you came dashing out of the bathroom.”

“Maybe I need my suitcase to move my stuff into your bedroom.”

He lifts an eyebrow. “I never pegged Nova Myers for a coward.”

I glare at him. “I’m not a coward! How dare you say I am!”

“If the shoe fits…” He shrugs.

My nostrils flare. How dare he? I am the furthest thing from a coward. He’s not a grump. He’s an asshole.

“I am not a coward. A coward doesn’t hold her mother’s hand as she dies. A coward doesn’t go to school the next day despite knowing everyone pities her. A coward doesn’t get up every single day and smile at life despite how life has kicked her down time and time again.”

My chest heaves as I fight to keep myself from hyperventilating.

“If you’re not a coward, why are you running away from me? From the life we can have together?”

“Because I don’t want you to die!” I scream as tears burst from my eyes and course down my cheeks.

Hudson wipes the tears from my face. “I’m not going to die.”

“Yes, you are! Everyone I love dies.”

He wraps his arms around me and hauls me to him. I cling to him. I shouldn’t. I should push him away. Now that he knows the truth, he won’t care if I leave.

“I’m sorry about your mom and dad. I can’t imagine how devastating it was to lose them at such a young age.”

“It was horrible,” I blubber. “I miss them so much.”

He guides his hand up and down my back as he sways me from side to side. “I know you do, Sunshine. I know you do.”

“Our baby won’t have my mom as her grandmother or my dad as her grandfather. They’re missing everything.”

“We’ll tell them about baby Sprog. And we’ll tell the baby about your parents. We’ll make sure Sprog knows how wonderful they were.”

We? He doesn’t get it. There can’t be a we. I push away from him.

“We aren’t going to do anything because I’m leaving.”

“You are not leaving,” he grumbles.

“You can’t keep me here!”

---