Page 50 of Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang Us, Daddy

She looks away, and the harsh overhead lighting sparkles against the sweat now formed at her brow. “How should I know?”

“You’re Mrs. Matthews’ best friend. I should certainly hope you know how she is. Tell me, do you still play cards twice a week?” He glances over his shoulder at us. “Mrs. McGuire’s Bridge club is a staple around these parts. Women and homosexual men wait years to be invited into the fold. My ex-wife was a member once.” He turns back to Marnie. “Lindsay always had the best stories when she came home after a long night.” He waits for a response, but when she fails to provide one, any pretense of civility falls by the wayside. “This was Benjamin and Bennet’s happy place. You took that from them. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised—you have a habit of taking things that don’t belong to you. Don’t you, Mrs. McGuire? I justwonder if Mrs. Matthews is missing a husband. Shall we call her and ask?”

She quickly shakes her head, her eyes still locked on the counter as if she’s hoping a black hole might appear and swallow her up. “No, Dr. St. James.”

“Good. I’m glad we’re on the same page.” As if he hasn’t just threatened a woman’s livelihood, Daddy shoves his hands in his pockets and takes a few steps back until he’s right between us. “Now, I would like for you to apologize to my boys, and I would like you to help them pick out the best dang teddy bears this side of the border.” He shares a knowing smirk with me, then with Benji. “Doesn’t that sound fun, boys?”

She swallows. “I’m sorry, Nathan. Of course they can come in.” She stares down at us with a genuine look of terror. “I’m very sorry if I was cruel.” She darts her eyes to Daddy, then immediately back at us. “Please forgive me.”

A smile curls on Benji’s face as he watches her squirm. “Nope,” Benji says. Jesus. His smile keeps spreading even wider until I can see every tooth he has. I’m pretty sure he’s getting off on this. “You’re not forgiven. Too bad, so sad, if you do it again, I’m gonna tell Dad.”

Nate snorts, letting out a loud, overwhelming belly laugh. “God, you’re adorable. All right. Let’s build some bears.”

Nate leads us away from the counter, toward the wall of unstuffed bears. As Benji picks through them carefully, I look up at Nate. He’s staring at Benji like a father watching his son’s turn at bat during the Little League championship. I still can’t believe any of this is real. When we were younger, Benji used to lie on our bed and draw doodles of what his perfect Build-A-Bear would look like, knowing he wouldn’t ever get to have one of his own. I would indulge him, drawing poor depictions of potential bear friends. As silly as it was, it always centered me. While my mom was passed out drunk in the living room, I could fade awayfrom the real world and feel at peace, if only for a moment. Nate’s been going through a lot, too, and I kind of want him to feel that peace. To stare down at the bear he bought with us and know he’s loved.

“Was there something you needed, son?” he asks, pulling me out of my head. I have to blink a few times to get my bearings.

“Obviously,” I spit out before covering my mouth with the hand not holding Daddy’s. “Sorry. That was really rude. It just slipped out.” Daddy lets go of me and pulls my hand away from my mouth. There isn’t a drop of anger on his face like I expected. Instead, there’s this overwhelming look of awe. “I’m so sorry.”

He gives me no chance to react, just leans in and kisses me with everything he’s got. Unlike the kisses before, Daddy doesn’t settle for a peck on the lips. His tongue tears through my mouth, twirling with mine. It goes on and on until it feels like our tangling tongues are the only things left in the world. When he finally breaks the kiss, he rests his forehead against mine.

“Don’t ever apologize for showing your bratty side. It’s beautiful, Bennet. Watching you come out of your shell—seeing you open up to me—you have no idea what it does to me.” There’s a new look in his eyes. One that makes my pants dance a little as my dick swells beneath them. Glancing down, I notice the telltale signs of an erection forming in his slacks as well.

“Naughty Daddy,” I whisper, nipping at his chin. “Horny Daddy.”

His lips are parted, and he’s breathing heavily against my face, the scents of mall pretzels and mustard almost lull me into a hypnotic state. “Dang right, I am.” He gives me another quick kiss, and when it’s done, he doesn’t retreat, just touches his forehead against mine again and smiles. “What was it you wanted to ask me, sweetheart?”

Now that I’ve got his attention, I’m feeling a little unnerved. It’s such a silly little want, but it’s something I want more than anything at this very moment. “Will you also get a bear?”

“You want me to get a bear, son?”

I nod. “If this is a date, I want you to have something to remember it by too.”

“I would love that.” He gives me another quick kiss on the lips before looking over at Benji. Benji’s got his cheek between his teeth, chewing softly as he tries to find the perfect stuffy. “Benjamin?” Benji looks over his shoulder, smiling when he sees Nate staring down at him. Nate holds a hand out, inviting him over, and it’s an invitation Benji jumps at. He rushes over until they’re standing chest to chest. Nate grabs him by the waist, pulling him closer until there’s no space left between them. Their mouths connect and Nate’s tongue slips past Benji’s lips, Benji’s eyes bulge at the sudden intrusion, but it doesn’t take him long to melt into the embrace, allowing Daddy to control the kiss.

It’s strange, really. In the past, with other boyfriends, I’ve always had trace amounts of jealousy when they’d kiss Benji like this. There was always a small ball of resentment settled in the pit of my stomach, and I could never understand where it came from. Now, I know. Even with Tatum, it never felt this natural, and that’s all down to Nate. This steamy kiss doesn’t leave me hot and bothered. It leaves me in awe. Breathless. Dumbfounded by how true it feels.

“I love you, Dad,” Benji says as he pulls away. He turns to me. “And I love you, Bennet.” He takes both our hands and kisses our knuckles, one by one.

“We love you, buddy.” He stares past us, toward the display rack in the back, housing endless options of potential new teddy bears. “Those bears look awfully lonely over there. Do you think we can find a few to bring home with us?”

Benji’s nodding like an overexcited child, tugging the tail of my shirt. “Yeah. Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!”

Daddy leads us over to the display rack and stares at the selection like it’s the hardest decision he’ll ever make. Benji slides out of Daddy’s hold and rushes forward, falling to his knees as he inspects the options at the bottom. He ooh’s and ah’s over teddy bears and bunnies, studying each face in search for his new best friend. There’s a really adorable bear that kind of reminds me of Nate. He’s got big brown eyes and super dark lashes. He’s even got eyebrows, and a few of them are longer than the rest, making them look bushy like Nate’s. He’s absolutely adorable.

Every fiber of my being wants to let go of my fear and just let myself be wild, but I’m scared Nate might look at me like I’m stupid if I let my playful side out. Then I look up at him, and I feel like I’m radiating in the love he’s pouring out of his eyes, right at us. He must be able to tell I’m nervous about something because he gives me an assuring nod and mouths, “You’re okay. You’re safe.”

Safe.

We’re finally safe.

He’s told us countless times, but this is the first time the words truly register. I know I’m safe. I know he won’t shame me, because this is my Daddy. This is the Daddy I’ve dreamed of all my life. The Daddy I want to stay with for the rest of my life.

I’m in love with him.

It’s an awakening, but more than that, it feels like destiny. Like all the hurt and our three broken hearts were the cost we had to pay to get here. Now, no one can take it away, because we’ve earned it. We’ve paid our dues. Three hearts beating in time.

I touch my half-heart necklace and smile, because there’s an idea forming in my mind. Hopefully when and if we get apaycheck from the agency, I can breathe life to that dream. For now, though, I allow myself to be wild, because, like Daddy said, I’m safe.

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