Page 46 of Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang Us, Daddy

“And he’s our Daddy,” I tell him, my voice sterner than it has any right being. I love Tatum, but I’m not going to sit back and let him take this from us without putting up a hell of a fight first. “We love him.”

“So, that’s what this is?” Tatum’s glaring at me, and going off the look in his eyes, I’m pretty sure he’d punch me if he were here. “You couldn’t find a Daddy, so you stole my dad? I swear to God, Benji. Where the hell do you get off?”

“In your father’s mouth, hopefully,” I say. I know it’s a bit much, but I don’t care. He’s being an asshole right now. Wedidn’t give him hell when he and his giant boyfriend drugged us for a week after being rescued. We didn’t bat an eye when Tatum asked us to jack off with all his friends as he railed his husband for the first time during their wedding reception. He has no right to be so cruel.

“I will fucking demolish you,” Tatum hisses.

“Tatum,” Bennet whispers. “Please? We’re not trying to hurt you. We didn’t mean for it to happen, but it has.” He looks up at Dad with tears in his eyes. “We love him.”

“I don’t give a damn who you think you love. This isn’t happening. Get it out of your heads. I swear to the Goddess, if you even think of penetrating the St. James family lineage, I will tear you fucking asunder!”

“Asunder?” I ask, because I’m not really sure what that word means. Whatever it is, it doesn’t sound good, but I’ve got a few choice words for him too.

“You will rue this day,” he growls. “Do you hear me? I will see to it.”

“Oh, yeah? Well, I’m gonna take a bottle of hawaiian punch and?—”

“Enough!” Dad barks, startling all three of us. “You left, Tate. Now, I understand you’re frustrated, and I acknowledge my part in this emotional downfall era you seem to be in, but Benji and Bennet are family. They’re ours, son.”

“They arenotmy family. They’re my ex-boyfriends who, up until five minutes ago, I thought were doing well. Now it seems they’ve fallen headfirst into depravity.” He narrows his eyes. “Have you fucked them?”

Dad’s jaw drops. “Who I do or do not sleep with is none of your concern.”

“It’s my business if my father’s fallen prey to a pack of harlots with a non-existent moral compass. How long did it take,huh? How long before they had you hovering over them in bed, stuffing them like a festive Christmas turkey?”

“Excuse me?”

“Dad, it’s okay,” I say, squeezing his thigh. I hate seeing him like this. He’s the sweetest man I’ve ever met, and he doesn’t deserve any of the rage Tatum’s directing his way.

“It is not in any way okay. He just insinuated that you’re predators. No one gets to talk to you like that. Never again, remember? I swore it. Forever and ever. I don’t care if it’s the monster or if it’s my own flesh and blood. No one ever gets to make you feel less than what you are to me.”

“What am I?” I ask, my heart fluttering in my chest.

Dad studies my face, then Bennet’s. “You’re the very best part of my day. Both of you. I’ve been lonely for years, and you boys make me feel like I never have to be lonely again. After Tatum moved away, I used to dread coming home. I would spend hours waiting on a wife who barely acknowledged I was in the room. You boys make me feel like I belong, and I’ll be damned if I let anyone hurt you again. You’re mine. I don’t care what anyone says on the matter. Do you hear me? You’re mine. Both of you.” On the screen, Tatum’s looking wonderstruck by the exchange, but his expression doesn’t ease Dad’s anger. They stare at each other for an uncomfortable length of time before Dad finally says, “I apologize if it bothers you that I’m having a late-life bisexual awakening, but it doesn’t change the fact that I love them. They’re my world, so if you’ve got a problem with it, I suggest you sort it out, because they’re not going anywhere. I’m going to look after them. I’m going to take care of them for as long as they’ll let me.”

“Dad—” Tatum starts, only to be cut off.

“This is their home. I am their home. We’re a package deal. If you want to tell me I can’t pursue anything with them, then you just bring your ass down here, and tell me to my face. Untilthen, I don’t want to hear a single word. I swear to God, Tatum. I ask you for nothing, and I expect nothing, because I want you to be able to live your life in bliss without worrying about having to call and check on me every five minutes. I’ve asked for nothing, and that’s exactly what you give in return. Not a goddamn thing. When was the last time you called me? When’s the last time you responded to any of my texts?”

I’ve never heard Dad sound this angry before or throw out swear words with abandon. He’s always so calm and collected. It feels like that part inThe Wizard of Ozwhere they pull back the curtain to find a Grumpy Gus on the other side. Has this version of Nate St. James been hidden here all along? Or, has he simply reached his boiling point, choosing this moment to voice the bitter resentment festering inside.

“Dad, I didn’t . . .”

“Don’t.” He shakes his head. “As I said, if you have something to say to me, then you come down here and say it in person. Until then, don’t you dare try to tell me how I should or shouldn’t live my life. I don’t answer to you, son.” Dad flings the phone onto the coffee table and stands up. He makes his way toward the foyer, pausing at the doorframe. Tatum’s still there, staring up at the ceiling, looking white as a ghost.

“Boys?”

“Yes, sir?” we ask.

Without looking back, Dad says, “Get dressed. Pick something that makes you feel pretty.”

“Why?” Bennet asks.

He looks over his shoulder and gives Bennet a clipped nod. “Because I’m taking my boyfriends on our first date.”

He storms upstairs, his feet slamming against each step, making the walls rattle. All I can do is stare at Bennet, trying to make sense of this. Tatum’s sniffle pulls me out of the moment, and when I grab the phone and pick it up, I stare at my ex-boyfriend, hoping my disappointment in his behavior is clear enough on my face.

“Please?” Bennet whispers, his voice small and fragile. He looks up at the screen with pleading eyes. “We love him, Tater Tot. He makes us happy. Please don’t take that away from us.”

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