Page 18 of Wistful Whispers

“I want you there,” she sighs and places her hand on mine. “It’s nice to know I’m not in this alone.”

“You know you’re not.” I’ve told her a hundred times already and I’ll tell her another thousand times if that’s what it takes.

We finish up, and then head over to the sofa in the living room, mugs of tea in hand. I flick on the TV and find QI. She settles in close to me and soon we’re both chuckling at the ridiculous trivia and clever digs from the panel.

After a few minutes she turns to look at me with a serious expression.

“Jake… I don’t get it.”

“What’s that?”

“We have been dating for literally like three and a bit weeks. In a few weeks there’ll be a baby and you’re not even the father. Most men would run for the hills. Why are you still here? Why do you love me?”

I look at her, caught off guard. Her eyes have that softness in them, a mix of fear and sadness, like she’s already bracing for something she thinks I’m about to say. I take a deep breath, letting the question settle in the air between us.

“Why am I still here?” I repeat, running a hand through my hair as I think about how to put it into words. “Hanny-bee… I don’t know how else to say it, but there isn’t anywhere else I’d want to be.”

She looks down, her fingers fiddling with the hem of her jumper. “But it doesn’t make sense. You didn’t sign up for all this—this whole thing with the baby, with… well, me. It’s messy and I don’t want to drag you into it just because—”

“Just because what?” I interrupt, moving a bit closer to her. “Just because things are complicated? Because it’s not the ‘perfect timing’ or whatever? Look, none of that matters to me, alright? I’m here because… I love you. All of you. And that includes our little princess.”

She blinks, taking it in, but her face is still full of worry. “But Jake, you know it’s not your baby. It’ll never be—”

“I know that,” I say gently, taking her hand in mine. “And that doesn’t change anything for me. I don’t need a claim to this kid. Just because I’m not… not the biological father, doesn’t mean I can’t love her too. Doesn’t mean I can’t be here for both of you.”

She looks at me, searching my face like she’s trying to find a catch but there isn’t one. “You’re not afraid? That one day… I don’t know that this won’t feel enough for you?”

“You’ve been enough for me since the day we met,” I say, my voice coming out softer than expected. “I’ve loved you since way before any of this happened. I’m not running for the hills because I don’t want to be anywhere else. I want to be right here, with you, with this little girl, through all of it.”

She lets out a shaky breath and I feel her fingers tighten around mine. “You know,” she whispers, “I’ve spent so long wondering if I was doing the right thing, if I’d be enough for this kid on my own… I didn’t expect you to be so… sure.”

“Good thing you don’t have to do it on your own then, yeah?” I say, brushing a strand of hair from her face, letting my hand linger on her cheek. She leans into my touch, her eyes closing for a moment, and when she opens them I can see that sadness melting away, replaced with something that looks a lot more like hope.

“Jake…” she starts, but I close the gap and kiss her softly, letting her know without words that she doesn’t need to explain anymore. When we pull back she’s smiling, a little shy but still full of that warmth I’ve loved from the start.

“Come here,” I say, pulling her close to me on the sofa. We settle back into our spot, her head resting on my shoulder, her hand in mine. QI’s still playing in the background but it’s just noise now, a steady hum that fills the room. My mind is with Hannah and our little girl. She’ll be ours, mine and hers, as long as she wants me. And I won’t let anyone take this from me.

“I won’t be long Hanny-bee,” I tell her as I cross the road towards the car park.

“I could just walk home?” she suggests from the other end of the line.

“No!”

“Jake, it’s been three weeks since the man gave me the business card. You can’t act as my bodyguard for the rest of our lives.” I know she’s right but I don’t trust the peace yet. The police said they’d spoken with him and warned him to stay away from me. But all it takes is one unguarded moment and Grant could get a chance to get to her.

“I know, but I’d feel better if I pick you up. Don’t make me call Ols on you,” I push back. Oliver has been the best big brother ever. Whenever I can’t be there to protect her he drops anything and makes sure he watches over her. I get that an independent person like Hannah doesn’t like it but in this case I won’t budge.

“What about your safety?” she argues back.

“I’m in public. I just picked up some sausage rolls for you and I’m heading to the car now.”

“From Cherry Pie?” I know her. She loves everything from the Cherry Pie bakery, but nothing more than the sausage rolls.

“Of course.”

“Oh my hero. I shall wait like a good girl for you to pick me up,” she giggles.

“Five minutes,” I promise her before hanging up.

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