Page 113 of Endgame

I think that’s what hurts the most.

I’m standing by the outdoor light casting an eerie glow on the front door. Maybe I’ll sit here and wait.

Don’t cry, don’t cry. It hurts so fucking bad.

Make it stop. Please.

He said he would never leave. He promised. Why do I have to love him so much that I’m justifying his actions in my head? His actions tonight don’t deserve my forgiveness, but I find myself wanting to give it to him anyway.

I know him and have a sinking feeling he fears the worst, so he assumed the worst—that I was leaving.

We share the same fear. Callaway knows that.

Yet, he still left.

And the tears threaten.

45

DAKOTA

I don’t knowhow long it’s been since I’ve been sitting out here.

My back is seated against the brownstone’s brick wall. I must have fallen asleep after the tears dried.

I haven’t cried like that since the day in the truck with Cal.

It was as if all my feelings flooded to the surface—hurt, pain, sorrow, happiness, joy, love. I seemed to go through a toxic cycle of each emotion in the amount of time since he’s been gone.

Where would he even go?

I start to feel like I’m regaining control again and work myself to stand, holding cautiously against the wall for support.

My head is pounding, and my eyes feel like weights from all the crying I’ve done.

I reach for my phone in hopes of finding missed calls or messages from Callaway, but there’s nothing.

I open a series of texts from Navy, making sure I’m okay.

Navy:You good, Kodi?

Navy:Where did you go? Let me know if you need me. I’m worried.

Navy:I love you. Don’t go easy on him.

At this moment, I’m reminded how much I need my best friend. I text Navy quickly, hoping she sees my message sooner than later.

Dakota:Front door.Please.

Navy:On it, babe.

The sound of Navy opening the front door and rushing to my side brings a rush of tears to my eyes. I know it puts her in a weird place—me crying over her brother at their parents’ house—but I need her. I need not to feel alone for a minute.

As soon as I see her, I allow myself the luxury to fall apart.

“I didn’t hear much, but wanna tell me what happened?” Navy asks.

I whimper on a soft sob, “He…he left, Navs. I told your mom how much I cared about him and that he’s part of why I turned down a job offer. All he heard was ajob offerbefore storming out. He didn’t ask me; he assumed the worst.”

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