Page 30 of Be My Reason

“Fine,” I say, “one dance.” I walk out ahead of him onto the dance floor as a slow song begins to play. He takes me in his arms without even asking, placing his hands around my lower back. I put my hands on his shoulders and instantly his smell washes over me. That smell of fresh laundry and Nate that invokes so many memories.

He pulls me closer and I have no choice but to wrap my arms around his neck. We dance like this for minutes without uttering a word.I don’t think I’m capable of words right now. He is stroking my back through my thin silky dress. My entire world, my sole focus is on the small circles he is rubbing with those large hands and the heat that is generating from his touch.

I can feel his heart pounding on his chest wall. Or maybe that is my heart. He is matching my heavy breathing breath for breath. This is wrong. I can’t do this. I squeeze my eyes shut and try to muster the courage to push away from him and walk away.

He blows out a breath. “Brooklyn, why didn’t you tell me?Why didn’t Graham or Emma tell me? I mean, I’m sorry, I know it must have been terrible for you. I can’t imagine what you had to go through. But, what the hell, Brooklyn . . . why?”

“Why didn’t I tell you?” I pull back and look at him like he is crazy. “Why didn’t I tell you?” I repeat, as we stop dancing. “Because I knew you would try to lure me into your bed as soon as you found out. I was mourning the loss of the man I loved. The man who should have been my husband.” I take a breath. “But then again, you apparently don’t care about the sanctity of marriage since you threw your own down the toilet when you cheated on your wife.”

He drops my hands like I just burned him.

“I’m not a cheater, Brooklyn.I’ve never cheated on anyone in my life. My wife was the one who cheated. She ruined my goddamn life and then she ruined my goddamn marriage.”

He turns and walks away, leaving a small crowd staring at me. I smile at them as a blush creeps over my face and then I make my way back to my table and to the security of Ryan.

Chapter Ten

I don’t want to release Emma from the big bear hug we’ve got going on. As soon as I do, she will leave me, and my life as I know it will change forever.

I’ve taken the morning off to see them on their way as they leave for Paris. I knew this day was coming.I’ve tried to prepare myself. I have to let her go live her life with Graham. But I don’t have to be happy about it.

“Lyn, we’ll be back in two weeks and we’ll spend the whole weekend together before I have to move.” She winks at Graham who gives her a knowing look. “Plus, we’ll be back tons on weekends and holidays. You’ll get sick of us.”

“I know and I’m so happy for you guys.I’m just going to miss the heck out of you.” I wipe the tears away—again. Emma and I are getting all blubbery and weepy. Then there is a knock at the door and Graham springs up to get it, probably happy to get out of this room so full of estrogen.

When we’ve pulled ourselves together and are putting another pot of coffee on, Graham walks back in the room.And Nate walks in right behind him.

“What ishedoing here?” I blurt out, not very nicely. I’m still pissed at him for stomping away after that revelation he made to me last night. He didn’t talk, or even look at me for the rest of the night.

I still haven’t gotten the chance to ask Emma about it. I’m sure Emma knows everything about everything as she has practically lived in Raleigh at least part time over the past six months. All this time, I’ve told her not to talk to me about Nate. But after last night, I wonder why at the very least she didn’t tell me that he wasn’t the home wrecker I thought he was.

Nate turns around to walk out. “You said she would be at work,” hehuffs to Graham.

“Chill, man and sit on thefreaking couch for a minute.” Graham pushes his friend over to the sectional in our living room.

“Emma, can you and Lyn bring out some coffee please?” Grahamsweetly asks his new wife.

“We’re on it,” she says, planting a kiss on his cheek. She turns to me. “Don’t worry. We’ll be out of here in a few minutes.”

Emma pours some coffee into two cups and hands one to me.I shake my head at it. No way am I serving him. She rolls her eyes. “Follow me,” she says.

In the living room, it doesn’t escape me that Emma and Graham remain standing between the couch and the front door.Nate is sitting down looking pissed and I have no idea what to do or say.

“Sit.” Emma points to the couch.

“What? Why?” I give her my‘what-the-hell’ look.

“Lyn, sit your pretty ass down on the couch right now,” she admonishes me.

Geez. So bossy.I walk the few steps over and sit at the opposite end of the sectional from Nate. I eye Emma and Graham nervously. What is this all about?

Graham looks from Nate to me and back to Nate. He points at both of us.“You two . . . you have to work your shit out. You,”—he points to Nate—“are my best friend. And you,”—he points to me—“are Emma’s best friend. You have to learn to get along and play nice together.”

“We are tired of being in the middle,” Emma says. Then she looks at me. “Lyn, I love you and we have abided by your request not to say anything about you to Nate and about Nate to you. But it’s exhausting. We have basically been lying to you guys by withholding the facts and we’re tired of it.”

Shelooks at Nate. “And you, we haven’t said anything to Lyn about your situation because . . . well she wouldn’t let us talk about you and because it’s not our story to tell. But after your little outburst last night, you might as well get it all out there.”

Graham adds, “Quit acting like adolescents and try to be friends. For our sake. For your sake. Work it out.”

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