Page 3 of Be My Reason

I look up at Emma and see her visibly exhale the breath she was holding in. “That would be so nice of you, Nate.” She smiles. “Lyn, you okay with that?” She stares me down and I know better than to argue with that look. I begin to question whether or not her mom really has a situation.

“I guess.” I look at Nate. “Only if you’re sure. I mean, I don’t mind waiting around for Emma.” I immediately curse myself for giving him an out. Why would I want to do anything to jeopardize alone time with Nate Riley?Please say you’re sure, please say you’re sure.

“Yes, I’m sure, Brooklyn.” He smiles sincerely and now I’m both nervous and excited to spend another few hours with him.

I hug Emmagoodbye and whisper in her ear, “I will so get you back for this.” But what I really mean is, ‘Thank you.’

Shortly after Emma leaves, the party starts to get out of hand.Someone falls over and breaks a table. A few girls are getting really drunk and suggesting strip poker. I am so uncomfortable here. Why did I agree to stay without the one person who can handle all of this? I’m about to get up and use the phone to try and get Emma back here when Nate leans over and says, “Brooklyn, this is getting kind of crazy, do you want to leave and go for a drive?”

Thank you.

~~ ~

We drive aroundtown and talk for a while. I’m surprised at how much we have to talk about given we are so different. Turns out, we have the same taste in music; we both like scary movies; we both must dip our fries in a chocolate milkshake; but most importantly, we both hate Mr. Goodwin, the advanced biology teacher who never looks at you when he talks and who apparently doesn’t believe in wearing deodorant. We laugh telling stories about him and some of the other teachers that he had last year and I have this year.

He takes me for ice cream and pays.Is this a date? Then he asks if it is okay if we head down towards The Bend. The Bend is a secluded place where kids sometimes hang out late at night. It is along the Little Black River, just this side of the South Carolina border. There is a place where the river curves around like a hairpin, thus it earned the name The Bend. I’m not even sure it is officially named that or if some kids just made it up. All I know is that legendary things have happened there and I’m about to go there with none other than the gorgeous captain of the baseball team.

We pull into the small makeshift gravel lot to seethe place devoid of other cars. He looks around at the empty lot. “We can leave if you aren’t comfortable being out here alone.”

What, is he crazy? That’s why I want to stay!“No, it’s okay, we can stay.”

“Good.” He smiles. “Because I’ve been dying to kiss you all night.” He slides closer to me on the bench seat of his pickup truck. He puts a hand behind my neck and another on my knee. He slowly closes the gap between us, eyes locked onto mine and I’m certain that even in the relative darkness I can see those deep blue eyes of his burning into mine. He shifts his eyes down to see my tongue come out, wetting my lips in an invitation. I can smell him as he inches closer. He smells of clean, fresh laundry and something else that is pure Nate. My heart is pounding out of my chest and I swear I can hear the blood flowing in my ears. His hot breath mingles with mine as he draws even closer, with a slight hesitation, asking me with his eyes if he can continue on this journey.

Oh, yes, please.

I’m not sure what to do with my hands so I just let them fall onto his legs.As our lips touch for the first time, it is like magic the way they connect—like they are two parts of a puzzle finally put into place. His lips gently caress mine in a seemingly never-ending dance of soft touches before I feel his tongue glide across my bottom lip asking for me to give him more. I part my lips for him and his tongue enters my mouth, mingling with my own as heat rises through me along with a wanting that I never knew existed. He tastes of mint chocolate chip ice cream and I silently vow to never again eat any other flavor.

This, right here, is the best moment of my life.We kiss for . . . seconds? Minutes? My lips feel swollen and I struggle to get my breathing under control. I need to know what is going on in his head. I need to know what is going on inmyhead. I pull away slightly and ask, “Why haven’t you ever asked me out before?” Then I feel my face heat up. “I mean, not that this is a date.”Oh my God, now he thinks that I think this is a date.

“I’ve wanted to all year but baseball takes up so much timeand energy. I couldn’t blow my chances of getting recruited by a top school,” he explains. “But now that the season is over, I have more time to do other things and get to know other people.” He smiles down at me. “And, yes, Brooklyn, I’d say this qualifies as a date.” He squeezes my knee. “Our first date.” He looks at me sweetly.

I’m still stuck onI’ve wanted to all year. . . and then I realize he’s said we are on a date.Holy crap. A date, a first date, that implies there will be more. I want to twirl around, scream with delight and high-five someone. I catch myself looking around to see if anyone else is witness to me, Brooklyn Vaughn, ordinary band girl and baker wanna-be, on a date withtheNathan Riley.

I remember that we are alone and that I’ve just experienced what I can only describe as the best, most unbelievable, earth-shattering kiss of all time. “Okay then,” I say with a small voice because I can’t believe what I’m about to tell him. “I guess I wouldn’t mind if you did that some more.”

He smiles down at me, takes my face in his hands and kisses me again and again until I not only can’t feel my lips, but I’m pretty much sure I don’t care aboutanything except his hands on me and what I want those hands to do to me. I think back to the few kisses and over-the-clothes encounters I had with Chris Wright, the lead alto sax player in the band. Those experiences did nothing to prepare me for what I feel when Nate’s hands are on me. He pushes up my shirt a little and as he touches my side at my ribs and starts to run his hands upwards, I think I’m going to melt into a pool of hot lava if he continues what he is doing.

Please . . . please continue what you are doing.

He reaches my nothingspecial, didn’t-know-anyone-was-going-to-see-it, bra and breaks our kiss long enough to ask if he can undo it. I don’t think I can speak so I simply nod my head and reach down to help him maneuver the clip at the front.

Thank goodness it is so dark outside because I canonly picture what I must look like with my top disheveled, my bra hanging off my arms and what I can only imagine must be a look of shock on my face that he wants to do such things with me. Grateful that he leaves my top in place, because I really don’t want to look naked if someone pulls up next to us, I lean in and kiss his neck under his ear in a bold move that surprises me but feels so right. “Ah, Brooklyn, that feels so good.” I feel him shift around in the seat, trying to arrange himself in his jeans. I’m silently exploding with joy over the fact that I’m affecting him the same way he is affecting me.

His hands caress mymeager breasts. The sensation is incredible, sending waves of electricity straight to that bundle of nerves between my legs. I let out an involuntary moan of pleasure which only makes him take in a sharp breath and mutter, “Oh, God.”

He takes my hand and places it on his jeans and slowly moves it up his thigh.I can’t believe I’m doing this. I’m scared to death but relieved that he is helping me along because I’m not sure I would know what to do. In a leap of faith and certain I may die of embarrassment, I look away shyly and tell him, “Um, Nate, I haven’t done this before.”

Oh, gods of all virgins that don’t know what they are doing, strike me dead now.

He keeps his hand on top of mineand runs his other hand quickly through his hair before placing it under my chin, turning my head so that we are eye to eye. “Would it surprise you to know that I haven’t done this before either?” he says. Even through the darkness he notices the shock displayed on my face and he laughs nervously. “Well, I’ve donethisbefore.” He squeezes my hand that still rests very close to his hardness. “But I haven’t done what I think we are about to do.”

Ishut my gaping mouth and try to form another coherent sentence. “Are you sure?” I ask.Yeah, not what I was going for. God, I’m stupid.

“Am I sure I’m still a virgin, Brooklyn?” he asks with raised eyebrows.“Yes, I’m sure.”

All of a sudden the question in the back of my mind—will I or won’t I—is answered. Although I’m still nervous as hell, the fear is gone. Hearing that we could do this together, something unknown to both of us, somehow seems even more intimate and exciting.

I start to think about what we aregoing to do. Will it hurt? I wonder what I will feel like after. Will I have an orgasm and will it feel different than the ones I’ve had by myself?Oh, God, will he watch me?Will I bleed? I wish Emma had prepared me for this.

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