Page 5 of My Ex-Best Friends

“You know what I hate? When your body gaslights you. My knees hurt, yet there’s not a mark on them. If it’s going to hurt,it should show up, dammit.” I blinked back a sudden wave of emotion and dropped my head back so I was staring up at the ceiling. “I’m not going to cry. I won’t do it. I’m fine. Today was a great day. Best day ever.”

“Good to see you’re keeping your shit together.” Colt’s voice was cold but his grip on my elbow was hot as he pulled me to my feet. “Go sit down at the counter.”

Logan pointed at the stool across from where he was slicing a pizza. “How about you tell us all about it over pizza and beer?”

“I shouldn’t be here.” I rested my elbows on the counter and dropped my chin onto my fists. “I don’t know why I called you. I was an asshole and you guys have every right to hate me. Instead, I show up like I am and you have to comfort me. It’s wrong.”

“You should’ve thought of that before you came over. It’s too late now.” Colt scowled at me as he opened the fridge and grabbed out four beers. “Start talking. The least you can do is spill your guts.”

“Colt.” Noah sighed and sat down next to me. “Worry about one thing at a time. Given the wedding dress, I think that’s the more pressing matter. Did you pull a runner before or after the vows?”

I bit my lip. “Before.”

“You did the guy a favor. Now he doesn’t have to go through with annulment paperwork.” Colt put a beer down in front of me and held my gaze. “Is he crying somewhere right now?”

“Jesus, Colt.” Logan groaned. “Ease up or go away.”

I sat up straighter, feeling a flash of life as anger flared. “He was fucking my boss in our bed this morning. So, no, I don’t think he’s somewhere crying right now.”

Colt’s eyes narrowed but he didn’t say anything else. He took a long pull of his beer and walked out of the room.

“Damn, Brooke. That’s rough.” Noah hesitated and I could tell he wanted to ask something he was afraid to ask.

“Just ask whatever you want to know.”

“Did you love him? It’s just that you don’t seem as heartbroken as I’d expect.” He shrugged and gripped his beer. “What do I know, though?”

I traced the label on my bottle and stared off into space as I considered his words.DidI love Finn? I swallowed down a bad feeling and looked at the pizza Logan was hovering over. “Can I have a slice of that? I don’t think I’ve eaten in two weeks. Finn’s mom ordered that demon dress in a size down from what I needed to ‘encourage’ me to lose a few pounds.”

Logan slid me a piece on a paper plate. “Finn?”

I snorted after shoving a piece into my mouth. “Finn Love. It’s a stupid name. I would’ve been Brooke Love. I don’t know what I was thinking. Mom and Aunt Karlene didn’t even come. They hated Finn and Aunt Karlene told me that he wasn’t supposed to be my husband. She said it while doing her woo-woo head tilt thing and I just assumed she was making shit up.”

“She’s always making shit up.” Logan ate his pizza slower than I downed mine. “It’s just that sometimes she’s right.”

I finished my slice and took a long drink of my beer. I couldn’t get Noah’s question out of my head. “You want to know something really awful? I don’t know if I loved him. I’ve been chasing the worst choice available since I was old enough to wonder why I didn’t have a daddy like everyone else. I think at some point with Finn I just accepted that I was going to be with him. I wasn’t even excited about the wedding. I didn’t plan any of it. His mom did. I was just there, like a potted plant used to put the finishing touch on a staged room. Maybe I would’ve sprinted out of there no matter what happened today.”

They were quiet and I let the silence sit heavily on my shoulders. They were probably surprised that they could be more disgusted with me.

“Finn Love is a stupid fucking name.” Colt stepped back into the kitchen and grunted. “Give me a slice of that.”

Somehow, Colt broke the tension. I let out a stuttering laugh and it didn’t take long for Noah and Logan to join in. Colt even smirked and shook his head.

“Here’s to our little bunny escaping Finn Love and his mommy issues.” Logan held his beer up and grinned. “And to moving on.”

Noah held his beer out. “To moving on.”

I held mine up and took a deep breath. “To moving on.”

We all looked over at Colt and I watched his jaw work. He finally held up his beer and we tapped them together. “To moving the fuck on.”

A lightness filled my chest as hope stuck its head out from the hole it’d been hiding in. I ducked my head as I smiled and felt the pressure closing in on me loosen a bit. “Thank you.”

“Don’t thank us yet. The pizza and beer aren’t free. You owe us an explanation, little bunny.” Logan’s easy going expression was gone, replaced with something harder. “Why the fuck did you run away from us?”

“Oh, wow. We’re just going right in, huh?” I reached up and tugged at the ends of my wet hair. “Can we drink more first?”

“Nope.” Colt leaned on the counter next to me and narrowed his gaze at me. “Spill.”