Page 44 of A Dagger in the Ivy

It’s not much, but at least it’s something. He’s giving an inch, so I’ll act grateful for now and press for more later. “Thank you, Your Majesties.”

“I think it’s a good compromise,” Nadya puts in. “You’re very clever to have suggested it, Queen Eleanor.”

The queen’s lips quiver into a smile, and she inclines her head to Nadya.

I feel Nadya has sensed, as much as I have, how the king’s oppressive demeanor might affect the queen. And Nadya is nothing if not supportive of lifting up her fellow women, especially in times of need.Her compliment seems to have done the trick.

Perhaps sensing my lingering frustration, Torbin leans close, his voice a reassuring murmur. “I will keep abreast of the situation, Celeste,” he whispers, a glimmer of determination in his eyes.

I offer him a grateful nod, heartened by his support.

Dante shifts in his chair. “How refreshing that the princess, once again, gets everything she wants.” His gaze lingers for a moment before he rises abruptly, crossing the room and departing without a word.

“Ezra, I’m afraid I’m not alert enough to pay the proper attention your lessons deserve.” I push my hair away from my face, fighting off a headache. Not only am I suffering from lack of sleep, but the conversation at breakfast keeps replaying in my mind. Especially the remark Dante made. I feel bad for interrupting Ezra’s lessons on royal etiquette, but I’m not absorbing anything he’s saying.

“I understand, Your Highness.” Ezra’s lips pinch together when he realizes what he’s said. “Celeste. Would you like to get some rest?”

“Actually, I could do with some training.”

Nadya props her chin on her elbow. “I thought you said you weren’t alert. How are you going to be able to train?”

“It’s a chemical reaction,” Ezra answers for me. “The body’s system wakes up with physical activity.”

Nadya shakes her head. “That doesn’t seem to make any sense at all.”

Unable to hold myself back any longer, I rise. For the next hour, I long to act like a soldier instead of a royal.

Ezra claps the chalk dust off his hands. “What kind of training would you like to do today?”

I pull my dagger from its sheath and flip it in the air, catching it by the hilt. “Target practice.”

A few minutes later, I stand in the courtyard, in the same spot Iwatched Torbin and Dante throwing their swords my first day here. Ezra has had someone fetch a target, which is set up a few feet away, the worn bullseye pinned to a dummy made of jute-wrapped hay. I grip the hilt of my dagger, feeling the familiar weight and balance. It’s a small comfort in the chaos of my thoughts.

Under the magnolia tree, Ezra and Nadya watch. I can hear their muffled voices as they converse. The magister’s eyes are on me, assessing every throw, every movement, surely searching for any sign of weakness. Nadya, on the other hand, seems more concerned. Her eyes flick between me and the magister, her expression a mixture of worry and curiosity. She has always been the one to watch over me, to support me. I know she senses something is off, and I make a mental note to talk to her in private soon.

Blocking out their murmurs, I focus on the one thing I can control: my aim.

Though I try to suppress them, Dante’s words echo in my mind, each one a barb digging deeper.“You don’t belong here.”I release the dagger, sending it spinning through the air. It thuds into the dummy’s shoulder. Not good enough. I stomp toward the dummy and retrieve my dagger from the target, flipping it once as I head back to stand in place.

“The princess, once again, gets what she wants.”I narrow my eyes, focusing on the center of the target. The dagger flies true this time, striking closer to the bullseye. The satisfaction is fleeting, drowned out by the memory of his sneer.

Emotion is throwing me off. I grit my teeth, forcing myself to concentrate.

“Monster. You can’t change who you are.”My chest tightens. I take a deep breath, channeling the anger and hurt into my grip. The next dagger finds its mark with a satisfyingthunk, dead center. I fetch it and throw again, my arm moving with practiced precision, but my heart is anything but steady.

How can he hate me so much? The question nags at me, intertwining with my movements. I spin and release, the dagger embedding itself in the dummy’s side. I picture his face, his cold,disdainful eyes, and it fuels my determination.

I’m not a monster. I didn’t have anything to do with his mother’s death. Though I don’t agree with my father’s prejudices, I still feel the guilt of his actions. But does that mean I have to continue to pay for them? The dagger once again flies from my hand, hitting the target with a force that sends it rocking back on its stand. My breaths come faster now, each one stoking the fire of my resolve. I will not let his words define me.

For a moment, I close my eyes and breathe. The courtyard grows quiet as I stand there, my grip firm on my dagger. I feel the weight of it, the way it connects me to the ground, the air, the target. I steady my breath, calm my racing heart, and with one fluid motion, I let it fly. It strikes true, splitting the painted bullseye.

I stare at the target, chest heaving, sweat trickling down my brow. The silence that follows is heavy, but it’s a silence filled with my resolve, not Dante’s venomous words. I won’t let him belittle me. I will not be broken by his hatred. I will forge my own path, no matter what it takes.

“Quite extraordinary.” Ezra applauds, coming closer to me.

Nadya follows, her smile warm.

“You’re very skilled, Celeste,” Ezra continues. “I can see why you’ve climbed the ranks in the regiment.” His head bobbles in nods as he speaks.