Page 128 of Back to Willow

“Liam…”I need to tell him.

“We’ll work through it. I know we will. I just need you to promise one thing to me.”

“What?” I breathe.

“Don’t leave,” he whispers, his lips impossibly close. “Everything else I can handle. I can wait.”

“But—”

“Promise me,” he insists.

“I promise.”

Upon hearing that word, he kisses me fervently. The same sensations from before flow into my body and cloud my judgement.

I won’t leave him again; I know that. Going through life without him is an endless punishment that I won’t bear to go through once more. But this time around, Liam will be the one to leave.

And when it happens, my heart will be ripped right out of my chest, and there won’t be anything else left to salvage.

THIRTY-NINE

Willow

It’snerve-wracking,really.

Today is the 24thof December, which means Nana is long gone, and Liam is expecting Dylan and me to arrive at any moment. But what’s eating away at me is the fact that a couple of days ago, he was adamant to take samples for a DNA test.

Stupid me gave in, of course.How could I refuse?

But I’ve been panicking ever since.

From waking up in the middle of the night because of horrifying nightmares to being startled by a door closing and having a random panic attack. I’ve been a bloody mess.

This means I have to tell him. And I have to do it before that damn letter with the results arrives. He’s been so understanding, so loving, that it pains me. But for the life of me, how the hell do I tell him the truth?

Because of the holidays, when we went earlier in the week, they told us we would only receive the results by Tuesday the 26th. The torture.

“We’re here,” I mumble with my hands still attached to the wheel. Though, the car is already fully parked.

“We’ve been here for five minutes,” Dylan counters, some sassiness in his voice. “I’ve been talking to you, and you don’t answer.”

“Sorry. What did you say?”

“Will I have presents in his house? Can Santa find me here?”

“You know Santa can find us anywhere,” I answer. “Don’t you want to go?” He nods eagerly, satisfied by knowing Santa is an all-knowing figure.

With that, I get out of the car and round it, opening the passenger door and unbuckling him. When his feet finally settle on the ground, he holds my free hand as I lock the car with the other before we walk together to Liam’s building.

He lives in one of these fancy apartments in the higher part of the city with a beautiful view over the city centre as it lowers down towards the river. The entrance, elevators, and hallways are all squeaky clean in beige and white tones and marble floors.

“Wow,” Dylan mutters, looking around. “The ten floor? Wow!”

I chuckle at the way he says the floor wrong as the elevator doors close in front of us, and starts going up. My insides bubble with nervousness. It doesn’t matter how many times we’re together and he reassures me this is to last, my body is on edge, my nerve endings stand to attention, and the anticipation eats away at me.

Will this feeling ever change? Ease down? Probably, I hope.

Instead of having to walk down the corridor to the apartment number he had told me it was, we’re both surprised by a grinning Liam waiting for us in front of the metal doors.