Page 96 of Back to Willow

“Mummy, hurry up. Help me find what to wear.”

“So the sharks can admire how stylish you are?”

Dylan side-eyes me, a slightly confused glint swirling, but doesn’t comment on my sarcasm, digging through the drawers. We take a few minutes but decide on some jean shorts and a dark blue polo that matches his sneakers.

“I look good, Mummy,” he gloats.

“Yes, you do, baby. Let’s go eat now.” Hand in hand, we go down the stairs and find Jake already preparing breakfast with Nana as the supervisor.

“Morning, guys,” I greet them.

We both kiss their cheeks and sit down at the table while they wrap everything up. Honestly, having Jake here for an extra week has been bliss. Today, he heads home, and all I can think about is how much I’ll miss him.

The food’s ready in a couple of minutes, and we eat, with Dylan being unable to stop talking throughout the entire meal. I try to hide the anxiety of knowing that in a few minutes, the doorbell will be ringing, and Liam will be here, waiting for the both of us.

Trying to keep my mind off of it, I pout. “I wish you could stay longer.”

Jake chuckles lightly, but I can see it doesn’t really reach his eyes either. Being apart hurts us all.

“I’ll be back soon,” he tuts as we start to clear our plates.

Dylan keeps on eating, unaware of our little parallel conversation.

“Will you be alright?” my brother asks.

“I think so,” I answer honestly. “I’ve started looking for a therapist to see at least once a week. I need to learn how to cope with this. And I’m sure they’ll advise me on how to deal with this the best. I want to tell Liam everything.” I sigh. “I just don’t know how.”

“I’ve got a client whose wife runs a chain of clinics. If I’m not mistaken there is one here. I can text you the name if you want,” he suggests.

“That would be awesome. Thank you.”

He hugs me, the goodbyes already in motion. “If you ever need anything, you call me. Yeah?” I nod. “And if Liam gives you a hard time, I won’t mind coming back here just to threaten him, orshakesome sense into him.”

“Don’t be stupid,” I chastise, chuckling.

“No, but really…I am afraid that once he knows the whole story—”

Fisting my hand tightly around his shirt, I try not to give away my discomfort. “Let me deal with it. I am working on it. Once I figure out a way to tell him, I will.”

“I don’t think you’re giving him enough credit.” My brother shakes his head. “He has always been crazy about you. There is no way he’ll doubt you.”

I’m torn. There is a tiny part of me that keeps whispering to tell him, that he’ll understand. That he’ll believe me. But the other…the part that was bent and broken, made to believe that it was worthless, is very hesitant to do so.

It’s a tricky situation, where my brain keeps me running in circles. If this huge part of myself still blames me for what happened, for being there when I probably shouldn’t have been, for not being strong enough to stop it, for allowing him to do it, then, how could I not?

“I’ll figure it out,” I answer.

Jake’s expression morphs into a disapproving glare. I know he’s trying not to scowl at what I said, but that’s the truth.

“Whatever you decide,” he gives in, kissing my forehead.

It shows he’s taking what I want into consideration. It makes me wish we lived closer because we were always joined at the hip when we were kids. He even used to be jealous of Liam growing up.

“Thank you, Jay, for everything. You’re the best brother I could ever ask for.”

“I know.” He smirks and I feign an offended gasp.So full of himself.“But you are the best sister as well.”

Dylan finishes his food up, jumping straight in the middle of us, killing the sibling-love vibes—like he usually does. While Nana cleans his plate off, the dreaded bell rings, announcing Liam’s arrival.

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