Page 83 of Vitaly

His face is a blank mask, his eyes distant. I wonder for a moment if he’s here to kill me, but he steps to the side so I can pass.

I rush into the hall with Alik on my back, searching for my father, but don’t see him until I find my cell.

I nearly drop Alik.

I don’t see his face. I see his gun. His arm outstretched on the ground. His hair.

“You should stay,” Roman says, his voice ice. “You deserve to die.”

Then he leaves, his gun at his side as he stalks toward the exit not appearing to care if he lives or dies.

I walk to the cell and lower Alik before falling to my knees, tears filling my eyes. My father’s eyes are still open, and with a shaky hand, I close them.

I let out a sob while grief snakes inside my body and makes itself a home. Guilt swallows me. I’m drowning in it.

Roman is right. I deserve to die.

When I open my eyes, I slowly turn to Alik, hearing foreign voices heading this way.

I deserve to die. But Alik doesn’t.

With all the strength and the last resolve I have, I grip him beneath his arms and haul him down the hall as quickly as I can.

“Wow,”Mila says when I finish, her eyes watery.

Wow. I don’t know what that means.

When I look away, Mila brings my face back to her. She smiles at me, but it’s sad. Kind. Pitiful, maybe. I hate to be pitied, but I love her touch and find my chest loosening the longer she caresses my cheek.

She isn’t disgusted. Not at this.

“There’s more,” I say, as if I need to convince her I’m nothing. “When I was in prison, I wasn’t a good man. I did a lot of bad things. Hurt a lot of people who didn’t deserve it. Everything I touch?—”

“Shhh,” Mila says, pressing her finger to my lips. “Don’t ruin this.”

When she removes her finger, I tilt my head at her. “Don’t ruin what?”

She gives me that smile again, and this time I realize there’s no pity. Something else I don’t recognize.

“I kept wondering what happened to turn you from the boy you were into the strong, worthy man that you are,” she says, running her hand over my jaw. “I just realized nothing happened. This is who you’ve been the entire time.” She sighs and lowers her hand. When she nods, it’s almost like she’s doing it for herself, like she’s giving herself the okay to say this.

“It’s time for you to become Pakhan.”

22

MILA

Vitaly and I don’t make it out of the parking garage before Alik comes for me.

His nose is red and swollen, a thin white bandage pinching the top of it, and a bruise is already forming on his jaw. If he’s angry about it, it doesn’t show. Somehow, he looks remorseful, which for Alik is a lot. I’ve never seen him frown like this. And that can only mean one thing.

Nikita knows.

“I need to take you to the warehouse, Mila,” he says to me.

Vitaly is the one to respond, his chest puffing out at my defense. “Why?”

Alik flicks his gaze to Vitaly but addresses me. “Come on. We can’t keep Nikita waiting.”