Page 48 of The Grief We Hold

“Been thinking similar thoughts since the moment I called. Can’t explain it. I’m not a relationship guy, but I can’t stop thinking about you either. Any other woman, I’d suggest fuckingit out of our system, yet here you are, in my bed, and we’re talking.”

Images of him pulling me closer flash through my brain. Of him dominating me in the way I’ve always craved but never received. “Is that what you want to do with me?”

He pushes a lock of hair behind my ear. “You don’t strike me as a one-night-stand kind of woman, and that’s all I’m offering.”

Is that all it would be?

My treasonous reasoning fractures. A part of me wants to revel in the freedom of a no-strings moment with this man.

The other silently cries out,What if one time isn’t enough?

But it’s better than never knowing.

I don’t feel guilty about my husband. He abandoned me long before Wraith climbed into this bed. I just want to be needed by someone, even if tonight is all he needs me for. “Then teach me how to be one.”

“Not that simple, Blue. Can’t teach you how to separate sex and emotions. Only you can do that.”

“You’re confusing, Wraith. I don’t think you would have brought me here today if this were only a fleeting itch you wanted some woman to scratch.”

He tugs me closer, sliding his strong arms around me. His warmth immediately hits me, along with the scent of the soap he used during his shower. “I’m confusing myself. Not sure where the fuck I’m going with all this.”

His hand rubs tenderly up and down my spine, grounding me as I arch against him.

His body is solid, a physical anchor to my spiraling thoughts.

His cock is hard, making it impossible to separate me needs from my own self-interest.

“There are lots of reasons we shouldn’t do this,” he says. “But I can’t think of any of them right now when you feel this good in my arms.”

“I can’t pretend I wasn’t relieved and excited when you opened the door, even though I know getting involved with you is a bad idea for me and Fen.”

“What if we pretended for tonight that I’m just Axel, and you’re just Raven, and this room is anywhere but here?”

My heart beats so fast, I fear for its safety. “I’m not sure I’m mentally ready to sleep with you yet. My body’s there, but…”

“Then take whatever you need. Let me get you out of these clothes. Let me wrap myself around you and sleep with you, knowing you’re safe. Perhaps both of us will think more clearly in the morning.”

“I think I want more than that, though. Physically, I want all of you.”

He kisses my cheek gently, his breath warm against my skin. “Me too. Banging this out of our systems could be a fine idea.”

“You think that’s all this will be.”

“It’s all it can be, Blue. I need to know what it would feel like to fuck you. But, if you tell me to stop, I’ll listen.”

When he kisses me, it seals my decision. We’re both here. We’re both adults. And his kiss is so consuming it’s impossible to pull away. I feel the brush of his scruff against my skin as his firm lips torture me with the promise of everything now, and nothing tomorrow.

His hands slip beneath the hem of my borrowed Henley, and I can barely breathe. Slowly, he begins to gather fabric upwards, exposing my thighs, my butt, my ribs. By the time he grips my waist, then strokes his fingers over my skin, I’m fit to burst.

Anticipation swirls between us, an eddy current that grows with every second. Wraith never takes his eyes away from mine. Never looks down at what his actions are revealing.

My breath catches in my throat.

“You’re beautiful.” His fingers stroke softly over the area where I’m bruised, even though he can’t see the faded marks in the dark. “And I want to kill the fucker who hurt you.”

“Axel.”

My use of his name causes his pupils to flare.

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