Page 29 of A Dark Infinity

“If Nikolaos decides to change my position, it’ll affect you as well. If he demands our help, we can’t refuse.”

Lark lifts her head and cups my face, grinning mischievously. “Well, thank God you’ve claimed me.”

“Huh?”

She laughs. “It’s not like I have a choice, and I think I like that. It’s exciting, and… I don’t know, freeing. I feel like I’ve been shackled with responsibilities for so long. It’s kind of nice that I don’t have to make a decision.”

Lark

I meant what I said. It’s not logical, and I’m not sure I can explain it, other than I’m getting addicted to the ride Ethan’s taking me on. So why even contemplate ending it when I can’t, and don’t really want to?

As I sit in his lap and ponder everything he’s revealed in a very short amount of time, warmth spreads through me. It happens every time I think of his name, and it’s followed by an increasing heartbeat. Is that love? Since I’ve never been in love before, I don’t know.

One thing I know for certain; even before I knew who he really was, my stalker made me feel safe and cherished. Now that I know the lengths he’s gone to for me… ah fuck, maybe it really is love.

Ethan runs his thumb across my bottom lip. “You’re so fucking beautiful when you’re lost in thought.” He runs another finger across the space between my eyebrows. “And I fucking love the divet here when your frown.”

Am I frowning? I run my hand across the space he just touched, and yes, yes, I’m frowning.

Sighing, I say, “I need a shower and then I want to go see my dad.”

“Your dad?” Ethan says, and something about his expression makes me wary.

“Well, yes. He’s my dad,” I clarify.

Ethan nods and brushes a lock of my hair behind my ear. “You know you don’t have to worry about him anymore, right? The medical staff will take care of him. You’re free, Little Bird.”

I swallow thickly. What’s making him say those words? It’s like he knows how reluctant I am. “Why do you say that?” I ask in a whisper.

“You talk in your sleep, Little Bird,” he simply answers.

My face heats with mortification. Fuck, what have I said? “I-I…” I stop talking, grasping for any words to explain the worst. But what even is the worst? Have I planned on killing my dad in my sleep? Or said I want him dead? “What did I say? Whatever it is, I can explain,” I rush out, needing to know.

Ethan tilts my head back and his gray eyes are so piercing I’m sure he’s looking right into my soul, seeing all the ugliness I barely even admit to myself. “What are you hiding, Little Bird?” he muses. “Tell me.”

“No.” I shake my head vehemently.

“Lark,” he bites out. “I want to fucking know.”

I huff out a breath and gnaw on my bottom lip. Should I tell him? I mean, I’ve seen him kill a stranger. And the way he moved that night made it clear he wasn’t a newbie at killing. Then there’s the stuff about his family. He compared them to the Mafia, so wouldn’t that mean there’s a violent streak? Maybe he even kills for sport, or…

“How many people have you killed?” I ask. “I promise I’m not ignoring your question. But I need to know.”

Ethan’s eyes soften, and he leans in to kiss the tip of my nose. “I lost count a long time ago, Little Bird.”

I nod. “Have you killed any since the man who attacked me?”

He lifts his eyebrow; it comes across like a silent challenge. “Yes.” Gulping, I look down at my hands. My shoulders slump as I ponder how best to tell him. “Hey, none of that, Little Bird. Look at me. I want you to stare into my eyes when you give me a piece of yourself.”

“I’ve fantasized about killing my dad,” I admit, my voice barely a whisper. “Even held a pillow over his head once. I couldn’t make myself go through with it, and I’m glad I didn’t—”

Interrupting me, Ethan asks, “Are you? Tell me the truth.”

“No,” I scream, fighting to get off his lap. “Are you happy now? I’m not happy I didn’t kill him. I deserve a shot at a normal life. I deserve to be free. And he…” Sobs make me tremble, momentarily stealing my voice. “And he doesn’t deserve to suffer like that. He’s my dad, Ethan. I love him as much as I hate him.”

When I finally dare look at him and don’t see any of the disgust or reprehension I was dreading, I sigh with relief. We reach for each other at the same time, but this time he doesn’t pull me to him. Instead, he comes to me.

“Little Bird,” he rasps. “You’re so strong. So fucking strong. With me you’ll have a normal life, and you’ll definitely never be free of me. But I promise you right now that I’ll help you soar.”

---