Page 83 of From Now On

“What’d you think?” I ask.

“Taste wasn’t terrible. But consistency?” She makes a face. “Not my favorite.”

“Fair,” I tell her, pulling the plastic back over the pan.

Eve doesn’t move as I place it back in the fridge.

“I was thinking of going in the hot tub,” she says suddenly. “After I got a drink.”

Andthat’snot going to keep all my blood from heading south.

“Oh, yeah?” My voice does not sound normalat all. More like I sucked on a balloon recently.

I was still processing Eve’s revelation that she recalled our first conversation at the time, but I clearly remember her tellingAidan she didn’t pack a bathing suit. Meaning she’s intending to go in the hot tubwithoutone.

She sips some water. “Yeah. Then I can add it to my fuck-it list.”

“Yourwhatlist?” I ask, immediately intrigued by the name.

The paper sleeve on the water bottle crinkles as she plays with it. “Last semester, I wrote this senior year bucket list. Stuff I wanted to do before the end of college. After I broke up with Ben, Harlow renamed it my fuck-it list. All those things you thinkfuck itbefore doing, you know?”

“Yeah. I know.” My tone has turned husky, because I’m thinking about all thefuck itthings I’d like to do with—to—Eve.

“I’m trying to…I don’t know. Be braver, for myself. Be enough, on my own. I don’t need Ben to move to New York to move there myself. I don’t need my dad to come to graduation for it to be an accomplishment. I know that, but I’m trying to prove it. So whenever I do something that’s outside my comfort zone but I tried anyway, I cross it off my list. I added bowling.” A soft rip sounds, as she tears the paper sleeve off. “Thank you for that, by the way.”

“I didn’t do anything.”

“Yeah, you did,” she says softly.

I am so,sofucked, I realize. Fucked worse than I thought I was. It’s the same sudden jolt of shock as when I glanced back after paddling on the surfboard and realized how far from shore I was.

I’m no longer thinking about sliding my hands up Eve’s shirt or tugging her sleep shorts down.

I’m thinking about how Eve looked happier and more confident each time she picked up a bowling ball. And that I’d listen to Aidan deliberate between pretzels and potato chips for hours if it led to that outcome.

Eve drains the rest of her water bottle and tosses it in the recycling. “The hot tub is on, right?”

“Should be, but I’ll check.” I walk toward the door that leads to the patio, unlock it, and step outside. Hopefully some fresh air will clear my head. Calm down my cock.

It’s cool out, but the temperature feels much closer to spring than winter. Walking on the pavers is the worst part, since they’re chilled and hard against my bare feet. The cover is off, so it’s immediately obvious the tub is on. Steam curls into the air, creating a mist that hovers over the surface of the bubbling water. Jets are on too.

Soft steps alert me to Eve’s presence. She followed me out here.

“It’s on,” I state unnecessarily. She can see the steam too.

“I didn’t bring a bathing suit. I thought it’d be too cold to swim in the ocean and I didn’t know about the hot tub.”

I knowdoesn’t seem like the right response, so I ask, “Do you want to borrow my trunks?”

Eve laughs. The light, happy sound drifts away in the night air, dissipating the same way the rising steam is. “No, thanks. I just, um, if you wanted to go in too… Sorry. I’m making it weird. I’ve never had a guy friend. Not that I’m assuming we’re friends, but?—”

“We’re friends,” I interrupt.

Do I want more? Yes. But I’m not sure if Eve is ready for more. And I’d rather have her as a friend than revert to saying hi to her in passing once a month. I enjoy being around her. It’s never beenonlyabout attraction with Eve.

She smiles, and it’s one that has my stomach muscles clenching. Eve spins one finger. “Turn around.”

I raise an eyebrow.

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