Page 78 of Come Break My Heart Again

He’s here now with Ophelia’s wide, worried eyes following closely behind him. Guess they finally noticed our entire group left.

I stiffen, then slump, breaking eye contact first. God, he makes me so weak. I refocus on inhales and exhales because they’re still uneven and because it’s something to do.

Ryder doesn’t ask what’s wrong or what happened. He takes a seat on the step right beside me, so close that his bare arm brushes mine. I feel the spark, a jolt of electricity breaking through the crush of emotions. A point of heat to focus on as I stare down at his strong thigh pressed against mine. Keira was right—he must have worked out a lot in prison. He’s more muscular than he was in high school. And he’s soclose.

“Breathe, Lo.”

A choked gasp leaves my mouth when he uses the forgotten nickname. His palm lands on the center of my back, the warmth of it searing through the new shirt I’m wearing, and I’m suddenly suffused with heat.

“Just breathe. Deep inhales and long exhales.”

His hand moves up my spine to the back of my neck, lifting the short, sweaty strands. His palm glides down my back, then back up. It feels like each place where he touches me is unfreezing, sensation replacing numbness.

“Someone get her some water.” It’s a command, not a suggestion. There’s a flintiness to Ryder’s voice that I should flinch away from. Instead, it’s another shot of warmth.

He cares. He still cares—at least a little. There’s worry in his tone, not pity.

I’m notnormal, but I’m not totally alone either.

“I’ll get it,” Juliet volunteers.

I nod, not surprised when Ryder stays by my side. Not sure what it means when the rest of the group edges away and he still doesn’t shift. Not sure what to make of how it’s just silently understood Ryder will be the one who takes care of me. How even Juliet, who’s never encountered a situation she didn’t feel comfortable involving herself in, simply hands me a plastic cupof icy water and then continues toward the section of the parking lot where everyone else has migrated.

I gulp hasty sips of the cold liquid. I’m feeling better, but it has little to do with the water and everything to do with the circles Ryder is still rubbing on my back. I’m feelingtoo muchnow, my body betraying me once again.

“What happened, Elle?”

I deflate a little. I wanted him to call me Lo again.

“Elle?” he prompts when I don’t answer.

“Nothing happened. I just got … claustrophobic in there. Too many margaritas.” I stand, his hand falling away, relieved my legs feel somewhat steady.

Ryder stands, too, trying as hard to meet my gaze as I am to avoid his.

I’m cold again.

I clear my throat. “Thanks.”

Look at me, thanking the boy who broke my heart. I’m not sure if it’s mature or pathetic.

“Sorry to ruin your night,” I add.

Pathetic. Definitely.

Ryder tilts his head. “You didn’t ruin my night.”

Right. Of course. Ophelia is staying under the same roof tonight. If he wants to fuck her, my mini meltdown won’t stop him.

I start toward our friends without saying anything else, the crunch of gravel beneath my sneakers oddly soothing.

“Has that happened before?” Ryder catches up to me easily.

“Please drop it. I’ve humiliated myself in front of you enough.”

Too late, I realizein front of youwas unnecessary. Even if it’s accurate.

“You’ve never humiliated yourself, Elle.”

---