Page 172 of Come Break My Heart Again

“I could have written it yesterday. I wouldn’t have changed a word. Yeah, I hurt you on purpose. I wish I’d had other options, but I didn’t. I did what I thought was best for you, and you don’t get to tell me that’s wrong.Iwas the one in prison, not you. I did what I had to, to get through it, and I can’t change the past. You’re mad I never gave you a choice? You have one now. You said you’d never forgive me, and I never expected you to. But Iamin love with you.”

Elle’s inhale is loud enough that I catch it over the commotion around us.

“If you want me, I’m yours. But if you can’t get past everything that happened, if theair has been cleared—whatever the hell that means—I’ll get it. I just need you to tell me what youwantfrom me, so we can both move forward.”

At least I broke through the indifference. Shock is all I can read on Elle’s face as she stares at me.

“Elle! Oh good, I was worried I wouldn’t be able to find you up here. Keira wants to take a photo with her bridesmaids, down by the water.” Avery glances at me. Smiles. “Hey, Ryder.”

“Hey,” I reply.

Ophelia wanders over to us. “Isn’t the view up here insane?”

Knox and Reese join us a few seconds later. Knox is proudly showing off a rock he got in the gift shop.

That’s the end of our private conversation, obviously.

And I’m not sure if it’s a good or bad thing that Elle will have more time to think about everything I just said to her.

35

Iswallow the final bite of hot dog, then snuggle into the oversize sweatshirt I’m wearing. It’s chilly now that the sun has disappeared and the breeze blowing off the water isn’t tempered by its heat.

The bonfire Tucker and Bowen built to roast the hot dogs is functional, not just pretty to look at.

I remember the beauty of the blue flames from other visits. But it doesn’t compare to seeing it in person again, the flicker of aqua mixed in with orange a mystical sight.

We just got back from the pier, where we watched the fireworks. They set them off as soon as it was dark out because there’s a chance of rain later in the evening, so we waited to eat dinner until afterward.

“Can you roast me another one?”

“Yeah,” I hear Ryder reply. “You’re sure you don’t want to try?”

“I’m sure,” Knox says. “I lit the last one on fire.”

Ryder’s chuckle is low, and it wreaks havoc on my insides. I watch him out of the corner of my eye as he carefully roasts Reese’s son a hot dog, seemingly oblivious to the hero worshipbeing aimed his way. It’s obvious Knox reveres Ryder. Aside from his mom, Ryder is the one adult I’ve heard him talk to.

He’ll make a good dad.

It’s not the first time I’ve thought that about Ryder. It’s a little less scary as an adult instead of a seventeen-year-old, but not by much.

Unlike me, Ryder hasn’t bundled up. The flex of his forearm is visible in the warm glow of the fire as he rotates his arm.

I finish off the hard seltzer I’ve been sipping on and stand, planning to head up to the house to use the bathroom.

“Tuck, can you grab the s’mores stuff?” Keira asks.

“I can get it,” I volunteer. “I’m headed up to use the bathroom anyway.”

“Thanks, Elle.”

I nod, then continue walking through the sand. I attempt to brush it off my feet before climbing the deck steps, but I don’t do a great job.

Reese is standing at the island, pouring water into a glass, when I enter the kitchen.

“Hey,” I say, sending a small smile her way.

I’ve always been aware she didn’t like me. I’m no longer worried she and Ryder are in a relationship, but that doesn’t mean Reese doesn’t have feelings for him. Or maybe she just dislikes me because I’ll always be a One to her.

---