Page 7 of Quasim: King Inferno

“You gonna be on the east coast soon for the tour… I’m gonna come to the show. Me and my girls.”

He kissed me on the cheek, and I blushed. “Don’t buy a ticket, either.”

“Too late. My best friend’s husband already rented out a box for the concert… but if you wanna swing a backstage pass my way, I won’t turn it down.”

Zay smirked before licking his lips. “I can most def slide you one of those.” His phone chimed and he looked down before releasing a low groan.

“Work calls.”

“Always at the wrong fucking time, though… text me before you go to sleep.” He pushed up off his sister’s truck and looked down at me.

There was a certain weakness that a woman had when a handsome man looked down into her eyes. I felt the same way when Sim looked down at me with his intense stare that he always kept. My insides felt like jelly whenever that man stood in front of me. I wanted to say ‘yes Papi’ after everything he said.

“You gotta keep being that star… we’ll link up when we’re both back home.” I promised as I stepped into his arms, and he kissed me on the cheek.

I looked up at him, stood on my toes, and pushed my lips against his. This wasn’t the first time that we had kissed, it was the first time that I initiated it. Zay kissed me back, holding me around the waist, and pulling me into him.

As much as I wanted someone to take me to pound town, my body didn’t react to him the way that I wanted it to. Zay was attractive beyond measure; however, I didn’t get that feeling that I got with Quasim.

Fucking Quasim Inferno.

Zay kissed me once more before he walked backwards to his car. I stood with my arms folded and smiled at him, while he got in and pulled out the driveway. I couldn’t put my life on hold for one man. I knew it was my heart and my mind working against each other, because my heart wanted Sim, but my mind knew that I deserved to have someone that wouldn’t run away from me.

Zay wouldn’t run….

Quasim

I hated the fucking mornings.

Like clockwork, I heard phantom cries of Harley. No matter where I was, I could have sworn I heard my baby girl crying out for me. Soon as my feet hit the floor, I got onto my knees and surrendered to the lord, saying my morning prayers. I needed him to quiet the thoughts in my head and forgive me for all the sins that I had committed.

No sooner than I said amen, I felt like I could breathe a bit more. That he had forgiven me and was giving me this slight relief so I could go on about my day in a little less mental agony. My chest wasn’t as tight as when I woke up, or when I tossed and turned in my bed all night. Sleep never came easy, and I had grown used to not being able to sleep. Whenever sleep evaded me, I laid with my arms behind my head and stared at that ceiling, thinking of how the fuck my life turned out this way.

As I stretched, I bypassed Harley’s bedroom and looked inside like I did every morning, like I would see her in the bed with her wild, curly hair that all of us Infernos shared, including Rayce. It was crazy how those Inferno genes were.

When I stared at Rayce long enough, I saw Harley when she was a baby. Shit pulled at my heartstrings every time I picked her up, because it felt like I was holding my daughter all over again. The silence within the house haunted and soothed me all at the same time.

I should have been hearing my daughter hollering about something, Cherie complaining about me snoring the night before, and the sound of us all moving around in the morning to start the day. If I closed my eyes long enough, I felt like I could hear Cherie hollering about her flat iron not being hot enough for her thick hair.

The same morning routine I had been doing for years took place. Grab my number one dad mug that Cherie had gotten me when she found out she was pregnant, make my way to the Keurig, input the ounces, and hit the button. The mornings were like autopilot for me, and I could do it with my eyes closed.

The sound of the machine spitting coffee into my mug was the white noise of the morning while I looked at my phone and saw the ping of Blair’s anklet that I had given her.MyAnjo was important to me, and I wanted to make sure she was always protected. I never invaded her privacy, and the only reason it was alerting me was because she was on the move early in the morning, outside of her normal hours.

“Why aren’t you asleep?” I heard Blair whisper as she leaned up in the bed.

I had listened to her guzzle the water like a damn camel in the desert before she realized that I was even awake. Before she woke to quench her thirst, I stayed awake, listening to her soft snores and moans as she slept peacefully. With her so close to me, I wanted to just protect her from everything, including the unknowns. Blair was so fragile, yet mighty.

She needed me, and at the same time, I knew I needed her. She had the power to break that block of ice that resided insideof my chest. Who the fuck was I kidding? Her soft manicured hands had already started to chisel away at the ice, allowing me to breathe and feel a little more.

Feel for her.

My heart had been closed off for so long since losing Cherie and then my daughter, that the shit physically hurt to open it back up. Especially to a woman like Blair… one that had the potential to break it as quickly as she healed it.

After I lost Cherie, I swore off ever feeling something for another woman. I had lost the love of my life in the most horrific way.

Then turned around and lost my daughter, too. Feeling that pain of coming into a home without my family was something I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. Having to leave the hospital without my love was a pain I hadn’t healed from, even though I had tried.

“I never sleep at night, Anjo.” I replied, as I continued to rest on my back with my arms behind my head.

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