“Quameer… go and finish the budget because you in here tripping,” Capri snatched the phone from him while he was in the back remixing King’s lyrics to include him getting at him.

“You think he’s going to tell his brother?” I asked, still worried about what Quasim would think when I shouldn’t have been.

“So? Maybe that will put some fire under his ass to stop being so scary when it comes to you.” Capri shrugged her shoulders.

I sighed. “You know I’m not doing this to make him jealous, right? Life is short and I just want to find the one… live the life that could have been snatched from me.”

“I understand all of that, Blair. I promise I get it, but don’t you think moving on so quick?—”

“You are just as whacked out as your husband, Capri. Moving on from what? I wasn’t in a relationship, and I haven’t been for a long time. Tookie doesn’t even count, and as soon as he signs those papers, he really won’t matter.”

Capri laughed because she realized she sounded just like her husband. I knew they wanted me and Sim together more than anything, and at one point, I wanted that same thing. I had to separate myself from those feelings, because I was tired.

Tired of always feeling like I had to put the work in to get the guy. I wasn’t the perfect woman, or person. I had my own share of trauma and trust issues; however, I was a catch. I was worth the chase, worth lowering his walls down to let me in.

When Quasim lowered his walls and allowed me in, I never felt more secure. The man was everything I could have ever asked for in a man. Handsome, respectful and protective. Those were things I had never experienced in my life.

He made the little girl that was left unprotected in foster care feel seen, protected, and loved. He never had to say that he loved me, his actions showed me that he did, or maybe that was me being delusional.

Either way, in his presence I felt loved and cared for, something that I had never experienced before. It was probably why I got word vomit and ruined everything between the two of us.

“Let me get out of this parking lot and get back to work… talk to you later?”

“Yep. I love you, Blair.”

“Love you too, Pri.” We ended the call, and I tossed my phone into my purse before pulling out of the overly expensive grocery store’s parking lot.

I sat at my laptop, booking my return flight for next week, and I was excited. Too damn excited to be back home and with my people. After being gone for two months, I missed home.

I missed being in the same city as my best friends. Well, Zoya, since she lived in Brooklyn. We were forever waiting on Capri, since she had to drive from Jersey. I knew once the house was done on the compound, it would take her ass even longer to come out with us.

Either way, I was excited for my girl and couldn’t wait for the day when I left the city to become a wife and a mother. As much as I loved Brooklyn and enjoyed the city and the life that came with it, I craved the suburban life.

I listened on the phone while Capri got Ryder ready for school, and how she spoke with the people in her neighborhood. I lived for her making like she was going food shopping only to order the groceries in the parking lot and take her ass home. Capri was an amazing wife and mother, and even though shewasn’t as domestic as her sisters-in-law, Meer had dinner on the table every night. Even if it was courtesy of UberEATS.

Zay: Let me pull up on you before the studio.

My eyes roamed from my computer screen to my phone’s screen when Zay’s message popped up.

Me: I showered and washed my face already… I look a mess.

Zay: You could never.

Me: wanna bet lol

Zay: I’m trying to see you before I leave out of town. You gonna make a nigga beg?

Me: Hmm.

I smiled as I went into the bedroom and found something quick to toss on. Ivory got so many PR packages that she usually handed them over to me, so I tossed on a sweatsuit from an energy brand. Before leaving the room, I slicked back my freshly washed hair and put my glasses on to hide my lack of makeup and the dark circles that were forming from the late-night feedings.

Zay was a rapper from New York who had gotten big over the past few years. He had built his following doing mixtapes that had the city, and apparently Meer, in an uproar. The man was talented, and his lyrics made you feel his pain and the struggles he had gone through.

I think that was the reason that I related to his music. He wasn’t afraid to show that side of himself – the come up, andhow it wasn’t all beauty in the struggle. It was hard work, sacrifice, and at times, he wanted to give up and second guessed his career path.

There were only a few rappers that brought that raw edge out, and Zay happened to be one of them. He had signed a major record deal, dropped an album, and gone on tour in the same year.

We happened to meet because he was Ivory’s brother. He was visiting her when I rushed into the house with groceries and sweat pouring down my face, because I had to run after the tow truck and convince him to allow her car down.