My father tugged up his pants as he hovered over her body.
The way she’d been killed—a knife to the base of her skull—reminded me of the other wives of capos who the Rissi family had raped and killed in the past months for the petty vendetta between our families.
If it was the Rissis doing this, then why was my father standing over her…
When his crazed eyes peered over his shoulder and met mine, the paralyzing fear finally became enough to peel me from my out-of-body experience. I clawed my way from sleep as the past version of myself turned and ran.
Everything around me faded into nothing as I became aware of my body. A warm duvet surrounded my body. Sweat dripped from my forehead, and my jaw ached from the tight way my teeth clenched together.
With each second, I found myself drifting further from the memory of that night.
I forced myself to breathe in and out, counting my inhales and exhales until my heart calmed. I noticed the buzzing of my phone on my bedside table and grabbed it immediately, happy for any distraction from my shitshow of a life.
I pressed the phone to my ear without looking at the screen.
“Why didn’t you answer the first time?”
My father’s harsh tone made my heart pick up speed again. I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came.
“Useless,” he mumbled under his breath. “Come to my office. Now.”
The call ended before I could muster the courage to say even a word.
It was always like that with him. I had been willing to stand up for years. That night, my courage had come to a head, and I had finally tried to get away, but that courage diminished when he made it clear what would happen if I ever stepped out of line again.
He had his thumb on two people I wasn’t willing to sacrifice, and he knew it.
I stood from bed and stretched my back, finding that it hadn’t just been my jaw I had clenched. My entire body felt sore from my stiffened muscles, but I worked through it as I dressed in a floral sundress and tied my hair into a knot at the base of my neck.
It wasn’t up to his strict wardrobe standards, but it would have to do for now.
By the time I reached his office, I had managed to control the vicious tremors that always came alongside the dream. As I pushed through the door, I froze.
This couldn’t be happening right now.
While I had sat in the back of the funeral and watched my father deliver a speech about the “tragedy of losing loved ones to a pointless feud,” the man who now stood before my father had been sobbing in the front row.
He was the husband of the woman my father had killed, and now he looked angry and ready for vengeance. He shook my father’s hand as if they were friends.
Only I knew the truth.
I knew that the Rissis weren’t responsible for killing any of the Bianchi wives as my father had claimed.
“It’s great to hear that something will finally be done about this. There’s nobody else I’d rather be following than you, boss,” the man said.
My father nodded and gave me a stern look. “I promised it would be handled, didn’t I?” My father met my eyes from acrossthe room, and his narrowed slightly. “Go and inform the others that we’re finally on the track to justice.”
I waited for the man to leave the room, yearning to open my mouth and be honest for once. I could so easily tell him the truth. I could end this animosity between our family and the Rissis.
But I couldn’t.
I couldn’t risk it.
When the door sealed me in the room with my father, I wiped my palms on my dress to hide the apparent anxiety that wracked me.
“I’m sure you heard. There are… developments in our situation with the Rissis,” he said as he rounded his desk and dropped into his chair with a groan.
I wondered if all the lying and deceiving wore on his body the same way it wore on mine.