Page 71 of Knot Just for Show

Inside of another breath—his hands are in my hair—crawling over my body.

Someone must yell at him for using his hands because he stops abruptly—as if remembering himself—relinquishing his hold on me as if I were a red hot tea-kettle, his tongue withdrawing reluctantly from my mouth before he grudgingly breaks the kiss.

I swallow down a big breath, waiting until a production assistant taps my shoulder before I remove my blindfold and headphones.

“Alright Ursula, how was that?” Anna beams, her plastic smile dazzling in the bright sunlight.

“I’m not sure if I got all that the first time, can we do it again?” I bat my lashes innocently, playing to the obvious feeling joke.

Anna and the rest of the attending Pack Milton reward me with sunny for-television laughter.

“Funny girl.” Paul elbows Teddy conspiratorially before turning back to face me. “But you’ll have to rate each kiss to find out who gets those first individual dates.”

I squirm under everyone’s eyes as Anna reveals a large wooden display with different numbered tiles and hooks. Next to each numbered tile is an empty hook. I catch sight of a stack ofnumbered tiles with holes punched in the top in her manicured hands and know what’s coming next.

“You’re going to rate each kiss on a scale of one to ten, starting with kiss number one!” Anna exclaims, handing me the numbered tiles gleefully.

“This is so hard—what if all of these guys are tens?” I laugh uneasily, the hard plastic cards clacking softly in my hands.

“You can’t give everyone a 10,” Anna grits through her teeth, more obviously losing her patience with each new interruption or challenge to her edict.

I nod anxiously and turn back to the boys.

“Starting with kiss number one,” Anna prompts me again, and I am forced to hang the relevant number beside the big rectangular tile labeled ‘Kiss #1.’ I can see that there’s another tile hanging behind it…the identity of the kisser, ready to be revealed as soon as I’ve made my ratings, no doubt.

I take a deep breath and hang a number ‘8’ beside the first kisser.

“Alright Ursula, you know what to do!” Anna prompted me to go down the line.

I give ‘Kiss #2’ a 9.

“What made kiss number two a nine for you?” Anna swoops in, hardly giving me a moment to think.

“Uhh-well, I don’t know—it was just a little more…” I make my hands into fists and make a little grunt before I can think better of it.

Anna and pack Milton laugh—but the guys look like they’re sweating a little.

“You know what we’re going to ask about number three.” Anna taunts, and I hesitate before I hang up the number 7.5.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Lysander wince—and my heart aches for him.

I hate the stupid show for making me do this dumb exercise. I hate myself for playing along with them instead of just rating the guys highly across the board and refusing to take the bait.

But since I’m in this deep…

I mark ‘Kiss #4’ as 9.5.

“Woah, that’s some pretty high praise right there. Almost a ten!” Anna clicks her tongue. “Did kiss number four have that—” Anna does a less than kind imitation of my earlier fists-and-grunt gesture, and I want to sublimate into the ether.

Instead of answering, I figure it best to get the last of it out of the way. Next to ‘Kiss #5’ I hang the gold star. A perfect 10.

“Well there you have it! That’s a pretty definitive winner right there!” Paul claps happily, making his way over to the board to remove the ‘Kiss #’ tiles—revealing the names beneath.

In last place, with a score of 7.5 is Lysander. While I’m sure his pride is scuffed, likely no one is surprised he’s placed last in this proverbial race. In fourth, with a score of 8, is Ronan—who seems more than a little surprised that he didn’t clinch the number one spot—though he seems to be taking it in stride.

In third place, with a score of 8.5 is Mavren—who looks pleased to have scored in the middle of the pack, rather than first or last.

In second place, Teddy is distinctly pouty. While any of the others would have undoubtedly been pleased with second place—Teddy Wong clearly considers it as good as last, his pride clearly wounded.

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