Page 53 of Knot Just for Show

I also have several matches, so I kind of get what Teddy’s trying to say, but at the same time…no one has asked him why he’s choosing Ursula, or to commit to her right now…so I’m immediately suspicious.

Again, Lysander, as if he’s read my mind—or he’s simply unable to apply a ‘filter’ to his own thoughts—speaks, irritation clear in his voice, “No one was asking you to pick a partner or anything—we were just asking what you like about her,” he saysflatly, his chocolate brown eyes fixed severely on Teddy with a decidedly chilly air.

“Yeah—no I got you.” Teddy shifts uncomfortably, his laugh thin and uneasy before he adds, “I mean, I don’t have any great fancy way to say it like some of you guys, but yeah—I guess I’ve never ever had to try to impress a girl before, y’know?” Teddy smiles, and I can tell that he’s embarrassed to continue his admission, but he does so anyway—leaving his pride at the door. “It might make me sound like an asshole, but usually I have like—less than zero problems getting women interested because…well.” He flashes his towel open—revealing his rippling muscles and smooth tanned skin; all the while showcasing his grin of snowy white teeth, his dark almond-shaped eyes, warm and wet above his high, sculpted cheekbones.

“Yeah, you’re a babe—we get it,” Ronan laughs knocking back a swig of his drink.

Teddy has the grace to blush slightly, pulling his towel tightly around himself before he begins again.

“But Ursula can’t see me—and she’s definitely high quality, so…” He shrugs, turning away from all of us to gaze out over the city skyline. “She kind of blew me off, and I guess at first I was just trying to prove that I’ve got other stuff going on.” Teddy turns back to face us all once more. “I guess, in the process of trying to prove to her that I was worthy of her time, she made me second guess whether or not I am worth her time—but like, in a good way?” His dark brows knit together and I can tell he’s trying so hard that I jump in to throw him a lifeline.

“I get it dude, and for what it’s worth? I think you could be worth her time, especially if you’re thinking about her, about your pack—not just yourself.”

The rest of the guys offer silent nods of ascent.

Perhaps Teddy is the one in the hot seat right now, but I’m sure that I’ll find myself in his shoes before this evening is over—let alone before the reveal. I can only hope that when my time comes—my fellow potential packmates are just as generous.

Chapter Eighteen

Lysander

Everything has been unexpectedly…intense after meeting my other prospective packmates last night.

I hadn’t been lying when I had told Ursula about my own somewhat distant experiences with my own sexuality in the past. In fact, when she’d explained the term demisexual—it was as ifa light bulb had gone off in the darkest reaches of my brain. I haven’t found a way to ‘turn it off’; the ‘eureka’ bulb's light casting a new illumination upon everything it touches.

Last night, after several hours of roughhousing in the shallow end of the swimming pool, talking endlessly about anime, golden era kung-fu movies and Hong Kong cinema at large, competing in little games of one-upmanship—gymnastic elements, demanding dance steps, and other small displays of our athletic prowess; Teddy tackled me to the couch inside—the weight of his muscular frame a simultaneously soothing and exhilarating pressure.

“C’mon Sandy,” Teddy taunted—the juicy satsuma notes of his alpha scent mingled with his breath, warm, laced with the mango spritzer and tang of alcohol so close to my face I couldn’t avoid breathing him in. “Get outta this one!” he growls playfully—his alpha aura incredibly powerful compared to even that of Mavren—seated on the opposite side of the couch with Ronan—the two of them laughing at us along with Ash—perched on the arm of the sofa as Teddy flattened himself against me.

I had nearly panicked when I felt my heart drumming wildly in my chest, my cock stiffening against the soft cotton of my sweats; adrenaline allowing me the momentary added strength to buck Teddy off of me—scrambling on my hands and knees for the far end of the massive sectional; grabbing two large cushions as if I meant to fend Teddy off, when my main concern was hiding my increasingly enthusiastic erection.

I had begged off any further roughhousing—citing a bit of athletically induced asthma that I ‘thought I outgrew in high school,’ but it had been a near thing. Thank god Ash had suggested that we play a round of Mega Thrash Brothers—giving me enough time and distraction to cool off.

All the while, Ronan fixed me with a mischievous, knowing look.

Those quartz, pebble eyes of his had sparked something within me when he introduced himself by the pool—Ronan, little seal. I’d looked at the small puddle of water he stood in—his feet; salt white and smattered with freckles—the water beading at his delicate ankles, and had a little laugh.

As we’d talked about some of his favorite painters—those eyes, that clever sparkle like silver starshine while he lavished praise on Jacob van Walscapelle’s florals. Unbidden, I had begun to imagine Ronan—his brilliant red hair nearly the same fiery vermillion and orange of the Day lilies in Van Walscapelle’s ‘Flowers in a Glass Vase;’ posed nude on a velvet divan beside the floral arrangement from the Dutch masters piece.

I had shaken it off—Mavren saving me from holding up my end of the conversation by whisking Ronan away to help him assemble our midnight snack.

Thank goodness Mavren hadn’t stopped to chat too long or with much detail—lest I suddenly discover just how accurate Ursula’s assessment of ‘demisexual’ had truly been.

It was somewhat startling—both sudden lightning strikes of desire as potent as they were unexpected.

Sleep had evaded me for the better part of the night afterward—my body restless, my mind racing; a world of possibilities and probabilities opening themselves to me.

I dragged myself out of bed and slunk down to the pool area early this morning to do laps just hoping that Ronan might be enjoying some time outdoors, or that Teddy might show up once the sun rose to do his own mile freestyle or just to sun himself like some bronzed god until it was time for his dates.

In actuality, I ended up swimming almost two miles before I decided no one was going to show. Disappointed, yet oddly relieved—I hauled myself out of the water and slunk off to the communal baths to get showered and changed before I went to get some breakfast.

Now, alone in the water slicked mosaic tile of the huge open shower in the pack lounge bathroom—I find myself leaning into the fantasy; Teddy and I—rough housing, our hands wandering; those dexterous fingers with their ropey tendons and calloused palms gripping my hard cock; my fingertips on the hard rippling of his abdominal muscles—his knot against my lips as he pushes toward the back of my throat; an unseen Ursula riding my hard length while Teddy fucks my face; Ronan stroking his hard cock as he watches us—his gray crystal gaze locked on me; dissolving with pleasure.

I’m leaning up against the tile wall—my forehead pressed into the bend of my elbow as I stroke myself hard and fast—the warm water cascading over the crown of my head, down my neck—between my shoulder blades as my breath hitches on the precipice of orgasm.

I almost jump when I hear the softthunkof the glass door closing behind me—my heart suddenly in my throat—my hand jerking to a sudden stop as I freeze with panic.

“Hey there, mind a little company?” Ronan’s voice, slow and syrupy, drips with want.

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