Page 120 of Love Me Fearless

Louisa waves me off. “No need. We’ve got a system going.”

I glance at Hutch, who shrugs. “Okay, we’ll be back tomorrow.”

Louisa flashes Hutch a stern glance, and I see the change in his eyes.

My stomach drops.

Beth stays focused on hulling the berries, almost like she doesn’t want to look at either of us.

Once we’re in the truck, Hutch tugs me close. I try to ground myself in his warmth and the purr of the sturdy old engine, in the verdant green of the trees lining the roads, but my fears creep in one by one.

That look Louisa gave Hutch in the kitchen and the way Beth wouldn’t glance our way carried a message, and by the time we pull into my driveway, I’m pretty sure I know what it is.

Hutch turns off the engine and jumps down.

I feel wooden and stiff and like I’ve lost all feeling in my body. The tears come, making my nose sting and my throat clamp shut.

When he opens my door, I can’t seem to move. “When?” I say, swatting my cheeks.

Confusion fills his eyes, and then it must register, because his expression softens. “Can we go inside?”

A little corner of my heart breaks into little pieces. I cover my face so he can’t see me shatter.

“Come here,” he says, and scoops me into his arms.

“No!” I cry out, trying to squirm free. “If you’re going, just go already!”

“Ava.” His tone is firm but patient.

I gulp a breath and tell myself that him leaving right now isn’t really what I want. That’s just a defense mechanism to keep this from hurting so much.

But there’s no escaping how hard this is going to break me.

I have to face it—with him or without. “Okay,” I manage.

He lifts me into his arms and I wrap myself around him, burying my face in his shoulder as the sobs rattle my body. I don’t want to need him like this, but I do.

Hutch has filled a part of me that’s been empty. A place I’ve never let anyone see. And now that he’s swallowed up that lonely place, filled it with his warmth and patience and his incredible kindness and that sexy, irresistible focus, he’s going to take it all away.

I should have listened to my heart and kept him out.

Hutch carries me to my bedroom and sits on the edge of the bed. He strokes my hair and up and down my back, holding me until my breaths slow and my tears fade.

When I finally lean back, it hurts so much to look at him that I blink back fresh tears.

His eyes are glassy but his jaw is set in determination. “I have orders to return by Sunday.”

I suck in a sob.Sunday!I want to cry.That’s in two days!

“I was going to tell you last night,” he says, his face twisting with emotion.

“It’s okay,” I say, swiping at the tears I can’t seem to turn off.

“I love you, Ava,” he says.

A sharp heat cracks open inside me. “What?” I shake my head. “Don’t! Don’t you dare!”

He cradles my face, locking eyes with me. “I don’t say it to hurt you.”

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