Page 4 of Compelling Urges

Ivy’s personal taste in art was eclectic, but when she discovered a young man from Redondo Beach who specialized in surfing art, she thought she’d struck gold. The guy was a genius with a paintbrush, and she couldn’t wait to make a killing with his gorgeous work. There were many professionals in San Diego County who loved to surf. With that in mind, she organized a show for him as quickly as possible and promoted it heavily throughout the area.

Normally, her buyers were older, well-heeled couples, but this time the art opening attracted a younger crowd. The paintings were relatively reasonable in price due to the artist’s lack of reputation, so sales that night were brisk. She knew it was just a matter of time before the value of his work skyrocketed, and she was ready to plan the next exhibit for him then.

Ivy and her assistant kept busy throughout the opening party with sale after sale, but one buyer made her stop and stare for longer than was polite. A tall, beautifully built young man about her age stood grinning at her as he produced his credit card to buy the largest, most expensive painting in the show. He had a shock of thick, sun-streaked golden hair, a naughty smile, and sparkling hazel eyes. The cleft in his chin made her want to nibble his face, and that thought made her blush to the roots of her ebony hair. The name on the card he produced was Bodhi Monaghan.

Noticing the blush as well as her incredible beauty, Bodhi asked her, “Where have you been all my life? Please make me a happy man and let me take you out for a late dinner when you’re done here.” His voice was deep and felt like a caress to her ears.

Stammering, Ivy answered, “Uh…absolutely.” She shocked herself with her quick reply, but this guy was definitely something special. She couldn’t remember ever being so attracted to anyone… ever.

Ivy tried to play it cool over the next few weeks with Bodhi, but their physical need for each other was off the charts. She began spending more and more nights at his place rather than at her little apartment in nearby Solana Beach, and she knew after a few short months that she was deeply in love with him. He was smart, generous, funny, and as sexy a man as she’d ever encountered.

There were only two things that kept life with Bodhi from being perfect. The first was his housemate Cooper. The first time Ivy met him, the same visceral feeling of attraction barreled through her that she’d felt for Bodhi. It worried her.How can I be so attracted to two men at the same time? Am I kidding myself about my feelings for Bodhi?she wondered, but then she tried to boot the attraction out of her mind. The second hitch in her happiness came from Bodhi himself. Ivy had strong feelings for him—feelings that she was ready to express. One night, after he’d been exceptionally attentive and careful with their lovemaking, Ivy decided it was time. He’d blown her mind and her heart simultaneously, and she had every reason to think he felt the same way about her.

“Bodhi?” she asked softly.

“Hmm?” he purred into her neck as he caressed her bottom.

“I love you.”

No sooner were the words out of her mouth than she wanted to haul them back in with heavy-loading equipment and a giant memory-erasing spell. She felt his body stiffen and he cleared his throat.

Nothing came out of Bodhi’s mouth for a while. Long enough, in fact, that she tried to convince herself he hadn’t heard her. Then he asked, “Want something to drink? I’m thirsty.” When she shook her head, he leapt up and sprinted to the kitchen. He apparently needed fresh-squeezed orange juice or something equally labor-intensive because he didn’t come back for a solid fifteen minutes. When he did, he asked her, “Want to watch a movie?” Apparently, that was the end of the “feelings” discussion.

And then a few months after that, Bodhi disappeared from her life as though she’d meant nothing. The pain devastated her.

∞∞∞

Now a year later, Ivy definitely loved Cooper, but she also couldn’t deny some leftover feelings toward Bodhi. Marrying Cooper and establishing a happy life with him seemed the best course of action—one that would erase those lingering cravings for a man who’d forsaken her. When Cooper proposed, Ivy took her feelings for Bodhi and locked them securely away in a vault somewhere in the back of her brain. She wanted to move forward with her life rather than wallow in what might have been. Bodhi had hurt her, and there was no turning back.

Chapter 4

Bodhi Monaghan was a brilliant financier, especially for a young man of only twenty-nine. He’d gone to work for a boutique investment company that acknowledged his incredible talents within a couple of years and offered him the chance to go to London where he could head up their office there. Their offer felt more like an order, but he decided it was an amazing opportunity for him, and he was flattered by the idea of the increased responsibility. He convinced himself that his career advancement ought to be the most important thing in his life.

Unfortunately,heshould have given more consideration to his relationship with Ivy Chambers—the woman he’d met in an art gallery she owned in Del Mar. Her shapely little body made his blood boil. He loved to wrap her magnificent black waves around his fist as he made insatiable love to her. Her enormous brown eyes, so dark they appeared almost black, seemed to see into his very soul, and he often found himself lost in them. Ivy’s fiery spirit attracted him to her like no woman ever had, and the feelings he had forher shook him to the core. Beyond the immense physical attraction he felt, he also recognized that she was a shrewd businesswoman with a quick mind that he respected tremendously.

He just wasn’t ready for a serious relationship, no matter how hard he’d fallen for her.

The prospect of moving to London didn’t leave him with too many doubts—at least at first. He reasoned to himself that Ivy would get over him in time. He had to kid himself about his feelings for her so that he could make a clean break. The pain of leaving her cut him like a knife, but he tried to convince himself he was doing them both a favor. He knew it was a dick move to leave without saying a proper goodbye. But London was happening either way. The breakup was happening either way. He might as well not add pain to the process too. He thought that if he told himself over and over that he’d done the right thing, it would become the truth.

Bodhi also felt terrible about leaving Cooper behind. He had always enjoyed the heck out of Cooper’s company, but once they were both living in the ocean view house, their friendship grew even stronger.

Over time, however, Bodhi realized he was feeling things for Cooper that were unfamiliar. Even though it did nothing to diminish his attraction to Ivy, Bodhi was aware he felt a longing he’d never felt before. It freaked him the fuck out. It was just one more good reason to skedaddle off to England as far as he was concerned.

Bodhi may have been brilliant when it came to business, but when it came to his personal matters, he was starting to realize that he was still immature and confused. His actions had hurt two people he cared about deeply. Even all the way in London, he couldn’t seem to escape the guilt.

∞∞∞

Bodhi’s plane to Los Angeles got in early. He was jetlagged and exhausted by the time he finally landed, but going through customs went faster than usual, so he was able to jump on an earlier connection to San Diego and not wait around the LA airport for hours. Grabbing an Uber, he headed north, barely able to keep his eyes open. He imagined the feel of the smooth sheets in his old bed. I’m so glad to be back, he thought to himself as he drew in deep gulps of ocean air. It smelled like home.

The traffic wasn’t too crazy since it was Sunday morning, so they made good time as they headed north to the seaside town of Del Mar.

“Are you a race fan?” asked the driver.

“Huh?” Bodhi didn’t feel like talking, and his head had begun to throb.

“The Del Mar race track. I thought maybe since you live there, you like to play the ponies.”

“Oh… no, not particularly.” Bodhi closed his eyes. “If you don’t mind, I’m going to take a nap.” Bodhi adored going to the track during race season, but he absolutely didn’t want to get into a conversation about it with this guy. He’d even toyed with the idea of buying some racehorses someday, although he knew he needed to do a lot of research before taking on that venture.

---