Page 22 of Compelling Urges

She narrowed her eyes at him and hissed out venomously, “It’s because of that fat little… ethnic woman, isn’t it?”

“What fat ethnic woman are you talking about?” He was completely befuddled and once again shocked by her violent mood change.

“I see you ogling her when you think I’m not paying attention.” She sniffed. “She’s an engaged woman, darling. Not exactly someone to pine after.”

“You’re talking about Ivy?” he spluttered. “First of all, she’s not fat, she’s perfect. Second of all, what ethnic group do you think she belongs to that deserves your derision?” He raised his hand and amended his question. “No, don’t answer that because thereisn’tone! And furthermore, my feelings for her are none of your business, so shut the fuck up about her.”

Blair seemed to swoon again and announced, “I need to go lie down.”

Bodhi shook his head and clenched and unclenched his hands a few times. He was a mess. This woman had the power to make him nuts just by looking at him sometimes, but the vitriol and crazy shit that poured out of her mouth made his blood boil. He finally looked at her defeated face and tried to soften his emotions.

“Look, Blair, I’m okay that it’s not a boy. I’d never hold that against you, for Chrissake. That’s just ridiculous. And I just got some good news.” He smiled at her encouragingly. “Ivy called and she knows of a great guest house in Rancho Santa Fe we could rent for you. It’s beautiful out there—nice and quiet and away from the damp beach air that might make things mold. It sounds perfect. I’ll have to call her back and get more details, but how about if we go see it tomorrow? It’ll give you a chance to relax for the rest of today. You look like you could use it.”

Her head snapped up and she glared at him. “Are you saying I look awful?”

“No, of course not. You’re as beautiful as always,” he said dismissively. “Have you had anything to eat? I can make you some soup and a sandwich and then you can take a nap. Sound good?”

“Oh, thank you, darling. Maybe just a little soup? I’ll be in my room.” With that, she disappeared back into the house, looking a bit unsteady on her feet.

Bodhi thought it a bit odd that she hadn’t asked how he was feeling after his dramatic illness earlier that morning, but maybe it was obvious to her. He went in to make some food. As he prepared the late lunch for them, visions of a little blonde girl in a tutu skipping off to ballet class filled his head. He knew there was still the possibility of surfing with a daughter, and that sounded like fun, but there might also be tea parties and teddy bears. The dinosaur mobile was instantly replaced in his head with unicorns and sparkles. He smiled to himself as he stirred the pot. This would be great, and he knew he could be a terrific daddy. A daughter! The golden retriever still sounded good too. Every little girl needed a pet to cuddle and love.

He brought a tray into Blair’s room a few minutes later and found her sleeping. Softly, he called out to her, “Blair? I brought you the soup. It’s warm, so you’ll want to eat it before it cools. I’ll just leave it here on the bedside table, and I’ll come to get your dishes in a little while.”

She sat up groggily and looked at the tray with as much interest as she’d have had if it held a bowl of sand. “Thanks,” she mumbled.

Bodhi had just exited the door when a thought struck him. “Hey, Blair, did you get another ultrasound photo today?” He turned back toward her with a hopeful expression and realized she had lain back down. She’d turned away from the food.

“No ultrasound today,” she muttered weakly. “Going back to sleep now.”

Bodhi sighed with disappointment and went to get a bit of work done. It wasn’t until many hours later that it dawned on him to wonder just how Blair had found out she wasn’t having a boy.

∞∞∞

When Cooper and Ivy arrived home that evening, Bodhi was encouraged to see that Blair had not only roused herself from bed for once, she managed to help set the table and was moderately cordial to everyone throughout the dinner they all had together. Bodhi felt his senses on high alert the entire time, however, hoping and praying that she wouldn’t go off like a Roman candle at something ridiculous. He also noticed that she didn’t eat much of the delicious pasta dish that Ivy had put together for them. She ate a few nibbles of salad and seemed to push the pasta around her plate while rolling her eyes at Ivy each time the woman had a bite of food.Oh well, he thought.At least she’s not saying anything derogatory for once.

Ivy had a lot to say about the guest house in Rancho Santa Fe, and she delivered the information with enthusiasm. “The residents of the estate only live there half of the time, and they built the guest house for the wife’s widowed mother to move into. The mother decided to move to Argentina instead because she’s reconnected with an old friend who convinced her that was the place for both of them to be.” Ivy shrugged and laughed softly. “Take a look at these photos of the cottage my friend Casey sent me.” Smiling, she passed her phone around so everyone could admire the place.

Blair was polite, though not overly enthusiastic. It grated on Bodhi that Blair never once even thanked Ivy for the effort she’d gone to on her behalf. Sighing inwardly, he realized he was expecting too much from a woman who thought about no one but herself. He wondered, not for the first time, if he was doing the right thing by taking care of someone he didn’t like and barely knew, but if it was true that the baby she carried was his, he felt he had no choice. Each time he’d tried to press her for information about her family, she clammed up or changed the subject. Apparently, there would be no assistance from them.

He wished he could at least remember having sex with Blair. It seemed so strange to have such a clouded memory of that night. He guessed exhaustion could do that to a person. There was certainly no way to prove he hadn’t fucked her. Eventually the paternity test would let him know. But in all honesty, the thought of being a dad was so appealing he wasn’t sure he’d even go through with having the test done. Someone had to be a dad to the kid. At least I have a while to decide and get used to the idea, he reasoned with himself.

As soon as the dinner was over, Blair left without a word and headed to her room. Bodhi assumed she was exhausted again. He was just as happy when he, Cooper, and Ivy picked out a movie to watch together. He knew it wouldn’t lead to sexy times for them, but the closeness of their company warmed his heart.Soon, he thought,we can be together again without worrying about Blair in the next room.

Chapter 18

Early the next morning before anyone in the house had woken up, Bodhi was roused from sleep by the doorbell. He dragged himself off the couch, wrapped his blanket around his semi-dressed body, and was startled by the sight of two uniformed police officers at the door.

“Can I help you?” he asked in a froggy, early-morning voice as he squinted at them.

“Sorry to bother you so early, sir,” one officer said. “Are you Bodhi Monaghan?”

“I am. What’s going on?”

“May we come in, sir? We have some rather disturbing news for you,” the other policeman said.

“Um… sure. Let me just get rid of this, and um…” he picked up his pillow and his pants and shirt from where he’d draped them over the arm of the couch. “Please have a seat, and I’ll be right back.” Bodhi dashed into the hall bathroom and reappeared a few minutes later with his clothes on this time.No one wants to talk to the police in their underwear, he reasoned.

Just then, Cooper wandered down the hall looking mussed from sleep and curious about the doorbell. He’d gotten dressed too, Bodhi noted—pantsanda shirt for once.

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