Page 31 of Tastes of Him

Rod let out a muffled sound, and for a moment, I worried that he would pull away. Those worries turned out to be unfounded when his hold shifted, and both of his hands cupped my cheeks. I had thought that the intensity of our kisses was due to us being alone away from the rest of the world, but that same heat swelled again inside my chest. I parted my lips on a groan that was swallowed by his mouth. Not throwing my arms around him wasn’t an option, and I gripped him tightly, not letting an inch between us.

I had missed this, the sweet, drugging kisses that made me want to fall between the sheets and forget the rest of the world existed for a little while longer. No one else made me feel this way, and that was what scared me. Rod’s tongue curled around mine, and I shivered at the feeling. It reminded me of how we moved together only days ago, and I was eager to feel that again, if only to stop myself from thinking about what it all meant.

“Sean…” Rod groaned against my lips. “The party.”

I smirked and pushed him back toward the half-bathroom that I hoped was empty. “We can make it quick.”

Rod blessedly dropped the subject of my odd behavior, and I let myself get lost in the kisses that I knew I would never recover from.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Roderick

Exhaustion was the name of the game tonight, and I groaned as I dropped down onto my couch. Life had kicked into overdrive with the new work hours and reacclimating to being home. My parents were great, but mom was still of the mind that I was going to waste away with my hours and insisted on bringing over more food each week than I could conceivably finish myself. It was helpful to not have to worry about cooking, but it was also a bit embarrassing to let some of the nurses at work know that my mom was essentially packing my lunches again.

Then there was Sean.

I had worried that coming back would make things weird between us, not to say that things were normal. Part of the awkwardness was probably from being around each other more often now. I tried to stop by the café a couple times a week when I could drag my tired ass over to see them. Cameran always greeted me in her usual effervescent way, and for a while, Sean was not as outwardly enthusiastic, but the small smiles he gave me were reassuring that he was still clearly happy for me to be there. Lately, though, he had been far more subdued than usual. Asking if he was okay had gotten me nowhere, and the times I invited him over with the intention of actually talking had only resulted in mutually enjoyable orgasms but little to no actual conversation. I knew something had to change.

My phone pinged, and with a groan, I shifted to pull it from my pocket. I frowned when I saw it was Kevin. He was another problem I needed to handle. I had hoped introducing him to some friends would help him branch out and naturally move away from me, but he was calling me more than ever. When I talked to Brody last week, he had told me to just bluntly shoot him down, even if it hurt his feelings, and while I had originally hoped to avoid that, now it seemed like a necessary evil.

What are you up to? Want to have dinner?

I shook my head, not wanting to respond, but I couldn’t deal with having multiple stresses going on forever. I needed to get Kevin off my damn back so I could focus on figuring out what was going on with Sean. The few times Kevin had joined me at the café had been far from enjoyable, and I had taken to not telling him at all that I was going. Being around him was like having saran wrap stuck to you. It was becoming a very uncomfortable feeling, and clearly, subtlety was not working.

Sure. Come on over. Mom left me some food and there’s plenty to share.

Great! Be there in 10.

I hauled my ass up off the couch, threw some water on my face, and changed out of my scrubs just in time to hear the doorbell ring. When I opened it, Kevin was standing there with a bottle of wine, and immediately, my heart sank. For a moment, I thought about just doing it here on the porch and getting it all over with, but that didn’t seem fair. We were still friends even though I needed him to dial it back.

“Hey, come on in.” I stepped back to let him inside and hoped that I could get this done as painlessly as possible.

“Thanks, Roddie. I brought you a little housewarming gift.”

“Oh, you didn’t have to do that.” I took the bottle with a half-smile and waved him into the kitchen and adjoining dining room. “But thank you. Feel free to take a seat. I’ll heat up the food, and then we can eat.”

It was quiet as I opened the bottle and heated up some leftovers. Kevin sat at the table, and I could feel his eyes on me, but I focused on thinking of the best words to use to not hurt his feelings too much. When I set a plate and glass in front of him, he brushed the back of my hand. I pulled away, hurrying back to the kitchen to grab my own food.

After sitting down, the silence seemed to stretch until I thought it might break. It was the opposite of my times with Sean where the conversation flowed easily. The push and pull of our personalities had always made even the simplest of things fun, and that dynamic in bed always left me reeling with a shit-eating grin on my face.

“What are you thinking about?”

I looked up at Kevin and realized I had been smiling at my thoughts of Sean. They weren’t thoughts I wanted to share with him, but maybe they would get him to realize my feelings lay elsewhere.

“Just thinking about something Sean said.”

Kevin’s smile dipped down a little. “Oh. Your sister’s friend?”

“Yes, and mine.” I chewed my food as I thought about how to bring things up. “He and I have…a thing going on. It’s good.”

He clenched his jaw and looked down at his plate. “Is it… I mean, you can have more than one thing. You don’t have to try to settle down so quickly.”

Trying to be as gentle as I could, I shook my head. “Some people can date around, and that works for them. Me, though, I’m a one-person kind of guy. I can’t open one door unless I close the last one, and Sean is a door I want to stay wide open.”

Kevin looked up at me with a watery smile. “I had hoped maybe you and I could try things out again. We both were coming here…” He trailed off when I shook my head again.

“I’m sorry, Kevin. I really do value you as a friend,” I replied softly. “But this thing with Sean started years ago, and it’s part of the reason I came home. He’s it for me.”

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