Page 44 of Whispers in the Dark

“Hi, my love,” I crooned, releasing the lock on the door and sticking my hand in to pet him. The dog attempted to get up, but I shook my head.

“No, baby. You need to stay down. I’m here. I can pet you just like this. You scared me you big goof. It was not a nice thing to do to chew on a bad plant.”

Leaning down, I kissed his head, whispering how much I loved him. I loved on him for several minutes, repeating again and again that I would be back in the morning to take him home. I could tell whatever meds they had Lug Nut on were making him very drowsy. Now would be a good time for me to slip out.

His snores were soft when I locked the kennel again and took a step back. This treatment and overnight stay were costing me an arm and a leg, but he was worth every penny. Not only was he a tie to my sister, but he had turned out to be my soul dog. I would do whatever it took to make sure he was well and healthy.

After completing some paperwork and arranging a pick up time for the next day, which was, ironically, New Year’s Day, I made my way back to my car, leaving a piece of my heart in the clinic. I had quizzed the doctor repeatedly about whether or not there was a risk of my dog taking a bad turn. While he couldn’t give me a zero percentage, because anything could happen, he did assure me that my quick actions had given Lug Nut the highest chance of having an uneventful night.

“There wasn’t much time for the toxins to get in his system. You did everything right,” he assured me.

I went home, a sob escaping me at the empty house. Spying the offending flowers still on the kitchen table, I went to them,plucking out the lilies and throwing those away in the outside trash can. Once the lilies were gone, I moved the arrangement to the top of the fridge, but not before checking every other flower in the vase to check for toxicity. By all appearances, what was left might cause him to barf, but that would be the extent if he managed to hoist himself to the top of the refrigerator.

My father had texted right at midnight, so I responded, filling him in on the evening. After we texted a few moments, I felt myself beginning to come down from the adrenaline rush. I wanted another hot bath and then it would be straight to bed for me.

I had no sooner started the bath water when my phone buzzed again. It was the veterinarian, Dr. Neeman, with words of reassurance about Lug Nut. I was struck by how kind of a gesture that was. He could see how much my dog meant to me and even though I had left the clinic less than an hour before, he let me know that he had taken another round of vitals and all looked good. He also said the dog showed some interest in food, so they allowed him to have some bland chicken and he was tolerating that well. The doctor then assured me that staff would be checking on him throughout the night and would provide another update if I desired. I definitely desired that and confirmed that I would appreciate any additional updates, no matter the time.

Feeling relieved and a bit hopeful, I sunk down into the tub until the water was under my chin. I couldn’t stay in here too long because I was tired enough to just fall asleep right there.

“The new year had better start better than this one ended,” I grumbled.

My mind began to wander then, going back over the last few months. Things had looked so hopeful. I had a very challenging and rewarding career, I cared for Adrian and knew… I knew… he had begun to care for me, too.

“And that was the crux of the matter,” I whispered. “He didn’t want to care. He didn’t want to feel. He was looking for something,anything,to focus on and divert his attention.”

I still had no idea when he was coming back from Japan, or even if he was coming back. We needed to have a conversation about Blair because I didn’t understand why he was so upset that night he had stopped by for dinner. If anything was a clear example of Adrian looking for something to focus on instead of his feelings, that was certainly it.

I stayed in the tub until the water was cool and my eyelids were heavy. A quick glance at my phone showed me just how late it was. “Or early, depending on how you viewed time,” I told myself.

My arms felt like lead and I struggled to put on the oversized T-shirt I wore to sleep in. One final trip to the kitchen for a glass of water and some ibuprofen to ward off the headache that was starting and I could finally fall face first into my pillows.

My dreams were vivid and disturbing, with visions of Lug Nut falling through holes or off cliffs, his yelps of fear and pain terrifyingly real. More than once, I snapped awake with a racing heart, my pulse rate through the ceiling while I struggled to understand what was real and what was my mind torturing me.

Another message from the vet clinic came through, easing my worry somewhat. The doctor said the crucial hours had passed and the dog seemed to be perking up.

I thanked him again for his kindness and did my best to try and catch a bit more sleep before dawn, but the house was too quiet. I hadn’t realized how much I had come to use Lug Nut’s soft snoring as white noise. Without it, every snap, crackle, and pop of the house settling seemed loud and obnoxious.

Laying there, I willed myself to ignore the lingering sounds of people celebrating the new year. Fireworks, very illegal incity limits, could be heard in the distance anyway, along with muffled music from the club several streets over.

“God, this place is so noisy. Go to bed,” I groused, slamming a pillow over my head.

31.Adrian

Lotus did very little to help me forget my troubles. It didn’t even provide the distraction that it once did. Nothing made me stop thinking about Brynn. It didn’t help working alongside her, even remotely, because the mere mention of her name was enough to invoke memories I wanted to keep buried.

“I know what you’ve been doing, and where. You might think you’ve kept it secret, but the truth will always come to the light.”

Those words were ones my twin had said to me the night she died. No, not died. The night she was brutally murdered. My gaze dropped down to my hands, and no matter how often I scrubbed them, I could see her blood on my skin. Only, it wasn’t just Aria’s, but Blair’s as well.

I was a cold blooded killer, yet I never faced any repercussions for my actions. Was I remorseful? Absolutely, but I had yet to pay for my crimes, and I knew why. The night I’d called my parents to tell them about my sister had been a complete blur. Even now, I could only remember bits and pieces of my father’s cursing while my mother sobbed brokenly from across the room.

It'd been so heart-wrenching to me at the time, I’d agree with anything if only she would stop crying. She never did, despite the vow I’d made to my father, and I suspected that she still cried about Aria, and to a lesser extent, me.

Everything had been covered up, and as I stood there in the mirror wondering when I’d become the monster staring back at me, my father had come back to tell me that he’d taken care of everything. No one would be the wiser as to what I’d done, and it was then when I’d sold whatever was left of my soul to a man even more unfeeling than me. I’d let my father sweep everything under the rug, and it was only days later when I told him I wanted to confess. He’d told me how much trouble he, and my mother, would be in for helping me. I’d already broken up the family, but if I didn’t remain silent, I would destroy it completely.

After making assurances that I would take the secret to my grave, I’d turned and the pain from earlier had disappeared completely from my eyes. It was replaced by an emptiness that had stayed with me ever since. It’d been there in Greece, and it was certainly here now in San Francisco.

I decided at that moment to leave Lotus, so I returned home. Only, it didn’t feel like much of one to me. If I were being honest, the godforsaken hotel room in Japan had felt a lot more inviting which was crazy considering this penthouse had been decked out in all the normal Christmas colors a month earlier. And it’d been the first time I could’ve ever said that about this place, too.

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