Page 16 of Whispers in the Dark

I inhaled from my spot at the back of the sanctuary, the familiar scents of pine and lemon cleaners strangely bringing me comfort. My dad stood in the doorway, and I could feel his eyes on me while I walked to the table of candle arches. A number of votives had already been lit even at this time of the morning, andI was about to add two more. The first one I lit was actually for Adrian, and I sent up prayers that he could eventually turn loose of whatever he was wrestling with. The second candle was for my sister. I went to the altar rail for this prayer because it was going to take me longer. Her soul was not at rest and my biggest desire was for her to find peace.

While I knelt, I felt the cushion give way beside me and my dad joined me there. His shoulders shook with grief, so I clasped one of his hands with mine while we silently said our respective prayers in that beautiful chapel. I sensed movement behind us and assumed a member of the clergy was waiting to see if we needed to speak with someone. While I appreciated the gesture, we wouldn’t be speaking with anyone today. Once we were finished, I rose, walking to the offering box by the candle table, leaving a generous donation so this chapel could hopefully continue to operate for years to come.

After thanking the pastor with a nod, we left, riding in silence back to my father’s house. The energy in the SUV was different. Not a bad different, just different. I knew what had just occurred in that little church had opened the door for us to openly talk about Blair as we had needed to do for months.

This would be a good, healing visit for both of us. I had a feeling that while there would be a lot of sadness, he and I would also be able to find happiness and joy in the memories that we had made with Blair over the years. No one would ever be able to take those from us.

Sunday night, after an hour flight delay from Portland, I managed to make it back home and to pick up Lug Nut from my neighbor mere minutes before the thunderstorm started. I had been worried that my plane wasn’t going to be able to land because of the lightning, but it had held off long enough to get me back home.

I’d had an emotional time with my dad. The first birthday without my sister had now passed, and after the unpleasant way Friday night had ended between us, Adrian hadn’t reached out to me one time over the weekend. Granted, I wasn’t exactly his responsibility, but I had somewhat hoped he might have at least tried to see how I was doing.

I spent quite a bit of time with the dog just hugging his neck and telling him how much I had missed him. I already felt guilty during the week for leaving him with the neighbor so much, though from the “report cards” and pictures I got each day, they both enjoyed the male bonding. I know Erik was certainly enjoying the cookie payment he got every two weeks.

The wind began to pick up and I could hear rain begin to pelt harder against the windows. Thunder rumbled in the distance, the boomers growing closer together. It was predicted we’d have this weather for the next several hours. I didn’t mind a good thunderstorm as long as I didn’t have to be out in it. The dog didn’t mind it either, thank goodness.

I decided the best thing for me to do on a night like this was to take a nice, hot bath. Lug Nut padded along behind me while I walked to the kitchen to pour a glass of wine, then he followed me toward the bathroom. I wasn’t motivated to start unpacking in the slightest. I was mentally, physically, and emotionally spent, and just needed some self-care. Hopefully, the bath would enable me to actually shut down and get some sleep before facing Adrian in the morning. I wouldn’t be able to handle him unless I was fully charged.

What scent did I want to use in my bath water tonight? Standing in nothing more than a silk kimono, I picked up jar after jar of bath salts, not happy with anything in my selection. Finally resigning to use a blend with lavender, I set it, along with my wine glass, on the rim of the tub and went to turn on the tap when the dog’s body language changed.

His ears went up and he got very still, a low growl rumbling in his throat. He was now in full-on protect mode. This didn’t happen very often, so I was immediately worried. Glancing at the front door camera monitor I had on the vanity; I went still also. Adrian Benedict was standing on my front porch, and he was now ringing my doorbell.

11.Adrian

As I stood outside of Brynn’s door, I had almost wished that this had been just another sleep walking incident, but it hadn’t been. I was fully aware of where I was, and why. In fact, I had been circling the neighborhood for several hours, even spending some time out in the open as I waited. The skies had been dark for most of the day, and once or twice, they unleashed upon us all. Thankfully, the last hour or two had stayed dry, but I doubted I would be able to say that too much longer. More rain was on the radar, and the incessant thunder was leading it to us.

Sure that I would get drenched, I moved from the covered bench back to my car and prepared myself to circle the block a few more times. When I had gotten inside and placed the key in the ignition, I finally saw Brynn arrive home. Wanting to give her a few minutes to get settled in, I forced myself to stay where I was until she had sufficient time. If I waited too long, I was worried she might actually turn in for the night.

That thought evoked a wicked visual, and I audibly groaned as I pictured Brynn lying in her bed in nothing more than a T-shirt and pair of silky panties. As I entertained it in my head,another more X-rated one crossed my mind, and it made my dick hard instantly. Maybe she slept completely naked.

Fuck! Not what I need to be thinking about right now.

And I knew that inner voice was right. I was not some man waiting on his lover to return home for some romantic interlude. I was the girl’s boss, and I needed to apologize for what I had done to her a few nights earlier. I had never meant to snap at her, then abruptly end contact with her, but when she began questioning me about my youth, I shut down. Only God, and my parents, knew why Greece was the last place I’d want to take a stroll down memory lane in.

Brynn didn’t know, and I had to keep it that way. The shame and grief were heavy weights, but the regret I felt over the murder of my twin was like a massive boulder keeping me imprisoned. I couldn’t ever go down that path with her, and I wouldn’t.

Then what am I going to tell her?

Apologizing for anything was a foreign enough concept, and it was something I never did. The last decade or so, I had lived my life unapologetically, so it made no sense that I would purposely drive over here to do something I never did before. I had to, though. The longer I went without making things right with her, the more unsettled I remained. I had to tell her something, and I just hoped those two words would be enough.

I’m sorry.

They sat on my tongue, the bitterness like acid, but I was steadfast in getting this over and done with. I would simply knock on her door, then speak my piece before going back home to regret something altogether different. Something altogether preventable. I didn’t want to think about that, so I finally stepped in front of her door, then pressed the doorbell.

I heard it ring, followed by the sound of heavy barking. Lug Nut. Her dog was making his presence known well before shewas, and as I shifted somewhat nervously on my feet, I almost thought about just leaving. Another few seconds passed before I finally heard approaching footsteps. The doorknob jingled and I straightened to full height. When the door opened, her face was devoid of any emotion whatsoever, and I knew she was still mad at me.

I said nothing as I drank her in. Starting at her face, I could tell she no longer had any makeup on, not that she actually needed it. Brynn was naturally beautiful, and those good looks and youthfulness were the reason. My gaze lowered and dropped to her chest which I could tell was heaving behind her silk bathrobe.

For a moment, I almost wanted to take the silken belt and untie it like one would a present, then pull the front apart so I could see how little she had on underneath it. I showed some restraint, however, and finally looked back at her when I heard a menacing growl come from behind her. She turned and said something to her dog who eyed me with intentions, then padded away from us.

“What do you want, Mr. Benedict? I’ve been traveling all day, and it’s late. I need to go to sleep soon so I’ll be on time to work tomorrow.”

“You’re coming to work tomorrow?”

I didn’t know why I had asked something so asinine. Of course she would be there. Just because I had been rude to her over text message, it was no grounds to quit. While she was well-qualified for the job I hired her for, I knew she wouldn’t make the same kind of money anywhere else, even doing the same thing. That had been by design. I needed her close so I could watch over her. Again, it was something I had never done before. In hindsight, I should have, but it didn’t matter now.

“Is there a reason I shouldn’t?” She asked.

“Umm, no. I didn’t mean it like that. I just... ahh... I maybe thought...”

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