Page 45 of Snowman

"If you want to play with that little girl, we can ask Dad to bring her home," Mom said, looking at me through the rearview mirror light, almost teasing.

Erik shook his head, fast, his face unreadable. I did not understand why. All I knew was that she was so beautiful, that little girl. I wanted her near me, to play with me, to build snowmen in the yard. And so I nodded enthusiastically, a grin spreading across my face. This strange idea filled me with an even weirder feeling of happiness, like getting a forbidden toy that I had always wished for but never dared to ask for.

For the first time in a long time, something good may happen, I thought.

PRESENT DAY

I stood for two hours in the shade of the forest and saw the cottage burn. The fire roared and hissed, swallowing wood, memories, and evidence until nothing remained but ash and smoke curling into the cold night air. The silence afterward was almost holy.

Hiding behind the trees, I watched Jan Johansson arrive; his headlights cut through the smoke. He'd tracked his son's phone, thinking he was closing in on answers. But what Jan did notknow was that his son's grave lay far from here, deep, buried beneath frozen earth. His lungs would fill with nothing but dirt and frost by the time he found him.

I promised myself a long time ago that no one would stop me. Not from doing what I had to do. My father's sins shaped and molded me into what I am, and in that darkness, I found a purpose. The thirst for blood had settled in me long ago, but I kept it focused: only on those who truly deserved harm.

Deep down, I knew this was wrong; everything I did was wrong. But it would have been worse if I'd let myself take anyone, killing without reason. Then I wouldn't just be a villain. I'd be a monster.But villains can be good, right?If someone cared to hear their side of the story.

I stepped into the hospital, my footsteps sounding inaudibly on cold tiles. In the corner of the lobby stood a man clutching a bouquet of red roses. He set them softly down on a bench and leaned against the coffee machine, fiddling with some change.

I moved quietly, slipping close enough to pluck a single rose from the bouquet. I thought of taking the whole thing but then noticed the teddy bear tucked beside it with a handmade note:You did it, Mommy.My conscience got in the way, and I didn't have the heart to take all of it. All I needed was one rose, one for Bree.

She deserved a thousand, but for now, this single one would have to speak for all the days ahead when she'd be free of those monsters who stole her choices, her safety, her innocence.

Even if I couldn't see her, even if she didn't want me there, I needed to leave her this one small gift.

I stood in the hall, holding onto the rose for dear life, and just waited for that perfect moment. It wasn't until she finally shuffled out of her room, wrapped up in those hospital pajamas, making her slow way to the bathroom, that I had my chance. Asthe door clicked shut behind her, I slipped inside and gently laid the rose on her bed.

"Birdie,"I whispered into the stillness. "From now on, you’ll be safe with me."

Every step away from her room was like a knife twisting inside my chest, digging a void that only she could fill. Every step reminded me of the stories that would never be told, the future that was never meant to be.

By the time I got to the hall, my phone vibrated in my pocket, drawing me out of the pain of a silent goodbye. Erik's name flashed across the screen.

Call me as soon as you get this.

His urgency chilled me through more than the winter air did outside. I slipped out of the hospital as fast as I could, making sure nobody was watching. The cold nibbled at my face, the only warmth was my breath against the frozen night. Outside, under the pale streetlights, I hit number two on my speed dial and put the phone to my ear. Erik's voice answered almost at once.

"Hey," I said into the phone, my voice low, my hand shoved deep into my pocket, trying to keep the cold from seeping further into my bones. "What is it?"

"I found her," Erik said, his voice steady, almost grave. "I found the girl."

"Speak," I snapped, the urgency in my tone sharper than I intended.

"Lower your damn tone," he barked back, "or the only thing you’ll hear is the slap I’ll give you when I see you."

I couldn’t help but chuckle despite myself. "Yeah, sorry. It’s been... a day."

"I heard," he replied. "The chief even called me in."

I exhaled, my breath visible in the freezing air. "What did you find?"

"Both girls Joe had in that house? They’ve been missing since 2001," he said. "And they weren’t the only ones."

"Why am I not surprised?" I muttered. "Is the case still open?"

"Yes," Erik said. "But they’re tying it to another cold case."

I pulled the phone slightly away from my ear, staring blankly ahead, frustration brewing inside me. "Yeah?" I finally said, my voice taut.

"Remember the little blonde girl? The one you wanted to play with at the park in ’94?" His voice carried a note of hesitation like he wasn’t sure he should say the words. "She’s been missing since then. They think it’s connected."