Page 42 of Forbidden Knots

I picked up another page, the date was just from yesterday. My hands shook as I read it, my palm hitting my mouth as tears streamed down my cheeks.

Note for myself,

I've never been happier. Christian is giving me everything I ever wanted, and I can finally say that all those dreams of asking myself if anyone would care if I were gone one day have just disappeared. In a world where everyone pretends and everyone lies, Christian was the only one who told me the truth. I wish I could just escape and be with him, but Thalia was right. Everything has consequences, and whatever we do will haunt the ones we love, and I couldn't do that to Tristan. I can see he is happy too. I would hate myself if I kept him from Thalia, but I know how he can be, and I know how fragile she can be. They will break each other, and no one will be able to save them, not even me. Tristan deserves someone who will be strong for him, who will keep him in his place as Chiara does, even if that makes him miserable.

I know one day, that all of us will go our separate ways, that we will all find our paths. I believe in happiness now, and I believe in the stars. Stars are the ones to make our day brighter and our night lighter. And I wished upon a star for a path where I will be free from my past, and all those who are haunting me.

My palms wiped my tears away, and I handed the paper to Christian, who was still watching through the window, hoping Sophie would come back. His face was still pale, now streaked with tears tracing a path to his mouth. I sat back, my hands covering my face, struggling to breathe.

Chiara came closer, her palm gently resting on my shoulder as she whispered, "She will be back."

As much as I knew Sophie was right, I wanted Thalia by my side, not her, and in this madness, I did what I did best—I pushed her away.

"Chiara, when will you realize I am not for you," I admitted, "I can't stand you."

She looked at me, my words sinking in, but then her lips twisted into a laugh. "Are you serious?"

She stepped back, then walked to the sofa to grab her purse. "You know what, Tristan? I can't stand you either."

"Then fucking leave," I shouted.

"You are so fucking blind,cazzo," she shouted back. "I deserve so much better than you. I deserve someone who will hold me like a queen, not hang on my neck wanting to choke me."

She chuckled,"Va' a fare in culo!"and showed me her middle finger.

As she walked through the door, she came back just to add a few more things. "And you and your slut you fucked, yeah I know, she was wearing your shirt."

My eyebrows meshed, forming a line of confusion on my face.

"Don't pretend," she added. "You sent her to spy on me in the woods, I bet she spied on Sophie too."

"You two fucking creeps, you deserve each other," she said, swearing a few more things in Italian before she slammed the door.

Christian turned towards me, placing the pages on the table, his shoulders slumping as he shattered in front of me.

"Man, I am too weak to beat the shit out of you for hurting my sister, so I will just pretend I didn't hear any of it."

"Sophie cared about you," I admitted, "but I need to be alone."

"You're a piece of shit, Tristan," Christian said. "Sophie was right; you like pushing people away. But one day that shit will hit you right in the head," he said, placing a palm on my forehead and pushing my head back.

"And I am not leaving," he continued. "I will find us some heavy drink, and we will deal with this shit."

TWENTY FOUR

Storm

Idon't remember falling asleep. I don't remember sleeping, and I don't feel like I slept at all. I turned around in my bed and all I saw was a clock that already ticked seven. The door slowly creaked open, and I pulled the sheets over me, my body shaking in fear.

Grandma sat down next to me, her hands slowly pulling the sheet from me and holding a cup of coffee in front of me. "It's just me,bambina."

I didn't want to move. I just turned to the other side, not saying anything, not able to say a single word.

"I took care of everything," she said. "No one will ever know."

She wrapped her hands around me as I sat up, my back leaning against the wall, her hands dry like bark gently gliding through my hair.

It hit me like a ton of bricks.

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