Page 20 of Benji

God, I could get used to this.

I didn’t dare to get used to this.

I could enjoy it while I was here. It had been so freaking long since I’d had anyone tend to me, care for me. Sure, Fitch and Ky looked out for me, as I did for them, but they’d never tended to me.

Not like Nolan did.

“I’ll be right back,” he said. “Do you need anything else?”

“My phone,” I replied. “Sorry to be a pain.”

“It’s no bother,” he said with a smile before he disappeared out the door.

He came back with a glass of water, a sleeve of pills, and my phone. “It’s still only ibuprofen. I might duck down to the chemist and see if I can get something stronger over the counter. And some muscle rub.”

“You don’t have to do that,” I tried.

“It’s no problem.” Then he cocked his ear. “Oh, that’s the microwave. Hang on.” He was gone and came back a moment later with the heat pack. “Okay, try this.”

He helped me sit up, pressed the heat pack to my lower back, then gently laid me back down. It felt so good that I didn’t have the heart to tell him the pain wasn’t that bad.

I didn’t mean to play it up, but my god, he was so attentive.

So attractive.

He popped two pills and helped me sip the water to get them down. And all I could do was take in the line of his jaw, the column of his neck, the concern in his eyes, how his tongue swiped across his bottom lip.

“Everything okay?” he asked.

I laughed quietly. “Never better.”

“I mean your back.”

“It’s honestly not that bad. I just stood up wrong.”

He frowned at that. “Hm. I could call a doctor?—”

“No,” I said, trying to sit up, but with his hand on my shoulder, he urged me to stay still.

“Okay, no doctor,” he relented. “But I’ll get some more pills and some heat rub. I won’t be long. Any requests?”

“If I said you didn’t need to do that, would you listen?”

He considered that for half a second. “Nope.”

I rolled my eyes but kinda laughed. “Fine.”

“I’ll be ten minutes.”

I lay there in the dark and quiet, absorbing this new feeling of being looked after. It was a warm and fuzzy sensation, with a good dose of longing and an edge of sadness and grief.

Longing to have this forever, sadness to know that I couldn’t, and grief for the last time I felt cared for was when I was a kid.

Before my mother left, and before my father was free to be the arsehole he is...

Nope. Don’t go down that path . . .

I picked up my phone and saw I had a few messages from Ky, asking how I was and if I needed anything. And from Fitch.

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