Page 25 of Sensuous

My cousin takes the empty beer bottle out of my hand and begins walking toward the kitchen. “Oh, the siren song of our fathers’ approval. That shit will get you every time. Trust me. I know better than anyone else.”

Maybe he’s right. All I know is I didn’t like feeling like a failure in my father’s eyes. I like being the golden boy of the family. I’m not ready to give that up.

CHAPTER TWELVE

Kat

The darknessof the club Sadie and I chose for tonight’s attempt to drown our sorrows allows me to be my miserable self and not have to force a smile for anyone. I don’t think I could muster a true, happy grin for anyone at this point. Thankfully, Sadie knows me for long enough that she understands I just need to muddle through this mood for a little while.

“How’s the piña colada? I don’t think I’ve ever seen a drink with that much whipped cream. It’s more like a dessert than a drink,” she says, pointing at the tower of white foam at the top of my glass.

I turn to look at her drink of vodka and orange juice and wonder how she can stand that. “You know how I am. I’m not really a drinker, so I have to camouflage my attempt at alcoholism with lots of sugary stuff.”

She shakes her head at the truth about how terrible a drinker I am. “Yes, I know. You’re the same way with coffee. I think youmust consume more whipped cream than any other person I’ve ever known.”

“Too bad it’s never when it would be fun,” I mumble before taking a pull on my straw and getting a mouthful of piña colada.

My friend nudges her elbow into my arm and laughs. “Maybe Marco will be into whipped cream during sex.”

All that gets from me is a roll of my eyes and a groan. The last thing I want to do with Marco is anything involving nudity and whipped cream. After the hours I spent with him already, I now know the hardest thing I’m going to have to do for this competition is act like I want him.

What a jackass! When he wasn’t trying to put his hands all over my body, he was making suggestions about how I could show the world he was someone I desperately craved. I told him no less than ten times to stop pawing at me, but each time only seemed to encourage him to do it more. The guy is like a horny octopus. I’d bat his hand away from touching my hip only to find the other one grabbing at my other side.

The worst part of it all is I don’t think anyone had to instruct him to actually act that way. Once Maria and Shane told him about our storyline for the show, he was all in, one hundred percent on board with the two of us being entirely consumed by lust for one another.

Pretending to be crazy about him is going to be next to impossible if I’m always having to stop his hands from roaming all over me. I just have to remember that this is all part of the experience. I want to win this competition more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life, so if winning means I have to put up with Marco and his sexual harassment to get a million dollars, then that’s what I’ll do.

It's not that much worse than dealing with my boss on most days, and there’s no chance I’ll ever make anything close to a million bucks there.

“I don’t care what Marco is into regarding anything but especially sex.”

“How far do you think you’ll have to take this whole wanting him thing for this show?” Sadie asks with a distinct sound of concern in her voice. “I mean, they aren’t going to expect you to go out with him on a date or anything, right? This isn’t one of those reality shows, is it?”

The mere thought of going out anywhere with Marco sends a chill running down my spine. Maria and Shane said nothing about that, but then again, they never mentioned a romantic storyline when I auditioned for the show.

“Do you know Alex March didn’t have to try out to get on Chef on Chef?” I blurt out as the memory of him rubbing that little fact in my face comes rushing back to me.

“Really? How is that possible when you and everyone else had to try out to get on it?”

I shrug, not even sure everyone else had to audition. Maybe only I did. Damn, that makes me feel like shit.

“No idea. I guess he’s special. Super Chef to the rescue. Not that any of our cooking abilities matter anyway. This entire production seems to be focused on interpersonal things, which of course, puts me at a disadvantage.”

Sadie puts her hand on my forearm and gives it a gentle squeeze. “Don’t say that. You’re as kind as the next person. You just don’t take shit from people. There’s nothing wrong with that, so don’t go convincing yourself that you aren’t nice.”

“So far, the only person I really get along with is Emma. I loathe one guy and can’t stand the other one because all he wants to do is paw me like some animal. One out of three isn’t a good turnout, Sadie.”

She gives me a sympathetic smile and sighs. “Well, I like you. I have since the first day we met.”

“Thank you. I appreciate you being one of the half dozen people on the planet who doesn’t hate me.”

Shaking her head, she smiles at my slip into the land of self-pity. “People don’t hate you, Kat. They just don’t know you. When someone really finds out how you are, they always like you.”

I want to mention the dozen or so men I’ve dated in the past year as evidence against her argument that people like me, but I keep that to myself. Tonight is supposed to be for running away from our problems, and here I am hanging out with them like they’re my best friends.

“Enough about the mess this reality show is. Tell me what’s going on with work,” I say as I take another big sip of my drink.

Sadie tips her glass to her lips and finishes the last of her vodka and orange juice. “My boss thinks I would be perfect to go to the convention with her next month. I think it’s in Kansas City or somewhere like that. Why would I want to go there?”