Page 103 of Shattered Hearts

In the heat of the moment and in the midst of wading through my own thoughts and feelings about our sex marathon, I rationalized his absence as work-related. But that wasn’t it, was it?

Who could have that much sex with someone the day before and not stay with them the morning after? Or at least leave a note? A text, a phone call, a business card, something!

Only someone who regrets their actions or has no intention of taking things any further could act that way, like a ghost… I just didn’t want to see it. The Red Hill attack on Cian and me threw things off, but Finn was probably planning to straighten up and fly right, same as I was…

Until our fight earlier and the crazy BDSM audition that came after…

But I’m sure I must be out of his system by now, afterthat.

Why bother to draw me a bath?

I hope he’ll leave me alone while I wash so I can attempt to recompose myself from the mess he’s made of me, but as the tub fills up, Finn submerges himself on the opposite end, surprising me for the umpteenth time today.

We’re facing each other.

Heart hammering, I hug my knees to my chest and try not to wince from the still-shimmering pain in my ass while the hot water forces my achy muscles to relax. When I sneak a glance at Finn’s face, I barely recognize him, almost like we’re meeting for the first time. I’ve never seen him look so open, sofree.

Like the shadow that hangs over him at all times has moved on for a little while.

He tips his chin at me. “Come here.”

My eyes snap to his.

He wants more? But I already agreed to tell him the truth…And I don’t think I have more in me. Orgasm denial takes a lot out of a girl…

Uncertain and self-conscious, I crawl his way, trying to imagine what sexual, domineering thing he’ll do to me next?—

Finn takes my arm and guides me toward him, maneuvering me so that I’m seated between his legs, my back to his chest. I’m barely breathing when he grips my shoulders all of a sudden, causing me to jump. He pulls them backward, until I’m reclined against him, but it feels unnatural and awkward in my body.

That doesn’t change until I let go and…trust him. Enough to relax into this position, just a little bit.

The gush of the faucet filling the tub cuts out with asqueakas Finn stops the water, plunging us into an aqueous silence.

At some point, I discern that he’s waiting for me to hold up my end of the bargain, and I begin to tell him the whole and complete truth.

I tell him everything, as I understand it. Charlene’s story, Harper’s tale of woe—including the fact that Dad ordered her to seduce Finn—everything that happened on their wedding day from my perspective.

Meanwhile, Finn’s heartthunksagainst my back, hard and strong, shattering my focus.

The only details I leave out are the promises I made to Finn’s father at the reception, and of course, the fact that I used to be crazy about him and definitely…still am.

Finn says nothing the entire time I’m explaining.

Even when I’m finished, he doesn’t say a word. His silence freaks me out, especially since I can’t see his face. I have no way to gauge his reaction.

When he wraps his arms around my shoulders, I stiffen, only to relax as he gathers me in a gentle hug instead of a chokehold.

And when he kisses the shell of my left ear, I suspect we’re more than okay. But I don’t know for sure until his hands start to roam my body like he’s memorizing every inch of my form with just his fingertips. This is…aftercare, isn’t it?

I dare to hope that aftercare wouldn’t be happening, if things between us were too wrong…

Later, at our leisure, we bathe, washing away the last several hours from our bodies. And when we’ve toweled off and the tub is drained, Finn draws my arms around his neck and picks me up again, hands hooked beneath my thighs.

This time, as he carries me back to his bed, he stares into my eyes the whole way. The lights are low and warm when he lays me down. That he knows how to be this gentle astonishes me beyond speech.

Finn smirks at my expression.

“I told you I’d finish fucking you after you told me the truth.”

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