Page 29 of Second Chance with Seth

She could have called you…

The voice echoes around my head, but I block it out.

Why should she? Why should she have called? I could have called her. I know I had my reasons not to at the time, but now they just feel like excuses. Besides, I’d given her no cause to trust me… and this is all about trust. It’s not about hate, or even love. Not really. It’s about her not trusting me enough to tellme… and that’s a very sobering thought. It’s sobering enough to make me stop walking, halfway across the hotel parking lot.

I’ve always prided myself on being a better man than my father, but I’m not, am I?

I’m exactly the same.

What’s worse is that, having got it all wrong a second time, I’m not sure she’ll ever be able to forgive me – let alone trust me – ever again.

What am I going to say to her? Where do I even start?

I glance around, maybe hoping for inspiration, and I realize I’m standing in exactly the same spot as I did on the night I first kissed Everly. Does that mean something? Is it a sign? Probably not, and I stare down at the ground for a moment, just as I hear someone call my name. It’s a woman, but I know it’s not Everly, and I glance up, letting out a groan as I see Helen Rogers, standing at the top of the hotel steps.

She’s with two other women, and she’s smiling straight at me. Her friends glance in my direction too, before Helen says something to them, and they smile, watching her as she heads down the steps and makes straight for me.

It would be rude – not to mention childish – to turn away, and I can hardly duck around her and go into the hotel. So, I stand my ground, hoping she’s just going to say hello and leave.

“Seth,” she says, repeating my name as she comes to a stop right in front of me.

She hasn’t changed a bit, although I think her hair might be a little shorter. She’s wearing a plain blue dress, which hugs every contour of her body, and as I suck in a breath, she moves closer still. I never used to feel this uncomfortable around her. In fact, I used to like the fact that she was so attentive, and that she wanted to spend so much time with me. It was just what I needed at the time… when I was being a child, and was too busyfocusing on what was wrong between Everly and me, rather than concentrating on how to make it right again.

“How are you?” I ask, to be polite, although I take a step back, bumping straight into the car behind me. I’m trapped, and I don’t like it. This feels nothing like it used to, although Helen doesn’t seem to notice and sidles closer, looking up into my eyes.

“I’m a lot better now you’re here,” she says, licking her lips in a slow, seductive move. “I didn’t know you were back.”

She brushes her hand up and down my arm, and I lean away from her as far as the car will allow.

“Yeah, I am.”

Wild horses couldn’t drag me away from Hart’s Creek now. Everly and I have a daughter. We’re a family, so I’m back, and I’m not going anywhere…

“We’ll have to get together,” she whispers, tilting her head. “I’m free tonight, if you…”

“I’m not available.”

“There’s always tomorrow.”

“No. I mean, I’m not available. Period. I never was.”

She steps away, confusion written all over her face. I can’t blame her for that. If I’d shut her down in the first place, she’d never have been in any doubt. I’m about to explain that when she glances over my shoulder, her eyes widening slightly, and I turn to see what’s caught her attention, my heart stopping for the umpteenth time this weekend, when I see Everly standing on the corner, by the gym.

She must have followed me, but as our eyes lock, she places a hand on River’s back and then turns and walks away, her head bent.

Shit…

I don’t say a word to Helen… not even to apologize for pushing her out of the way as I spin around and sprint straightafter Everly. As I round the corner, she’s already by the front door of the Hart’s Creek Courier, and I up my pace, reaching her before she gets to the coffee shop. I run around in front of her, forcing her to stop, although I can’t fail to notice the tears in her eyes, guilt stabbing at my heart, because I know I put them there.

“I’m sorry, babe,” I whisper, and she glares at me. I know why, too. It’s because I called her ‘babe’, and I get ready to be told I can’t do that… I don’t have the right.

“It’s happening again, isn’t it?” she says, surprising me. “You’ve been back for less than a day and you’re already flirting with Helen… and right on the spot where we had our first kiss. How could you?”

“I wasn’t flirting. I just stopped there when Helen came out of the hotel and walked straight over to me.”

“What did she want?” Everly asks, still blinking back her tears.

“She mentioned something about getting together later, but I told her I’m not available… and that I never was. And I get that I should have told her that before. I’m just sorry I didn’t.” She lets out a deep sigh. “Please, Everly… please understand, I don’t care about Helen. I never did. All I care about is you… both of you.” I glance down at River, longing to touch my daughter, although I don’t. It feels like I need permission from her mom, and I don’t have it yet. When I look back up at Everly, I’m surprised to see her eyes have misted over slightly, although I’m not sure how to interpret that. Is she pleased or disappointed? Either way, there’s something else I need to say. “I’m sorry I walked away just now. I shouldn’t have done that.”

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