Page 75 of Dueling the Suitors

“Why areyouso stubborn?” she shot back, stepping towards him. “You are not even bothering to ask mewhyI am asking to open the gates! I want to step out of the castle walls for a moment. Is that too much?”

“Depends.Whydo you want to step out? And amidst a downpour!”

“Because I want to send a letter to my brother! Satisfied?”

Cyrus staggered back a little, the look in his eyes wild and disbelieving. “And you couldn’t come to me for it? Askmeto send it?”

Astoria huffed and crossed her arms. “Like I ever trusted you. I don’t even think you sent him my last letter.”

Cyrus’ eyes darkened. “You are not leaving the palace walls, and you are not sending him another letter again!” He turned and stormed back to the castle.

Astoria’s resolve broke. “Why are you doing this to me?” she called after him, her voice rising with a whirlwind of emotions. He didn’t respond. “Answer me!”

He kept stomping towards the castle. But Astoria wasn’t going to let him get away without answering her. She ran after him.

“Stop!”

He didn’t.

“I said, stop!”

He might as well be deaf.

“Cyrus!”

Cyrus came to an abrupt stop as though his feet were suddenly glued to the ground. Astoria panted to catch her breath and realized her slip. Her eyes widened.

At least it made him stop.

“Don’t even think for a second that I have no right to yell at you and be rebellious. You are the one who stripped me of my world, my family, and the one person who was my anchor in life—my brother! Do you realize what you have done to me by separating us? No, you don’t. You can’t. Because you don’t have a sibling—funny, I don’t even know if you have one. I don’t know a thing about you—my so-called husband.”

She sneered at the back of his head.

“Oh, so this ismyfault now? That you don’t know anything about me?” Cyrus turned to face her, a glare in his eyes. “Youare the one pushing me away every time I reach out to you.”

“Can you blame me? You ruined my life. You deceived me, lied to me, and kidnapped me! I’m married to a monster!”

Cyrus stood unfazed by her insult, but a fire blazed in his eyes. “Yes, I admit I did all that. But what have I done to you that makes you render me amonster? I made you a garden that you haven’t set foot in; I didn’t complain about the colour change in my room; I changed the black in every room you use when I realized you didn’t like it. Darn it, I even let you change the colour of my flag! Yes, I was harsh towards you at first, but which of these makes me the monster you claim I am, Astoria? Tell me, I want to know! And—don’t even think of mentioning my invasions here. I am asking what monstrous thing I have done toyou, my wife, since the day I brought you here.”

For a moment, Astoria was speechless at his outburst. Then she said, “For instance, you are refusing to let me write to my brother—as in, right now.”

Cyrus lifted his eyes to the sky as though praying for patience. He looked down at her. “For goodness’ sake, I only stopped you from sending a letter to him byyourself, which requires you to step out of the castle walls.”

“And now you won’t ever let me send him one because I tried to double-cross you.” She dared him to deny it.

He didn’t. “Yes.”

Tears attacked her eyes. Her emotions spiraled tenfold. “See, this is why I said you won’t understand. I don’t know if you have a sibling—I don’t care! But I have a brother back home who is worried sick about me. He—he’s the one who has taken care of me as long as I can remember, the one who has been my father figure more than my father ever was. I even despised the very idea of getting married because I hated being separated from him—which is exactly what you, my enemy, have done to me. Did you know that my brother sent me a departing gift that would help me not miss him too much? Because he knew I would, and he gave me his signature perfume that always reminded me of home. He wanted me to have it, hoping it would help me, telling me in his letter to tease him about it if he succeeded in accompanying me. Since he didn’t, I’ve been clinging to his gift like it’s my lifeline. And I can only hold on to that a little longer before I start to fall apart from my desperation to smooth over his worry and from missing him like crazy!”

Astoria paused for breath and realized she had said things she hadn’t intended to say. And there was no taking back the flood that broke out of her. She squeezed her eyes shut. She could only hope she didn’t regret this later.

When she opened her eyes, the look on Cyrus’ face startled her. He looked taken aback, but the expression was a gentle one that made her avert her eyes.

“Why didn’t you tell me this before?” His question was soft.

Astoria wanted to scoff, but she had no strength left. “Like that would have made any difference.”

“It just did, now, and you wouldn’t have known unless you told me.” He sighed. “Astoria…”