Page 50 of The Vanishing Throne

The cold water breaks through the heat and I sigh with relief. ‘Thank you.’

She takes my hand again. ‘Better?’ My response dies on my lips when I notice where I am. So that part wasn’t a dream. I’m in my bedroom.Home.

My head falls back against the pillows and I stare up at the gears along the ceiling, the lights above me. I’d seen that part of the wall caved in with a hole in it. The furniture rotting. This place doesn’t exist any more, not as it once did. It’s a heap of rubble, destroyed by the fae. And what remained of the room I adored so much –that I lovingly designed with my mother – was completely levelled by themortair. But here it looks so … perfect, surely I can’t be imagining this.

I touch my fingers to the counterpane, so much like my old one, the silk flattening beneath my palm. ‘Is this real?’ I whisper.Am I still dreaming?

I’m not. My arms are still covered in healed-over fae bites, the skin red and angry.

‘That depends on what you consider real,’ Catherine tells me. She presses my hand to the wooden frame of my bed. ‘Does this feel real to you?’

The grooves under my fingertips do. So do the designs carved into the headboard. I raise my head just enough to see the way my fingers press to the wood; I feel the texture of it, even as a pounding headache forms at my temples.

Finally it hurts so much that I have to lie back again. I shut my eyes against the pain. ‘Where am I?’

‘You’re still in the pixie kingdom. I’ll tell you everything when you’re better,’ she says. ‘Aithinne will be back soon to heal you again.’

My lips feel so dry. ‘What’s wrong with me?’

‘She said the old venom in your blood is reacting badly to the new.’ I feel Catherine’s fingertips on the scars at my wrist. ‘From these?’ she asks.

She asks the question lightly, but I note how it sounds like she’s holding back emotion. ‘Aye,’ I say, moments from sleep again. ‘From when I was in theSìth-bhrùth.’

‘I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you,’ she whispers.

I tighten my hand in hers. I can’t tell if she’s talking about what happened with Lonnrach or the wisps. I can only manage three words: ‘I’m sorry, too.’I’m sorry this is the world I left you with.

The next time I wake I feel sharper, more alert. When I look over to see if Catherine’s still there, I’m surprised to find Gavin is sitting in a chair beside the bed, reading a book. He looks up when I stir. ‘You look better.’ He closes his book and sets it aside.

Someone has changed my clothes. I’m wearing a clean white raploch shirt that’s about twice my size and trousers that fit only slightly better. My injuries are all healed from Aithinne’s work. The lighter bites hardly left any outline at all; the deeper ones are still small, barely more than circular marks between Lonnrach’s bites.

Unfamiliar scars wrap around my wrists.From the shackles, I realise. When the wisps attacked, I had strained against them so much that they cut into my skin. I hadn’t even noticed.

I set my jaw. ‘Where’s Catherine?’

‘She’s been with you for days now,’ Gavin says. ‘It was my turn.’

‘What if I don’t want you to have a turn?’

Gavin looks away. ‘I know you’re angry.’

‘You really don’t know how I’m feeling.’ I stare down at the scars again. I managed never to resist against the ivy in the mirrored room. I never had a reminder of that. Now I do.

Gavinwinces when he notices the scars. ‘I should have told you about—’

‘You didn’t tell me about the wisps, either,’ I say sharply. ‘If you had, I would have told you they can tell from my blood that I’m a Falconer. My energy is just as intoxicating to them as a Seer’s, Gavin.’

Guilt flashes in his gaze. ‘I didn’t know about that.’

‘Because you didn’task!’ He opens his mouth to speak, but I’m too fast. ‘Derrick told you I was different and that being a Falconer would make it worse. You lied to him about going easy on me, didn’t you?You tried to kill me.’

Gavin steps back. ‘No.No, I didn’t. I swear I didn’t.’ He looks like he’s about to reach for me, but his hands drop to his side. ‘Because you’re a Falconer I wasn’t certain if you could handle the pain of their bite better than a human. For god’s sake, Aileana, I’ve seen you fight before with injuries that would have killed anyone else.’

I shove the blanket off my legs. ‘I’m not particularly in the mood to hear your excuses.’ When I move to stand, Gavin grasps my wrist. ‘You’re not well.’

I jerk away from him. ‘Don’t touch me.’

He puts his hands up. ‘Aithinne might have healed the wisp bites, but you’re still recovering from the energy they took.’

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