Page 115 of The Vanishing Throne

Behind us, water explodes into the tunnel, bursting the rock dam apart.

If we slow even a little, it’ll drown us all. We’re not going to make it. I think of the light, of the powers unleashed with my first death, and I make a decision.

I stop to confront the wall of water.

‘Kam,don’t!’ I hear Kiaran shout behind me.

I glance at him, then at Catherine in his arms. ‘Save her like you saved me.’

And I turn to face the water, the mechanical creatures running with it, and whisper, ‘And let me give you more time.’

I unleash my power again. All the light I have inside of me becomes a force that hits the wall of water and the mechanical creatures with such force that I slide backward on my feet. I try to push again, but I don’t have the strength this time. Not enough.

Human enough,I think.Too human.I try to focus on holding back the water and the faeries behind it. I grow lightheaded; the pain of using that much power builds and builds until I cry out. I collapse onto my knees, and the first streams of water break through and rush around me.

I look back to make sure my friends are almost to the end of the tunnel. Almost there. Almost. I only have to hold it a little longer.

The water is rushing around my shield of light, faster and faster. Blackness seeps in at the outer edges of my vision and is starting to close around me in shadowy tendrils.Just a little longer.

Then I sense another presence there. Aithinne. Standing right next to me through it all. She grasps my hand, and through my fading sight, her uncanny eyes meet mine.

‘I don’t want you to die young,’she whispers. ‘Will you let me show you?’

I nod, the only movement I can manage.

Her power rushes through me, a torrent that fills me up and makes my veins burn with white-hot fire, like I’m being ripped apart. And all I can hear is the Cailleach’s voice in my head, whisperinghuman enough human enough human enough.

‘You’re resisting,’ Aithinne says. ‘Let all your power go.’

I feel my body sway with exhaustion. My human body. My body that was never meant to hold fae power or wield it like this. For a human, my body is strong. For a human, my body is exceptional. But it isn’t enough to hold Aithinne’s power. It is a shell of mortality. An exhausted thing of skin and bone.

I sway forward. Aithinne’s hand tightens around my palm. ‘Just breathe. Let everything go,’ she whispers. ‘You’re doing this. You can finish it.’

And I do. I let the light funnel out of me and I feel like it breaks my bones apart. Like my skin is burning. Like I am detached and without shape or form. The mechanical creatures howl, burn red, and disintegrate to ash.

And the darkness finally closes around me.

Chapter 37

I catch the scent of a fire, hear the crackle of wood, and feel the heat of the flames. I press my fingers to the ground – the barest of movements that I can make – and realise I’m lying on a thick blanket of wool that is soft against my fingertips.

All I recall is stumbling out of the cave with Aithinne. The others helping us through the forest as my vision spun and spun and spun. I don’t remember collapsing once we found somewhere to rest for the night. I don’t even remember closing my eyes.

My entire body hurts. My eyes are so tired and heavy that I have difficulty opening them. And when I do, I see trees towering above me. They are snow-tipped, with skeletal branches that creak and groan. Snow falls on my eyelashes, my cheeks, cooling the heat there.

A rustle comes from somewhere close by, but I can’t turn my head. Catherine’s face is suddenly in my field of vision, her brow creased with worry. ‘Oh, thank goodness. I was worried you’d … well. Well, you know.’She glances over her shoulder. ‘She’s awake.’

Suddenly, a giant ball of light comes hurtling at me. And there’s Derrick, at my neck, his wee hands pressed to my skin.

He curls there, warm wings against me. ‘You intend to be a martyr, don’t you? That’s the only thing that explains youstaying in the cave with the giant wall of water, you bloody insane human.’ He’s tangling himself in my hair, wings flicking my ear. ‘Let me just say: you’re lucky you’re like a damn cat with nine lives, or you’d be seafood. Welcome back!’

I swallow. My throat is dry, painfully dry. ‘What happened after we made it out of the cave?’ My words come out as a croak, a barely understandable wheeze. ‘I don’t remember much.’

‘Not a lot. You destroyed nearly all of the fae in that tunnel, so we escaped through the forest while the others regrouped. You and Aithinne barely made it here and now you both look like hell.’ He shrugs.

I manage to turn my head – an excruciating movement – to see Aithinne beside me, still asleep. She’s been bundled up even more than I have, her slight form lost in a sea of blankets. Her skin ispallid. Her eyelashes are kissed with snow and her lips are blue.

I don’t want you to die young.

---