Page 99 of The Falconer

Kiaran ignores me. He moves and I dodge without thinking. His fist goes straight into the locomotive’s passenger door, buckling it.

I mutter a curse of my own as I whirl to face him. ‘Damnation, MacKay! I just finished fitting that door. What the hell are you doing?’

The street lamps behind him illuminate his dark hair with a golden halo and the scant light betrays a hint of a smile. ‘Challenging you.’

‘I don’t accept.’

‘I don’t care.’

His arm shoots out and I’m sliding across the ground, grass burning my arms and my chin. I turn over and Kiaran picks me up by the ruff of my shirt.

‘Fight me,’ he growls.

‘I said I don’t want to!’

‘Do you think that will matter when we’re in battle? Will you tell our enemies thatyou don’t bloody want to?’

With a growl, I launch myself at him. We trade blows. His are so quick I barely have time to dodge them. I block one blow with my upper arm and try to kick out at his knee. He manages to hook an ankle around mine and sweep my feet out from under me. I land hard on my bottom.

‘Stop it, MacKay.’

Kiaran yanks me close. ‘Tell me what happened the night your mother died.’

I shove at his chest. ‘No.’

He tightens his hold. ‘Did you even want to save her?’ His eyes burn into mine. ‘Is that why you just stood by and let it happen?’

I scream. I smash my forehead against his and slam my fist into his face. This time, I’m faster. I push against him with all my strength. I kick and claw him until his shirtsleeves are torn and his skin is bleeding. Even then, I don’t stop. I shove him down to the ground and stand over him, ready to finish him off if I have to.

But he reaches up, striking fast, and drags me to the ground. He pins me under the heavy weight of his muscled body, clamping my arms against my sides as I buck against him. Confound it, I can’t even throw him off of me.

‘Damn you,’ I snarl.

‘You see how easy that was?’ he says, looking down at me. His eyes are black and inscrutable.

I heave in frustration. ‘What?’

‘For me to say the very thing that would make you violent.’

I try to roll him off, but he’s too blasted heavy. ‘Because you were trying to!’

‘Aye, I was.’ He clamps my wrists harder and lowers his face towards mine until our skin is almost touching. I stop struggling. For an awful moment, I think he’s about to kiss me. Perhaps even more awfully, I think I’d let him. I shiver at the thought.

‘I know your weakness, Kam. What triggers you.’ He leans in even closer, lips just above mine. ‘After the other night, so does Sorcha. And make no mistake – she’ll find some way to use it against you.’

He rolls onto his back. I lie there with the rough grass beneath me and press a hand to my chest. My heart beats rapidly beneath my palm, heavy thumps I can feel against my ribs.

‘You know why I had to do that,’ he says.

‘I know.’

Above us, the clouds part to reveal the stars, bright and untouchable. Polaris. Alderamin. Gamma Cassiopeiae. I remember my mother pointing to each star as she named them. Her smile was so beautiful and warm.

Can you name them, Aileana? Here now, repeat after me. Polaris. Alderamin. Gamma Cassiopeiae. Crimson suits you best.

I flinch and pull myself out of the memories. I can’t do it. I’m unable to remember my mother without recalling her death, without picturing her face flecked with blood. Without seeing Sorcha smile as she tore out her heart.

Now I’ll never be able to kill Sorcha. I’ll never find retribution for my mother’s death. I’ll have to let that disgusting faery live because I’ve come to care for Kiaran, far more than I ever thought I would.

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