Page 16 of Maddog

But first, I needed to go to Holly. El Diablo was also right that I didn’t need to spend any more time away from her than strictly necessary. Now, it wasn’t necessary.

Even given the gravity of everything that had happened in the last twenty-four hours, there was a lightness in my soul. Holly… was mine. She always had been. I just hadn’t grown into my feelings and neither had she. She was right. We knew way more than enough about each other to make a definitive decision about our future together. And I knew without a doubt there was no future for me without Holly in it.

Chapter Eight

Holly

Mom took me to her and Dad’s house in the big compound that was Black Reign MC. I’m not really sure why they wanted to be called a motorcycle club other than that Uncle El, as I’d called him since I was four, liked to pretend to be normal. I suppose being known as an MC was better than being thought of as a bunch of rich people doing shady shit. While the latter might be more easily overlooked, I always had the feeling El Diablo liked looking the part of a leader of rough and rowdy bikers. He was essentially thumbing his nose at conventionality and inviting law enforcement to keep an eye on the club. Probably because he liked watching them try to puzzle out what the fuck was going on and not being able to figure it out. The truth was, Black Reign MC had more money and resources at their disposal than some small countries. All thanks to El Diablo.

Wrath, my father, was also District Attorney for Palm Beach County. As such, there was no way anyone was touching Black Reign from a legal standpoint. My mother met Vincent “Wrath” Black when I was four. I didn’t know the whole story, but the end result was my mother didn’t have to work two or three jobs to pay for my medical care. Didn’t mean I hadn’t given him shit. Even as a young kid I was full of piss and vinegar. Mostly, I think I’d wanted to see how far I could push him. The answer was pretty Goddamned far.

When he and my mother married, he’d adopted me the same day. Being a big-shot lawyer tended to pave the way, I guess. Thatandhaving access to a really good computer guy. I’d never known my biological father. As far back as I could remember, it was always Wrath. He was the only father I’d ever known, and he’d been a great one. My little sisters had him wrapped around their fingers as much as I did, but they were sneaky about it. I never cared if he knew what I was doing or not. He’d proven to be incredibly patient and caring with me, my sisters, and of course, my mother.Especiallymy mother. The only time he and I had ever had words was when I was a smart-mouthed teenager and I’d said something to hurt my mother’s feelings. I got it now. Sometimes, a woman needed her man to have her back, even with her own children.

Mom shut the door behind us, and I let her lead me to the bathroom. My father hadn’t followed us home yet, but I knew he’d be here soon. Probably with Jax right behind him.

“I’m so sorry, Mom,” I said as a tear tracked down my cheek. “I know how much you and Dad love me and knew you would worry. I don’t know why I plowed on without even talking to you guys about what was going on.”

“Honey, Jax explained it. And I get it, baby. I do. What I hate is that I didn’t make you feel like you could come to me or your father about stuff like this. We’ll always have your back and take your concerns seriously. Wrath would have been happy to check into this guy for you. I hope you know that.”

“I do. But I also know Dad. He’d have sent an army with me, but only as far as the nearest black site he knew of to interrogate and torture Chris. Then they’d have packed me and Andrea up and carted us home.” I winced as I said Andrea’s name and a fresh flood of tears slid from my eyes.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”

“No.” I was firm in my denial. “Don’t feel sorry for me about Andrea. She played me. I was blinded by my loyalty to her and never once considered she was doing something shady with Chris.” I shook my head. “I don’t even know for sure either of them was doing anything. I mean, we suspected, and I know Jax got Chris’s phone data to Shotgun, but everything else is just speculation right now.”

“We can talk about this after you get a shower. I know you’re a grown woman and I’m not trying to baby you, Holly, but I’d feel better if I was in here with you in case you fall.” Mom gave me a small, unsure smile, and I knew she needed this. She was right that I didn’t want my mother to be in the bathroom with me while I showered, but having company in my bathroom was a small price to pay to ease my mother’s worry. God knew she’d worried enough about me over the years.

“Thanks, Mom. It’s probably best to have someone close. I’m dirty, hurt, and exhausted. Not taking a shower isn’t even an option, and a bath would be gross.”

“I love you, baby.” She was tearful but smiling. “I’m so glad you weren’t seriously hurt. You’re my world.”

“I love you too, Mom.” I looked at the floor and took a breath. “Are you…” I looked back up at her, needing to see her immediate reaction to my question. “Will you be OK with me and Jax being together?”

I needn’t have worried. Mom had always liked Jax. Especially when she’d seen him interact with me when I was so sick. “Holly, I’ve known since you were in your teens you’d claim that man for your own. I hated it when you were that young, but he kept you at arm’s length. Probably for that very same reason. He was a man. You were a teenager. Jax is many things, but he’s not a creep. He was never anything but appropriate with his care of you. He’s had my respect for a very long time, Holly. So yeah. I’m going to be fine with it.” When my mother genuinely smiled, there was nothing more beautiful. She’d always been that way. It wasn’t so much her looks as her inner light. My mother had walked through hell and back when I was sick. She’d done anything she had to, to make sure I had the medical care I needed.

“It’s important to me that you approve. Dad too. I… Sometimes, I think with my heart too much. Living in the moment is something I guess is ingrained in me after being so sick as a kid. I never subscribed to the mentality that if a guy picked on you, then he liked you. But when Jax picked on me, it was never malicious or hurtful. He was trying to get a rise out of me. Looking back, I know it was his way of distracting me. He’d do it over and over until I cried.”

Mom gasped, a look of horror on her face. “He did what?”

“No! Mom! It’s not like that!” I took Mom’s hand in mine and gripped it hard. “Jax knew that, once I started crying, it was time to stop picking at me because I’d gone past the point of any kind of distraction being able to hold me together. He knew that, when I stopped fighting him, I was ready to be held. And that’s what he did.”

I was afraid Mom might not believe me or accept my explanation, but my description was accurate. And it was exactly how it had to be. I’d never have surrendered to Jax. I couldn’t let him beat me. Jax knew what I could accept. He and Fury and Noelle had been the ones to teach me that even strong fighters get tired. Your muscles need a brief rest period after intense contraction when working hard. Your mind was the same way. Both needed a brief rest occasionally, and sometimes my body quit before my mind could. He called the times when he had to hold me “end of round two” since there were typically three rounds in an MMA fight. Noelle had been a fighter and Fury her trainer. Jax learned it from them, and held me to it the best way he could.

Instead of not believing me, my mother nodded and looked thoughtful. “I think I understand a lot of things more clearly now. And why during the worst of it, the only person you wanted was Jax.”

“I’m surprised you figured it out. Instead of telling you I wanted him, I’d make up something horrible he’d done to me earlier.” I smiled at the memory. It was a dark, miserable time in my life, but my relationship with Jax had been forged in those fires. And the fires had been so very hot.

“And I’d go tell your father to make him come apologize to you.” She grinned, wiping a tear from her cheek. “You demanded I get your father to bring Jax to apologize that first time when I asked you what you wanted to happen. After that, I knew what to do.”

“I’ve loved him my entire life, Mom. That love evolved over time as I matured, but I can’t imagine my life without him in it.”

“You don’t have to convince me, honey. To be honest, Jax is the only man I could ever see me or Vincent giving our blessing to. If he’s your choice, he’s earned our blessing many times over. As long as he treats you right and takes care of you, I’ll never say a bad word against him.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle. “Mom, he brought an Osprey and a paramilitary unit to my rescue. I’m not sure it’s possible for anyone to take better care of me than Jax.”

“Fair point.”

I took my time in the shower while Mom chatted lightly with me. It was exactly what I needed. Her voice had always soothed me. She had a way of knowing the perfect amount of conversation and when it was time to keep it light or when we could discuss harder realities. By the time I’d washed myself thoroughly and let the hot water pound on some of my sore muscles, I was so tired I was practically asleep on my feet.

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