“I won’t let you be alone tonight, Caroline. Come with me.” Cupping a hand under her elbow, safely covered by black silk, Jack lifted her from the piano stool. She rose, huge gray-silver eyes fixed on his.
Do not fuck this up,he repeated to himself over and over.
He had to get a grip. When he’d come down the stairs a few hours ago, it was as if someone had reached deep inside his head and pulled out the most compelling image he could imagine, one he didn’t even know he’d had in his head, something guaranteed to touch all his buttons and get his blood up.
The Lake dining room in candlelight, and Caroline standing there, lighting the last of the candles, the warm glow turning her skin the palest of ivories. She was beautiful beyond his wildest dreams, shiny golden red hair up so he could admire the long curve of her white neck, dressed in some elegant black dress that seemed designed specifically to show off her small waist and pale shoulders. Jack had never dared even dream that one day he’d be in Greenbriar with Caroline waiting for him with a smile—yet here he was and there she was.
And when she’d invited him into the living room—Jesus. It was like some magnificent wheel of fortune turning full circle. Life had been incredibly brutal to him his first eighteen years of life. The lowest point of his life had been when he’d stood on the other side of that window, the one right there behind Caroline. The one he was close enough to touch.
He’d been a starving, homeless half-boy, half-beast in rags,staring hungrily at a life he couldn’t even begin to fathom. He could barely imagine being on the same planet as the otherworldly creatures he had watched through the glass while shivering in the snow. Such beautiful people in such a beautiful room.
And then the wheel of fortune had turned. He’d been found by the Colonel, adopted and given everything his hungry soul ached for—love, discipline, purpose. He, the penniless boy, had even, in the end, turned into a wealthy man.
And now that wheel of fortune had turned again, richly, plunging him straight into the land of his dreams.
He was on the other side of that window, now. Not the beggar boy with his nose pressed against the glass, but the man inside the room with Caroline.
Carefully, touching her only by her material-clad elbow, he nudged her closer to him. He himself didn’t dare move. He felt like a big bar of C4 with the detonator cap in place. One wrong move and he’d ignite and explode.
No, she had to come to him. And she was, too. Carefully watching him out of huge, troubled eyes, she obeyed his touch and stepped forward until her feet stood between his and the tips of her breasts touched his chest.
Jack had no idea what she was thinking. She didn’t look consumed with desire for him. If anything, she looked sad and lost. Something would have to be done to change that because that wasn’t what he wanted from her in bed.
Slowly, carefully, he bent down to her and brushed her lips with his. Her mouth was cold—she was like a beautiful marble statue. He lifted his mouth, let his eyes roam over that lovely face, lingering on her mouth, then fit his mouthover hers again, a little more firmly. She watched him, gaze troubled, until the very last second, then her eyes finally fluttered closed.
Beneath the light eye shadow, he could see the thin tracery of delicate blue veins under the pale skin. He lifted his mouth again and touched his lips to her eyelids, then moved over to kiss the soft skin of her temple, feeling the silky strands of hair tickling his cheek.
Her skin was a little warmer now. That marble statue was slowly turning into a human woman. He touched his mouth to hers once more, a little more firmly, opening her mouth with his just enough to get one quick, heady taste of her with his tongue.
She tasted like heaven—chocolate and coffee and the wine they’d had for dinner. He could easily get drunk on her taste. He dipped his tongue in her mouth again briefly, then withdrew and lifted his head.
“Oh!” Caroline breathed, looking slightly surprised, as if a kiss were an unexpected thing. The tip of her tongue appeared and touched her lower lip, as if to taste him.
His cock throbbed at the sight, lifting and lengthening at each pass of her small tongue over that softly pink, luscious mouth. His hard-on had no place to go, trying uselessly to rise beneath the heavy denim. It fucking hurt. Jack wondered if he was doing himself some lasting damage. Could cocks break?
Every cell in his body was screaming at him to get inside her as fast as possible, but he couldn’t. Not yet. There was too great a difference in their levels of desire. He was over the top, more excited than he’d ever been in his life and Caroline—Caroline was clearly still unsure, though she wasthe one who’d spoken the words that had put things in motion.
Jack had to remember that what she’d actually said wasI don’t want to be alone tonight.
What shehadn’tsaid was—I want you to tear all my clothes off me, pin me to the ground, open my legs, and fuck me half to death.
No, that wasn’t at all what she’d said and it was a real pity because that’s what he felt like doing.
He had one shot at this—one. If he fucked up tonight, he’d never get another chance. If he got too rough, if he scared her, hurt her in any way, she’d toss him out on his ass. The one thing that shone through in Caroline was a weary, wary pride. She hadn’t let any of the circumstances of her life beat her down. She wasn’t going to put up with someone who scared her, or treated her roughly, not even if she desperately needed the money from a boarder.
Watching her eyes carefully, he bent his head again. This time the kiss was warmer, and her pretty mouth was already open for him. At the touch of her tongue to his, he jerked away as his cock surged. God, he’d nearly come in his pants.
He had to cool himself down a little, otherwise this wasn’t going to work.
He ran the back of his forefinger down her cheek, marveling at the satiny smoothness.
A deep breath, then he said what had to be said. “Caroline—I don’t want to sound unromantic, but I don’t have protection for us. I haven’t had sex for over half a year and I don’t have anything with me. Please tell me you’ve got something here.”
Shit, it hadn’t even occurred to him on the flights over. Normally, Jack always had rubbers with him. Most of his sex life was one night stands—or maybe two or even three night stands when he liked the woman enough—so he was always prepared. But he’d come home straight from the world’s largest no-sex zone. Even if he managed to get turned on by women covered with rugs, the certain knowledge that any sex partner of his would likely be stoned to death in retaliation was a real turn-off. Sex never even crossed his mind there.
He’d come home to a dying Colonel, who’d sent him on his last mission, to Africa. Jack never fucked in Africa. Never.
So here he was, with literally the woman of his dreams askinghimfor sex—or at least that’s what he hoped she’d asked for—and he was without rubbers, for the first time in his adult life.