Page 43 of Jacob

Jacob closed his eyes. “Oh, God.”

“The day I buried my folks I wanted to see you so badly. You never came. I knew you lived out at the trailer park so I biked there. I called your name and your father answered. He was drunk, said you’d left. It was… it was pretty horrible.”

“Yeah.” Jacob kissed her cheek. “I’m sorry you met him. And I’m sorry I didn’t know that your folks had died, that you had to deal with everything alone. All I knew was if I stayed, I’d end up killing my father and my life would be over.”

That day, that horrible day she buried her parents and Jake abandoned her, had been in her head for eighteen long years. Though she didn’t want it, the memories were ever fresh and she relived that day over and over again. But now, all the elements had been put in a kaleidoscope and were jumbled into a new configuration.

“You wouldn’t even look at me when you were in the bus,” she whispered. “You pretended I didn’t exist.”

That was the worst of all. The most humiliating memory. Beating her fist against the bus and Jake resolutely ignoring her. Time and again she’d asked herself if she’d someone done something to make him angry at her and could remember nothing. His hostility had seemingly come out of nowhere. It had baffled her and hurt her deeply. In many ways, it had hurt more than her parents’ death.

“I couldn’t turn my head,” Jacob said, deep voice soft. “You’d have seen the knife wound. You’d have wanted to help. I know you. You’d have wanted to go to the police, or maybe have your father talk to my father. It wouldn’t have ended well and I just knew you’d somehow get hurt. My father was escalating fast. He would have come after you if he knew I cared for you. I couldn’t stay. I knew I had to get out.”

She sighed. With each word, some blackness, some of the tangle of despair she’d lived with so long, floated away.

“I missed you so much.”

Jacob nodded. “We’ve lost so much time.” He rolled with her in his arms, and in one swipe of his hands, pulled down their pajama pants. Then he was on her with his full weight. “This first time has to be fast.”

His legs opened her and he entered her, hard and fast. It wouldn’t have worked if she hadn’t already had an orgasm. He was huge, hard like a club. He hammered into her but instead of hurting, it was pure flame, pleasure so intense it was almost painful. She disappeared and another person took her place. Not a cool scientist, no. A wild woman, drowning in pleasure. Her hips rose to meet his thrusts, hard, harder until she arched her back and exploded.

Then Jacob gave one last hard thrust, so deep inside her it felt like he could reach her heart, and with a shout started spurting inside her, prolonging her own convulsions.

Oh, God! She’d had no idea sex could be so intense. It took her long minutes to come back to herself. She was shaking and sweating, small explosions going off in her body.

Jacob collapsed onto her, head on her shoulder, lips against her ear.

“We didn’t use birth control. I didn’t think of it once. I have condoms somewhere but they could be on the back side of the moon for all the good they did us.” He didn’t sound put out or disturbed.

His words registered slowly because all the synapses in her head were fried. Finally, she put together the words he’d said and reconstructed the sentences.

She sighed and caressed his head, running her fingers through his long black hair. “It’s ok. We often go into the field in unsavory places. The CDC strongly encourages the women to go on birth control. I have an implant.”

“Good.” He hadn’t pulled out and she could feel him becoming erect again. Her vagina closed around him once, twice, and he hardened some more. Their bodies were talking to each other, a sort of call and response. “Because we’re just beginning.”

ChapterNine

“Wake up, honey.”

Alex knew that voice. A male voice telling her to wake up was a rare thing in her world and she should be curious, but she was also on an amazingly comfortable bed, and there was a low hum that was lulling. And she was still half asleep.

Didn’t want to wake up, nope. Some deep instinct told her that waking up fully and facing the day would not be as pleasant as lying on this bed, half asleep.

There was a faint aroma of fabric softener and then the sharper aroma of coffee wafted under her nose.

“Wake up and smell the coffee.”

Alex opened her eyes and there he was. Jacob. In a black tee shirt that hugged his broad shoulders, black jeans and bare feet.

Jacob. The man she’d had hot sex with for hours. She turned stop-light red.

Oh, God. It had beenyearssince she’d blushed. She could barely remember the last time. Maybe on her second day of biochemistry and she flubbed an answer to a question barked out by the prof. Certainly not in response to a man looking at her narrow-eyed, as if he wanted to gobble her up.

No, she couldn’t deal with this, the dreaded Day After.

They’d had sex so intense she’d almost passed out, and right now, she was remembering every second of it, while Jacob watched her. He knew what was going through her mind because there was no way she could hide her feelings.

Justherfeelings.

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