Page 65 of Not A Whisper

He gets up and follows me into the kitchen. “You know, I’m a little annoyed at you. Care to know why?”

“Not really, but by the sound of it, you’re going to tell me anyway.”

“How is it that your friend doesn’t know you’re seeing all three of us?”

What a ridiculous question. There is a laundry list as to why I wouldn’t just blurt out the details of my relationship with two students and their friend to Jonathan. Just thinking about that list makes my head spin. Rather than point this out, Isimply ignore Grant. I turn on the kettle to make some hot water for tea and then open the refrigerator. There’s not a ton of food, but I may be able to scrape something together for dinner. We’re going to have to start making a schedule of when they’re going to stop by. At least then I’ll be able to plan groceries better.

“Better, yet…” I jump at the sound of Grant’s voice coming from right behind me. I whirl around to see him standing there, only a foot away his face twisted in anger. “What makes you think that we’renotengaged?”

My spine straightens. “Because we’re not.”

“I’m pretty sure it was decided back in November that?—”

“I thought you were just fooling around, trying to get me riled up!” I snap, cutting him off as anger, trepidation, and hurt rolls in like a thunderstorm. “We’re not engaged, Grant. You, out of all of us, should know what a real engagement feels like.”

Grant’s face pinches, chagrin bringing color to his face. When he opens his mouth, I wave my hand to cut him off again.

“Look, I get how this engagement with Carmilla came about, and while it hurts that you didn’t trust me enough to tell me about it, that’s our reality at the moment. Maybe, once you call it off, I might find a way to get over it. What I’mnotabout to do is go around telling people I’m engaged to three guys when that’s not the case.” I hold his gaze, making sure he understands how serious I am. “I don’t mind just being your girlfriend,most of the time. That’s all I wanted from this. I get that we’re in different stages of our lives—it’s why I would never dream of asking for more.”

A hard flinch runs through Grant’s body before his jaw clenches tight. “What the hell do you mean we’re in different stages?”

“You’re going to make me spell it out? Really?”

“I’m listening, dollface,” he growls through clenched teeth.

My gaze finally shifts away from his face as I brace myself. If he really doesn’t understand, then this conversation could go in a variety of different directions.

“You’re about to graduate, start a business, and start living. That’s awesome and how itshould be.” I look back at him. Jason approaches, coming up behind Grant, his expression curious. “Your careers are going to take off, and you’re going to work hard at building this life of yours. You’re not at the point that you’re ready to settle down and have kids. But you know what? I am, or at least nearly there. Jason, last weekend you were talking about wanting four kids.” Grant’s brows fly upward in surprise as his head whips around to look at his friend. “For me to even entertain that idea is insane becauseifI was going to have that many kids, I’d want to get started in the next two or three years. Can either of you say that’s what you want and are ready for right now?”

Grant frowns, giving what I’ve said some serious thought. Jason, on the other hand, simply chuckles. Stepping around Grant, Jason saunters over beside me and drapes an arm over my shoulders.

“Oh, I don’t know. Have you triedaskingus?”

“Jason, there’s no way?—”

“The answer isno,you haven’t,” he continues, speaking over me easily. “Why do you think I brought it up?Iwas being serious. You think too much, dollie, and get too caught up in that beautiful head of yours.”

I try to shake off his arm, but Jason only applies more weight. “You’re not winning any points here.”

“C’mon, dollie, life isn’t so cut and dry. Sure, people typically go to school, get a job, then settle down, but it’s alright not to do it in that order. Trip skipped college and he’s doing just fine, Garry Gipson aside. The same thing goeswith relationships—things can just happen. Who created these phases or stages you’re trying to follow, and who determines when you hit each one? Relax and live a little. Life’s a lot more fun when it’s not so structured.”

I stare at him, letting his words soak in.AmI overly structured? Do I have set expectations that have hindered my way of thinking? Over the weekend, I was uncomfortable meeting Jason and Trip’s families due to our unusual circumstances. What we have isn’t exactly normal. But, then again, isn’t that what Jason is trying to point out? That things don’t have to be what I consider normal in order to be enjoyed?

Is this why I’m so uncomfortable with Pianna’s swift marriage? Because they aren’t doing it in the traditional sense?

I shake my head slowly, not liking that Jason might be right about my way of thinking. “So what? What are you trying to tell me?”

“That this ‘stage’ you think Grant and I are at is arbitrary and stupid,” Jason says cheerfully. “If you want a kid now? Between the three of us, I’m sure we can make that happen. Want to wait until one of us locks you down before we create an army of babies? Fine by me. But youarein the process of being locked down—meaning you're engaged to us.”

An army of babies.

I stand there, the fight draining out of me as I stare up into Jason’s hazel eyes. Last night Jason told me he loved me, and now he’s saying he’s game for having kids? He really does want a future with me. Marriage, kids, the works. All of it. As I stand there speechless, Jason leans down to capture my lips, kissing me hard on the mouth.

When he pulls away, I feel dazed.

My heart, still full of aches and pains from yesterday’s drama, swells with hope and something stronger. The smilethat stretches across my face feels silly and too wide. Jason returns it.

Grant clears his throat. Both of us turn to look at him. My smile falters. While Jason is fully onboard in this, I don’t know where Grant stands. And currently, I don’t even know where he stands with me.

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