Page 83 of One Life to Loathe

“I…” What was I supposed to say here? That conversation—one of the most difficult of my entire life—had also been one of the best things that had ever happened to me. Sam’s response had been exactly what I needed. She hadn’t tried to fix me or tell me what to do. She’d just listened and validated my feelings. “I can’t give her what she wants for her future,” I said finally. It was the only thing I had to fall back on here.

“I’m not going to tell you what you can and can’t do,” Jax said. “It ultimately doesn’t matter. You’re going to figure it out on your own.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

He shrugged. “I just want you to remember this moment when you do figure it out.”

“Geez. You’re kind of annoying. You know that, don’t you?”

“I am totally annoying,” he agreed. “I’m also here if you need to talk.” His eyes moved to the elevator as Sam stepped off with her own small suitcase. “You guys have fun, huh?”

I swallowed hard and nodded before my gaze moved over to Sam, who was dressed in comfortable capris and a simple T-shirt. She hadn’t bothered with makeup. She’d showered andpulled her hair back in a loose bun. She was utterly breathtaking when she smiled at me.

“See you Sunday night, Sam,” Jax called out to her as he headed for the hallway that led to the administration area of the hotel.

“Bye,” she replied. She looked confused when her eyes moved to me. “How does he know that I’ll be gone until Sunday?”

“I told him.” I inclined my head toward the front door. I was itching to touch her, but it would have to wait until we were in the car and away from prying eyes. “The rental was delivered to the parking garage. Are you ready?”

“Absolutely.” Sam smiled, and there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. “I’m going to research restaurants during the drive. If you’re paying, I want something good.”

I chuckled as I took her suitcase and headed for the door that led to the garage. “The sky is the limit, baby. Go big.”

“That’s exactly what I’m going to do.”

ORIGINALLY, WHEN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE JUSTme, I didn’t care about where I was going to stay for two nights. Once Sam agreed to accompany me, my attitude changed and I actually spent time deciding which hotel would be best. I landed on the St. Regis, what was considered a luxury hotel in Manhattan.

“Wow.” Sam’s eyes were as wide as saucers when we walked into the lobby hand in hand. Once we were away from Salem and the people who could make her life hell, I’d started touching her … and I hadn’t stopped. Whether my hand was on her thigh for the drive, or my fingers twined with hers, I wanted to touch her. This weekend was going to be special one way or another, and I had every intention of indulging my urges the entire time.

“Is this your first time here?” I asked her.

She nodded.

“I’ve been here three times now. It’s nice.” I moved to the front desk and pulled out my wallet. That required me to let go of her hand, and I was instantly colder. “Checking in,” I said as I handed over my ID.

She started typing. “I see you have one of our Astor suites,” she said. “That includes butler service.”

I nodded. I couldn’t see using the butler service, but it was included. Perhaps Sam would want to live large while I was at my audition. I could see her giggling about having a butler.

“You’re here for two nights at two-thousand-four-hundred and seventy-two dollars a night,” the clerk droned.

Next to me, Sam’s mouth dropped open.

I sent her a warning look. “Don’t say anything weird,” I whispered.

“I’ve never been in a hotel this expensive.” She was positively awestruck.

“Then you’re going to have fun.” I stroked my hand over her hair and kissed her forehead before retrieving my identification.

“You have a credit card on file,” the clerk said. “Is two room keys good?”

“That’s fine,” I assured her. I risked a glance at Sam as she looked around the lobby with fresh eyes. She seemed dumbstruck. Beautiful and dumbstruck. In that moment, all I wanted was to make her happy … and that was enough to fill me. There were no empty or dark places in my heart when the realization hit. I was content.

For how long, though? Was that even something I could consider keeping up? Whenever my head got involved, I became a pessimist. I just didn’t know what to do here.

Once we had our keys, we headed up to the room. Sam squealed as she ran to the window to check out the view, leavingme to wheel our suitcases into the bedroom. We had a king-sized bed, which was nice, and everything was clean and bright.

“So, I need food,” I said as I turned. I was torn between wanting to tackle her onto the bed and spending the rest of the night rolling around and enjoying the view, or getting food. When I looked at the window Sam had been staring out only seconds before, though, I found the space empty. “Sam?”