Page 44 of One Life to Loathe

“I’m not sure I do like him,” she admitted. “Part of me feels sorry for him, though. He’s awkward.”

“He is not. He’s smooth and charming with people when he wants to be.”

“And how often does he want to be?” Daisy raised an eyebrow. “Can you not see that the reason he sits in the corner and drinks by himself is because he doesn’t feel comfortable around people? I mean … you read people fairly well, Sam. Why do you keep missing the mark on him?”

The statement was like an arrow straight to my heart. “He doesn’t come across as awkward,” I argued. “I’m awkward.”

“You’re slapstick,” she countered. “You like to put yourself in a little box that says ‘funny’ on the outside of it. If you’re funny, people can’t dislike you. Deep down you’re sarcastic and mean, just like the rest of us. You need to be a people pleaser to keep getting roles, though, so you’ve simply adopted that as part of your persona.”

I didn’t like what she was saying about me. It grated.That’s because it’s the truth.Was she right? I couldn’t help thinking shewas right. I was a people pleaser by nature because it made me nonthreatening.

I was never going to be a Jennifer Lopez in life. Forget the body and entourage. I just didn’t have it in me to not care what people thought about me. I was happy being Jennifer Garner. She was a genuinely good person and people loved her for a reason. That’s who I wanted to be. She didn’t intimidate people. She was simply loved.

“Leo isn’t a bad guy,” Daisy said. “He’s just really awkward. His awkward is different from your awkward. His awkward forces him to put up walls. Your awkward forces you to break them down. In a weird way, you’re kind of a good fit.”

“I don’t like him,” I growled.

“You might not like him yet, but you want to see him naked.” Daisy shook her head when I opened my mouth to argue. “It’s not a bad thing. It’s just the way of the world.”

“And what do you think I should do about it?” I demanded. “The director was just telling me what crazy chemistry we have. If I allow myself to combust with Leo—that’s assuming he would allow it—what happens if the chemistry disappears?”

Daisy held her hands palms out. “I’m the wrong person to ask about that,” she replied. “Personally, I don’t get the whole acting thing. If you’re asking if I would give up a role on a television show to keep Jax, though, the answer is yes. He’s worth it.”

“What makes you think Leo is worth it?”

Her response was a lazy shrug. “I don’t know. It’s just a feeling I get. He’s sad, and sometimes when he looks at you, he’s not sad any longer. That kind of makes me root for him because he’s obviously got good taste.”

I couldn’t deal with this conversation for another second. “Are we still going out tonight?” I asked.

She nodded, not missing a beat. She could’ve pushed for the conversation to keep going. She didn’t, though. She seemed toread the room. “Yes. I have a unique experience you’re going to love.”

I waited for her to expand. When she didn’t, I lifted my chin. “That’s all you’re going to tell me?”

“Yup.” Daisy was solemn. “The dress is casual. You shouldn’t need a hoodie or anything because the temperature isn’t going too low tonight.”

“Who is going to be with us?”

“Just some friends,” she replied.

“Lux?” I was already afraid.

Daisy chuckled. “Lux is a new mother. Her complaints have made a shift. She’s not sleeping for a different reason now.”

“And how is the baby?”

“He still doesn’t have a name—she refuses to even consider Frank but hasn’t landed on anything else either—but he’s healthy. He’s big. He’s just not much of a sleeper.”

That made sense. “Well … I’m game for whatever you have planned. I don’t have to be on the set until ten o’clock tomorrow. I’m going to take a nap, and I’ll be bright and bubbly for our evening extravaganza.”

“That sounds like a plan. I’ll meet you down here at six o’clock.”

“I can’t wait.” I said it, but I wasn’t certain I meant it. Now that she’d brought up the chemistry between Leo and me, it was all I could think about.

Just what in the hell was I going to do about this situation?

13

THIRTEEN

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