Page 52 of Hidden By His Side

When she didn’t respond to any of his nudges to talk, Ramiro left her alone. He couldn’t keep his mind on the most recent intel Hayes had pulled on the cartel. He kept hearing that thrumming heartbeat from the doctor’s office. It pulsed through him, not letting him relax.

Watching the monitor and seeing the link to her stomach had made it impossible to ignore the obvious. The baby growing inside of her was part of Summer. The father didn’t matter. That it was Summer’s did.

The thrumming hadn’t even really sounded like a heartbeat. So why couldn’t he get it out of his head?

He’d seen her face in the office. She’d come to a decision, and he was pretty sure he knew what that decision was. Summer had a giving heart. She’d never put her own needs first.

She hadn’t been able to all those years ago. That was how she’d ended up on that bridge. It couldn’t come to that again.

Ramiro gave up on working. There needed to be another hit on the cartel since they weren’t spread as thin as he wanted, but he’d figure that out later. Summer needed him right now.

She’d moved the blanket, after all. The blue was wrapped around her, her legs curled underneath her body while she clutched that same throw pillow he’d seen her clutch so many times over the years. It was the pillow she cried into the most.

She wasn’t crying now. She stared blankly at a point on the wall.

The couch sank under Ramiro’s weight when he sat beside her. He didn’t try to coax her into his arms, he just pulled her there, knowing that’s what they both needed.

His mind drifted back to the ultrasound picture. Summer hadn’t reached for it, so he had, and when he’d gotten home, he’d put the image on his desk and stared at the blob.

Holding Summer felt right. He wondered how it would feel when her stomach bulged out.

“It’s the size of a raspberry right now,” he said, pulling her in tighter.

Summer made a small sound, burrowing against his button-down shirt. Her fingers fiddled with the pocket.

“The picture looked bigger than that,” she said, her voice husky, but she still wasn’t crying.

Silence stretched between them for a long minute. He rubbed his chin over the top of her head. “It’s okay. Go ahead. Say it.”

“I—” She stiffened in his arms, her fingers curling over the pocket as tight as they could. “I’m sorry.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry about,” he told her. “Those aren’t the words you need to say. Tell me what you’re thinking.”

Her breath shuddered against his chest. “I’m not going to have an abortion.” A sob followed the words.

He rocked her in his arms as she cried. Huge gulping wails of sounds that tore his heart in two. They were much louder than the thrumming still in his head.

Ramiro held her through the storm. He murmured words she wouldn’t be able to hear. Pointless words like “it’s okay” and “let it out” and “I’m here,” as if his presence made things easier on her.

He was only making it harder.

When she’d quieted down to hiccups and then sniffles and eventually silence again, he continued to hold her.

“I’m here,” he told her again. He wasn’t sure what else he could say. Telling her he looked forward to her having a baby would be a lie. Lying never worked. Summer knew him too well. She’d only lose trust in him.

“I’m not going to get an abortion,” she repeated, “but I’m not going to keep the baby, either. I’m going to look into putting it up for adoption.”

He hated that his initial reaction was relief. “Are you sure?”

Her fingers loosened, smoothing the material of his shirt she’d been tugging on, or at least trying to. “Yeah,” she mumbled. “It’ll be better.”

The relief drifted away like smoke, the memory of it lingering, but frustration replacing it. “Better for you, Summer?” he asked.

She was silent for too long. Then, she murmured, “Yes.”

He didn’t believe her. “Don’t lie to me.”

She pushed away from his chest. His stomach clenched at her splotchy face and hopeless eyes. “The last couple of days have been a dream. You told me you loved me. You held me as much as I’ve always craved. You took care of me.”

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