Page 80 of Shame

“At least she said yes,” I say with a chuckle.

“Yeah, at least she did,” he agrees.

Cora

One year later…

Kaison and I have been together for over a year now and this club life stuff still isn’t sticking with me. I mean, I get it, but I also don’t get it. Thankfully, I don’t have to be involved the way he is. I stop at the clubhouse now and then, especially to take Cecilia because all those big scary guys love a little baby. And there’s no place she’s safer than around all those guys. It’s funny how they turn from scary wolves into little bunnies when she’s around. She’s a lucky girl, having so many people looking out for her. Even more lucky because she has the best father ever. Well, her and I because my dad is pretty amazing too. Kaison reminds me of him so much with how he treats our daughter, and I couldn’t be happier.

“Are you ready yet?” Fia shouts from the other room.

“Almost!” I call back.

I’m getting married today.Finally. I wanted to do it right away, and we almost did, but then I decided I wanted to wait until I could fit into a dress better and drink to celebrate. I was already three months pregnant when Kaison proposed, so I was starting to show a little. We rushed through everything else in our relationship, why not this too? Some say waiting only a year is rushing, but not when it comes to us. Still, I’m happy with how things have turned out. My life is amazing, and I owe my sanity all to Kaison.

“Okay, I’m ready!” I finally shout as I get to my feet and look myself over in the full mirror.

That night my house caught fire, it destroyed it and most of the things in it. I thanked the club a million times for going in there and saving everything they could. It wasn’t a lot compared to what was lost, but to me, it was everything.

Since Kaison and I were starting a new life together, it seemed fitting to knock the house down. We were going to rebuild on the property because Kaison didn’t want us to live in his house either. It took a long time for him to tell me why. Once he did, I didn’t want to be there either.

That house has since burned down, and he swears he doesn’t know how it happened, but I see the glint in his eye. The one that tells me he knows, and he doesn’t want to lie to me, but you know… brother stuff.

So, with all the chaos of burning houses, Kaison and I decided to build our own. There was a plot of land for sale by the lake he likes to fish on. Had a dock and everything. It was perfect.So that’s what we did. Once the house was done, we moved in right away and soon after, Cecilia came, making everything in our lives perfect. Well, almost. We still had to get married, and we do plan on having more kids.

It was about a week after she was born that I decided what I wanted to do with my father’s land. It was still sitting there, with nothing on it. But it’s a beautiful piece of land, on a small pond. It was perfect for a park. Something the community can use for events. We put a statue up for my father, built a playground for the kids, and there’s even a gazebo for—you guessed it. Weddings. Or any kind of ceremony, I suppose. Now that I’m all dressed and ready to go, we can head over there.

Fia pulls the door open of her bedroom and gasps when she sees me.

“Good Lord in heaven, Cora, I wanna eat you myself!”

I giggle, looking at myself in the mirror again. I went with a simple dress, because I don’t want anything extravagant, and Kaison of course loves me in anything. Said he’d be fine to get married naked, but then no one could attend because he’d have to kill all the guys who saw me. I laughed, but I’m pretty sure he was serious.

“Shark is going to lose his mind when he sees you,” she says, grabbing my shoulders and making me spin so she can see the back.

“Hopefully not, because we have a baby to take care of.” I press my hand to my stomach, because there’s still some baby weight there. Fia slaps it away.

“Knock it off. You’re sexy as hell. Now let’s go before that man comes looking for you. We’re going to be late.”

“Why the hell are we even here?” my father grumbles as Irene fixes his tie.

“Your daughter is getting married, Calvin,” Irene says, giving me a little wave.

I wave back.

“Who, her?” My father points at me. He looks at me for a second before shaking his head. “No, I don’t have a daughter.”

It still hurts to hear that, but I try not to take offense. He hasn’t remembered me since that last night on the swing. The night before the fire.

I swear he’s still alive because he wants to be. After the Dementia, the heart attack, and the fire, the man isstillhere. He wants to be in my life, even if he doesn’t realize it or isn’t conscious of it. Deep down, I believe he’s still looking out for me. I love him for that. And even though he doesn’t recognize his granddaughter as his granddaughter, he gets so happy to see her. She makes him light up, and he talks to her like he used to talk to me when I was little. I love that and take as many pictures as I can, because once she’s older, I’m going to tell her all about her grandfather and how amazing and loving he was.

“Well, you’re going to walk her down the aisle, Calvin,” Irene says. “And you’re going to be on your best behavior.”

He blinks lazily, staring ahead. That happens more often than not. His violent outbursts have dwindled, so I’ll take it as a win. The home he lives in has worked out wonderfully. The nurses and aides and doctors there take such good care of him, and the routine they keep with him really helps with his mental state. Today may be a little tough, though, because he doesn’t enjoy being out and about. But I’ll take whatever mood he’s in, because I want my father at my wedding.

“Oh alright,” he grumbles.

At least today is a somewhat good day.

---