Page 79 of What If I Knew You

I need to skate.

I need to run.

I need to punch someone.

Or something.

Anything.

I need to fucking figure out what to do.

“Do what?” Ledger asks. “We’re just talking about the game.”

“Roche?” Harrison says my name softly, sensing my consternation. “Talk to us.”

Treading back and forth in the corner of the room, I blurt, “She’s going on a fucking date and I don’t know what to fucking do about it!”

This is it, isn’t it?

This is how I go crazy and end up in some kind of insane asylum.

Griffin catches my eye and asks, “Who is going on a date?”

“My girl.”

His brows lift. “Your girl?”

“Okay THE girl. The girl. You know? The girl I’ve been…seeing.”

“You mean the fuck-tutor? The sex lessons girl? That girl?”

“Yeah. Her name is…fuck, it doesn’t even matter what her name is because she told me last night that some other guy asked her out and that’s not sitting well with me.” I push on my chest with the heel of my hand. “Because I think I like her and when she told me about this other guy I wanted to tell her to not to do it. I wanted to beg her to pick me instead.”

Everyone nods, finally understanding.

“Are you guys in that kind of…you know, arrangement?” August asks me. “Did you agree not to see other people while she’s, you know, helping you?”

I let out a long sigh. “No. Fuck! But I like her. I mean I really like her. And it’s not just about the sex. I mean, the sex is…” I shake my head. “Well, what we’ve done so far, it’s…it’s out of this world and I want so much more of it with her. But also, she’s kind and she’s compassionate and she’s trustworthy and she’s funny and I like who I am when I’m around her.”

“Sounds like you have a bit of a crush.”

“Yeah, maybe I do, but none of that matters because some other guy asked her out and if she goes out with him, I could lose her. Not to mention the mere idea of some other guy withhis hands on her makes me want to throw up or kill someone. Or both!”

“Alright, so if you like her, tell her,” Barrett says with a shrug.

Finally, I plop down on the couch. “But what if she has me in the friend zone.”

“A friend with benefits zone, you mean,” Griffin corrects me.

“Yeah. Whatever. What if she doesn’t see me as someone who could be good for her? What if she thinks that simply because I’m not as experienced in the bedroom as she is? What if this guy is a pro at using his dick for all the fucking things? What if he’s God’s gift to women and has the world’s largest cock?”

Griffin and Ledger chuckle and wag their brows at each other. “I definitely want to meet that guy,” Griffin says.

Ledger nods. “Right? I wonder how I measure up.”

I raise my voice. “Would you guys please fucking help me? I’m going crazy here!”

Griffin nods. “I see that.”

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