Page 115 of What If I Knew You

“Yeah but we can’t tell whose is whose.” I shrug.

“That’s okay!” She nudges my shoulder. “It’ll be fun to guess. I wonder which ones are Griffin’s! Let’s go sit down and study this a little closer.”

Scrolling through each picture, Layken and I scream in laughter. The first picture was a set of balls covered in aspattering of red and green glitter titledMERRY DICKMAS. Another set of balls is decorated in red and silver glitter resembling a candy cane or a piece of peppermint candy. The wordsIT’S NOT GOING TO LICK ITSELFwritten at the bottom. Another all in green with the wordsHE’S A MEAN ONEwritten across the middle.

“Oooh this one shows creativity!” Layken says, pointing at the picture of balls covered in red glitter with white glitter around the bottom so it looks like a Santa hat. The words

HE KNOWS IF YOU’VE BEEN BAD OR GOODscrolled across the top.

“You’re definitely right there. Someone took a hot minute to make that look good. Doesn’t look like Bodhi’s balls though so I bet they’re not his.”

The next one is all gold and resembles a bell, and unsurprisingly readsJINGLE MY BELLand the next is completely red with the wordsWILL YOU RIDE MY SLAY TONIGHT.

Layken cackles. “Nice play on words with that one.”

The last one makes us laugh so damn hard we both lose our breaths. With the wordsNAUGHTY GIRLS GET NOTHING BUT COAL, the last set of balls is decked in black glitter and very much resembles the shiniest piece of coal we have ever seen.

“Oh shit! That one might be the winner!”

Scarlett

OMG! These are TESTI-TACULAR! LOL!!

Ella

Right? I can’t even figure out which pair belongs to August! Does that make me a bad wife?

Scarlett

Nah. They’re all covered so it’s hard to tell. Though I think the Will You Ride My Slay Tonight might belong to Oliver. His right side hangs a little lower than his left

Me

The things I didn’t know I would learn tonight… LMAO!

Scarlett

Teehee! Sorry! I guess I’m a bit of an over-sharer. Or I’m just comfortable enough among like-minded women to not care.

Ella

So, do you all have a favorite? Because I snorted at the black shiny piece of coal.

Me

I have to admit, I laughed a little extra hard at that one too. Definite creative points.

Scarlett

Yep. I can definitely give props to the shiny black ball. Corrigan, does that naughty girl ornament belong to you?

Me

*GIF of Elmo shrugging* I mean, I can hope, right? Cause I wouldn’t mind being naughty and playing with that a little but also if those balls belong to one of your men, then just pretend I said absolutely nothing.

Scarlett

LOL deal!

---